09/09/2025
9-9-9 portal ✨
🌝 Post- full moon eclipse reflection ;
Oops, I did it, again. I hopped on a plane solo and am headed for the mountains. My place of total peace, freedom, and relaxation. A place that resets my system and awakens my soul.
It’s been such an incredibly rewarding summer, HELL, it’s been an incredibly rewarding YEAR and we still have 3 months left!
There’s been a lot of growth in this last year, embarking on solo adventures for myself, my kids, and my family. But the rewards also come with risk and challenges…
Like trying to sleep for night shifts with 4 boys running sprints around the house, keeping on top of daily chores, remaining human and functioning as a person. Maintaining a healthy marriage, keeping up with friendships…
Can we be real here?
It’s HARD to be an adult. Moreover, a functioning adult that is a positive contributor to society.
If anything my grief has taught me over the past few years of losing loved ones, it’s to really, truly LIVE EACH DAY like it’s your last.
To do whatever sets your soul on fire and brings happiness to your heart.
This May, I took on a new role as a shelter support worker, and never did I dream of saying “I look forward to going to work” - but I do! - it has felt nothing short of purposeful and adds great joy to my journey of being one of God’s servants here on Earth.
- (That’s the only way I can describe it)
- And with that being said, summer was so busy with work, photography, vacations, and planning fun things for everybody else’s enjoyment, that I forgot to do something for MYSELF. Soul-y just ME. TAYLOR.
Not mom, not wife, not sister, friend, or employee. Just TAYLOR.
And guess what, everyone and everything will have to wait, until I am of clear mind and can relieve a little pressure off my plate.
- It’s hard to find & create a balance in this world. There are always things we can be doing… the doing never stops, and sometimes, the constant doing still never feels good enough.
That’s how it’s felt for me recently and I could feel myself slipping…
- So, about 2.5 weeks ago I booked my flight and said, “I am going on a solo vacation”.
- It didn’t take me long to figure out where I was going… I knew where I was being called. And that is back to Colorado to be spoiled by my auntie & uncle to refresh my spirit.
But- that doesn’t mean I haven’t felt an immense amount of guilt and some mild shame and sadness on top of excitement and pleasure.
The past couple of days I’ve been ruminating over all the things that I haven’t done, or that I’ve been “slack on” recently and it’s been really eating me alive.
However, I took that as more of a push to get on the damn plane and head to a place that brings me joy and helps me to feel a little less like everyone else’s servant.
I need to fill my cup at the end of the day too, because it helps me to be a better all around version of ME. So I can continue to pour into the people I love, alongside the many jobs and duties I have to fulfill here on Earth.
So while I know, I have a HUGE backlog of editing to be done, with client galleries to complete, I want everyone to know that I must take this time for me to recoup and rebuild a better plan for balancing my time, my work, and my life in general. It. Is. Not. Easy.
I appreciate each and everyone who stays and supports my journey, because man. Some days it’s pretty messy. — and I guess that’s the beauty of it. We’re just here figuring s**t out as we go, and not necessarily with a “plan”. The best things I’ve ever had in my life, were all unplanned. And those are my 4 amazing boys.
So, I am away starting today until September 20th and I will be picking away at galleries with the change of season and slowing down of life.
But for now, in this moment…
I’m going to enjoy the last bits of my summer that is just for me. To bring myself back to wholeness, wellness, and service.
and I hope you find the time for you, too. 🫶🏼
With love & gratitude,
Tay. 💛
