Bayridge Counselling Centres

02/09/2026

And this applies to all the pronouns. And the truth of the matter, it goes back to being a baby or a very young child most often. Many of us have c-ptsd which is created in many formations, such as being under stress for a very long time and yet have no idea.

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02/09/2026

It would be beneficial if all of us listened to this one. Because the truth is we all have so many different kinds of relationships and it can get tricky on 'how to be a good person' and 'how to take care of each other'.

02/09/2026

We are going to get upset, and sometimes we are going to get really upset because we are human. However when we are tired, hungry, sick or even feeling lonely, it's so much harder to use our tools to understand each other with clarity and it is extremely hard to respond wisely. Let's accept it and then create a plan with each other for when it happens again, we find ways to pause to cool down to return to each other from a place of wisdom that comes from clarity and not hot emotions.

02/08/2026

Always. ❤️

Quote Credit: ❣️

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02/08/2026

Do you know their love language? Perhaps start there. 🧠👌

Side note: it has to be realistic expectations. We want healthy only. ☝️

We often make the mistake of loving others the way we want to be loved. If you value words of affirmation, you shower your partner with compliments; if you value acts of service, you spend your weekend fixing things around their house. But if their primary language is physical touch or quality time, your efforts—no matter how sincere—might feel like static on a radio station they aren’t tuned into. You’re speaking "French" to someone who only understands "Spanish."

True intimacy begins when you stop projecting your own needs and start observing theirs. It requires a selfless shift in perspective: learning to give what is meaningful to them, even if it feels foreign to you. When you speak your partner's love language, you aren't just performing a task; you are validating their unique emotional blueprint. It’s the difference between "doing things" and truly making someone feel seen, heard, and cherished.

02/08/2026

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Bluesky 👉 https://bit.ly/ElephantJournalBluesky & our Newsletter, the Mindful Gap 👉 elephantjournal.com/best

02/07/2026

Emotionally healthy does not mean that we will not make mistakes from time to time. It does not mean that we are going to be happy all the time because that’s not reasonable. And for many of us, it is looking at what is reasonable what is not especially when we’ve had chaos in her life in an hour bringing. And we are tired of pain. So we want to get to a point off healthy, and safe and secure so knowing what that looks like with reasonable expectations can help our nervous system feel relaxed and experience more joy even when we’re having conflict.

One of the clearer contrasts between emotionally healthy patterns and narcissistic dynamics shows up around mistakes.

Emotionally healthy people still miss the mark. Errors happen. Humanity is part of the picture.

What differs is capacity.

The capacity to pause rather than deflect.
The capacity to acknowledge impact rather than erase it.
The capacity to remain present without sinking into shame or redirecting responsibility.

Within narcissistic dynamics, mistakes can feel like a threat to identity itself. In that context, accountability may become overwhelming.

Within healthier dynamics, mistakes tend to function as information. They offer insight. And from that space, repair can exist.

Educational content only and does not establish a therapy relationship.

02/07/2026

‘this’ 💪👍🧠😊👌

Leave a 💙 if you agree.

02/06/2026

The reason why we have unhealthy relationships as an adult is linked to what we observed as a child. 🧠

Words exchanged between parents often echo in a child’s heart long after they’re spoken.💔

02/06/2026

It’s very different to be in a healthy relationship. 🧠☝️👍😊

Notice what happens during gaps in conversation. Do you feel pressure to fill them? Do they seem uncomfortable with quiet? Do you find yourself talking just to avoid awkwardness?

Watch the micro-moment when neither person is speaking. Is there peace or tension? Can you just exist together without performing entertainment?

Pay attention to whether silence feels like connection or disconnection. In healthy relationships, quiet companionship still feels like intimacy. In anxious relationships, silence feels like something's wrong.

The quality of your silence together tells you whether you're comfortable with each other's unperformed presence or only comfortable when someone's actively engaging.

02/06/2026

Things not to say. 🧠☝️

DBT Skills. Interpersonal Effectiveness Module. Invalidation.