Sondra the Therapist Doula

12/27/2025

There’s a quiet pressure that shows up every January:

decide who you’ll be now. fix what wasn’t enough. try harder.

But most of us don’t need fixing.
We need pausing.
We need checking in.
We need room to recalibrate after living through another year.

Research consistently shows that rigid New Year’s resolutions don’t stick—especially when they’re rooted in shame, urgency, or “shoulds.”

Behaviour change is far more sustainable when it comes from self-compassion, internal motivation, and small, flexible goals, not self-criticism or all-or-nothing thinking.

A reset doesn’t have to mean reinvention.
It can sound like:

What actually worked for me last year?

What drained me more than it gave?

What do I want a little less of? A little more of?

This isn’t about becoming someone new.
It’s about coming back into yourself.

If January feels heavy, that’s information—not failure.

Let this be a check-in, not a performance review.

A noticing, not a demand.

You’re allowed to begin the new year softly, gently, loving yourself for all you are, as you are.

What are you wanting a little more of this season of your life ?

12/22/2025

You don’t need to feel calm.
You don’t need to feel grateful all the time.
Regulation is about offering your body small moments of support.

Be soft with yourself this season.

12/14/2025

I’ve been thinking a lot about traditions lately.

When they’re rooted in choice, connection, and meaning, they can feel nourishing.
But when they turn into pressure, expectation, or obligation… they stop being traditions.

They become something we endure.

This season, I’m practicing being softer with them.
Asking myself:
✨ Does this still feel good to me?
✨ Or does it feel like compliance?

You’re allowed to honour yourself this holiday season.
That might mean:
• Saying no to gatherings that drain you
• Shortening visits
• Skipping the “we’ve always done it this way”
• Creating new rituals that actually fit your nervous system now

Saying no doesn’t make you ungrateful.
It makes you honest.

If your body is already holding tension, try this when the overwhelm creeps in:
🌿 Drop your shoulders and unclench your jaw
🌿 Place one hand on your chest, one on your belly
🌿 Slow your exhale just a little longer than your inhale
🌿 Name 3 things you can see, 2 you can feel, 1 you can hear

Let your body lead—not guilt, not obligation, not old rules that no longer serve you.

You get to choose softness.

You get to choose rest.

You get to choose what feels like home in your body.

This is your permission slip. 🤍

12/06/2025

Today is the International Day of Remembrance and Action on Violence Against Women, and I’m holding space for the countless women, girls, and gender-diverse people whose lives have been impacted by gender-based violence.

This day isn’t symbolic—it’s a reminder of the real, ongoing harm in our communities and the responsibility we share to interrupt it.

In Canada, the numbers are staggering. Every six days, a woman is killed by her intimate partner.

Two-thirds of people who experience intimate partner violence are women, and rates are even higher for Indigenous women, racialized women, disabled women, and 2SLGBTQIA+ people.

Trans women and transfeminine people continue to face disproportionate levels of harassment, assault, and fatal violence—often in the very spaces where they should be safest.

These aren’t just statistics. They’re your neighbor, friend, teacher, the person beside you in the grocery store Line.

Beyond awareness here are some things you can do to take real action in your community.

💛 Learn to recognize the early signs of coercion, control, and isolation.

💛 Support the organizations doing frontline work—shelters, crisis lines, advocacy groups, and community-led supports.

💛 Push for policies that protect survivors, address systemic inequality, and reduce barriers to safety, especially for those at greatest risk.

💛 Interrupt harmful jokes, dismissive comments, and the everyday normalization of violence. That’s where culture changes.

Gender-based violence is preventable. It’s not inevitable. And when we show up—loudly, consistently, and with care—we help build a world where women, girls, and Trans and gender-diverse people can live with safety, dignity, and hope.

10/18/2025

In the darkest corners of the forest, fungi thrive where others cannot. They break down what’s decayed, turning it into the foundation for new life. Hidden underground, their networks quietly connect trees and plants, sharing nutrients and information that help the whole ecosystem survive.

There’s something deeply human in that. When we’re in dark times—grieving, struggling, or simply lost—it’s tempting to see that darkness as waste, as something to escape. But like the fungi, we can learn to stay close to the soil of our experience, to process what’s broken down, and to transform it into something nourishing.

We can also remember the mycelial truth: we are not alone. Our connections, even the quiet, unseen ones, sustain us. Reaching out, sharing resources, asking for support—these are the threads that help us heal and regrow.

Resilience isn’t about staying in the light all the time. It’s about trusting that even in the dark, we’re part of a living network, still capable of transforming decay into growth.

10/13/2025

Important information for everyone

I work with parents and kids all week, many with ADHD diagnoses (for the kids, parents, or both).

And one thing that comes up again and again is how this invisible difference shows up in the everyday stuff.

The things that look “easy” for everyone else…
can feel so f’ing hard.

Getting out the door on time.
Remembering forms.
Keeping up with the little things (the 9 million little things!)

This post shares a few of those invisible challenges we’ve been talking about lately.

💬 What do you identify with most?
If ADHD is part of your family , what are some of the ways it makes daily life feel a little heavier (even when no one else can see it)?

10/10/2025

Your mental health is not a project — it’s a practice.

Tend to it gently, often, and without apology.

10/01/2025

As the seasons shift from summer to fall, our moods and energy often shift too. The shorter days, cooler air, and changes in routine can bring comfort for some and heaviness for others. If you’ve noticed yourself feeling a little “off,” you’re not alone.

Fall can stir up…
☀️ lower energy from less sunlight
💭 feelings of loss as summer fades
📚 stress from busier schedules
🌙 dips in mood or motivation

Here are a few gentle ways to support yourself:

✨ soak up natural light when you can
✨ build cozy, grounding routines
✨ move your body in ways that feel good
✨ nourish with warm, seasonal foods
✨ stay connected with people who lift you up

This season is an invitation to slow down, reflect, and care for yourself in small, meaningful ways. Be gentle—you don’t need to do it all.

🤎 What’s one little ritual or comfort that helps you feel supported in the fall?

09/13/2025

✨ Nostalgia is such a tender visitor. ✨

Sometimes it shows up as joy—reminding us of laughter, milestones, and the people who shaped us. Other times, it carries grief—reminding us of what has changed, what we’ve lost, or what can’t be lived again.

Both truths can exist at once. It’s okay if nostalgia feels bittersweet.

When it arises:
🌿 Pause and breathe—notice the feelings without rushing them away.
🌿 Hold compassion for the part of you that misses what once was.
🌿 Carry forward the warmth, lessons, or connection those memories still hold.

Nostalgia doesn’t ask us to return—it invites us to honor our story and bring its richness into the present. 💛

09/05/2025

As the air turns crisp and the days shorten, I’m reminded how quickly time moves. Seasons shift almost in the blink of an eye, and with them, so do we.

Fall invites us to pause, connect, and really be in the moment. Whether that’s sharing a warm drink with someone you love, stepping outside to notice the leaves changing, or reaching out to a friend you’ve been meaning to call—it’s these small acts of connection that root us as life moves forward.

This season, I’m holding onto presence and gratitude. Let’s remind ourselves that even though time feels fast, we have the power to slow down and savour what matters most.

✨ What’s one way you’re choosing to embrace this season of change?

08/24/2025

🌿 The Importance of Rest 🌿

Rest is more than just sleep. It’s the pause that lets us breathe, reset, and return to our lives with more clarity and care. In a world that praises hustle, giving ourselves permission to slow down is an act of courage and compassion.

✨ Here are 3 ways to engage in true rest beyond sleep:

1️⃣ Digital Boundaries – Try unplugging from screens for a while. A break from constant notifications gives your mind space to quiet down.

2️⃣ Gentle Movement – Rest doesn’t always mean stillness. Walking in nature, stretching, or slow yoga can bring deep renewal.

3️⃣ Soulful Pause – Engage in something that nourishes you: journaling, listening to music, sipping tea, or simply sitting in silence.

💛 Rest—it’s a way of honouring your body and spirit. You deserve it.