02/09/2026
Changing your mind.
One of my favourite responses to likes/dislikes/preferences is “I always reserve the right to change my mind”
And boy, have I changed my mind during my life time.
Most recently about marriage.
As far as I can remember I NEVER wanted to get married. Let’s just say I haven’t seen the best examples of marriages growing up, nor did I see many that were long lasting.
I also had the belief that saying “I do” binds you to a person, almost as property, and I could never do that, I’m a free bird that can’t be caged!
Fast forwards to my relationship with James, the many years of him patiently standing by me, giving me space and trust as I reworked myself over and over in therapy, expanding, changing, shifting.
I knew my heart was always keeping a wall to the fortress, not FULLY committed, not fully open. This might have felt safe for a certain time in my life, but then it started feeling like I was cutting my experience of love short. Unable to fully feel the enormity of all-encompassing love to source, yourself, a partner, friends, community, nature. It felt like a hinderance.
So I worked my ass off in therapy, faced all the versions of me who thought true connection was unsafe, who felt let down when attempted vulnerability in the past. I also allowed myself to truly RECEIVE, which is not something that comes easily to me.
I’m not done with this work, but the changes are incredible.
So, do yourself a favour, and always leave room to change your mind.
You have no idea where life can take you, don’t get stuck for the sake of sticking to principles that you may have grown out of.
