01/13/2026
The other evening I had my grown children over for supper. I love nothing more than when we are all under the same roof, but I had never planned a “come over for dinner” time before. I didn’t realize that was something that I should be doing as an adult. I just always tell them they can come any day, any time, and I’ll happily welcome and feed them. It wasn’t until it was asked of my why I never actually planned something that I realized I’d been doing it wrong.
Listen…I’m autistic. This is also my first time attempting to adult in this life - something that I’ve always not been too keen on. I need things spelled out for me a lot of the time.
So, when my younger daughter announced she would be coming down to have a sleepover with me, I figured it was a perfect time to try this inviting my older daughter and her boyfriend over thing.
Dinner was delicious and relaxed and we were all chatting and watching tv and just hanging out. Suddenly my inner voice panicked and thought “ok Jodi, don’t blow this.” As I said before, I’m new to this whole thing and I have no idea what is expected in a situation like this. So I took a deep breath, and just asked,
“Am I doing this right?”
A simple enough question but one that I was both nervous and embarrassed to ask. It was the most unmasked thing that I have INTENTIONALLY done. It was scary and liberating. I lived through it.
Turns out I was doing things exactly as they all thought it should be and everyone was happy, comfortable and content.
I’m almost 55 years old (freaks out in senior discount), I’m learning to navigate the understanding that I am who I am, paired with also navigating roles and chapters that society thinks I should just know how to do. It’s a lot. It’s nerve wracking and exciting and fulfilling and scary. But I’m doing it. Maybe not as organized and aesthetically pleasing as expected, but that just wouldn’t be me.
Where are my other midlife neurodivergent women at? Have you had to find your way through something similar?
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Loveyoukaybyeeeee,
Jodi 🖤