Katie Palframan Counselling

12/30/2025

Relationships are not just about love — they’re about emotional availability, responsiveness, and safety.

When you’ve experienced attachment trauma, you may have learned to tolerate emotional distance, inconsistency, or unmet needs just to stay connected. You learned how to adapt. How to wait. How to minimize yourself.

But healing changes things.

As you reconnect with your needs, your nervous system becomes less willing to accept what once felt “normal.”
Unfulfilling relationships start to feel louder.
More uncomfortable.
Harder to ignore.

And that can hurt.

It can feel like loss, grief, or even failure ..”Why can’t I make this work anymore?”
But from an attachment lens, this discomfort is not a setback.

✨ It’s the gift.

It’s your system saying: I want more safety. More reciprocity. More emotional presence.

Not everyone will be able to meet you there.
Not because you’re “too much.” Not because you’re expecting perfection.
But because healing often outgrows the capacity of certain relationships.

Secure, safe, meaningful connection requires:
• Emotional accessibility
• Responsiveness
• Engagement

When those pieces aren’t available, no amount of effort, patience, or self-blame will create them.

Healing doesn’t make relationships fall apart..
✨ it reveals the truth of them.

And even though that truth can hurt, it also creates space for relationships that feel steadier, safer, and more alive.

You’re not losing people because you’re healing.
You’re learning who can truly walk with you.

💛

— Katie Palframan Counselling
Attachment-focused, Emotionally-Focused, Trauma-informed/responsive therapy ❤️‍🩹

12/28/2025

🎄 Happy (very) late Holidays! 🎄

I hosted for a few days… which means I’m currently running on leftovers, coffee, and deep breaths 😅
Feeling grateful, a little tired, and so excited for what 2026 has in store.
I can’t wait to continue working with my wonderful clients — and I’m accepting new ones too in the new year.
Here’s to rest, connection, and a fresh year ahead 🤍 I am excited to update you on what I’ve been working on throughout this year and what I hope to continue in 2026!

11/21/2025

When your safe place has 4 legs and big ears 🐶💗
Because sometimes we need a companion who meets us exactly as we are. No words or solutions necessary, just closeness 🥰

But I also want to honour something real: not everyone has a safe person or being to turn to—and many people truly believe they never will. If that’s you, I want to gently offer you this…

Safety isn’t only something we find in others. It’s also something we slowly learn to build inside ourselves.

It starts with tiny moments:
When you soften instead of shame yourself.
When you listen to your needs instead of pushing through.
When you offer compassion to the parts of you that have been hurt, guarded, or misunderstood.

External connection absolutely matters, deeply. Humans are wired for it.
But internal safety matters too. It’s the place we return to even when no one else is available. It’s the voice inside that says, “I’m here. I won’t abandon you.”

Whether your safe place has 4 legs, 2 legs, or exists quietly within you… you deserve connection that lets you breathe, settle, and feel alive again.

You’re not behind. You’re not hopeless.
You’re learning safety—inside and out—and that’s courageous work 💪🙌🩷

11/20/2025

Little too pumped about this galaxy light 🤪💗

Check out katiepalframanmsw’s video.

11/19/2025

11/11/2025

🌿 A Note of Gratitude 🌿

The past while has tested me in ways I could never have prepared for. Watching someone you love fight for their life brings up every human emotion — fear, hope, helplessness, love, and the kind of strength you don’t know you have until you need it.

Through it all, I’ve been reminded of the incredible power of connection — the messages, prayers, and kindness so many shared for my dad and our family have meant more than words can say. They’ve carried me through moments of deep fear and reminded me that resilience doesn’t mean being unshaken — it means allowing yourself to feel it all and still keep going.

As a therapist, I often talk about the courage it takes to stay open in the face of pain. It’s one thing to talk about this and there is no level of preparation that makes living it any easier. Hope and fear can coexist. Strength and tears can, too.

Thank you for holding space for me — for us — through this. 💛
Here’s to healing, hope, and the resilience that comes from love.

— Katie 🌱

11/11/2025

As some of you know, my dad went in for open heart surgery this morning for a double bypass. This is scary because he’s been my rock and is my only living parent because I lost my mother in 2014.

Sometimes life throws you situations where you are completely powerless. You can’t do anything to control outcomes. You’re scared, exhausted, sad, and completely out of control. You can either choose to be a sitting duck or you can create an opportunity to focus on what is in your control, how strong you are no matter what life throws at you. As I wait, I’m choosing strength. I’m choosing forward, no matter what that looks like 🙏

10/31/2025

It’s a good day to get some advanced training done for EMDRIA certification 💯 …Happy Halloween! 🎃 👻

10/31/2025

I’ve been screaming this from the rooftops my whole life — attachment wounds matter.
They don’t “just go away.”
You don’t grow out of them.
And avoiding them doesn’t make you stronger — it just makes you tired.

Attachment injuries show up in adulthood disguised as:

✨ Over-functioning & burnout
✨ People-pleasing
✨ Fear of being “too much” or “not enough”
✨ Pushing people away when you actually need closeness
✨ Terrified of conflict but equally terrified of abandonment
✨ Struggling to trust safety when it finally shows up

And no — this isn’t about blaming parents or reliving the past for the sake of pain.

It’s about honoring the good-enough child inside you — the one who learned to survive by shrinking, by staying quiet, by being “easy,” by anticipating everyone else’s needs but never feeling free to have your own.

You didn’t fail.
You adapted.
Brilliantly.

But adaptation isn’t the same as healing.

And healing means gently turning toward those old wounds — not to stay there, but to finally let them heal. Give them the process they so deserve and crave.

You deserve secure connection.
You deserve to feel safe in love.
You deserve to stop fighting battles that started before you could even speak.

Attachment work isn’t soft.
It’s brave.
It’s messy.
It’s life-changing.

And if no one ever told you:
You were a good-enough child.
You are a good-enough human.
You are worthy of love that feels like home.

💛

Loving you loudly,

Your attachment therapist who’s been yelling this forever😅🤣 ✨

10/07/2025

“Little t” traumas are often brushed off, minimized, or left unspoken. They’re the moments of feeling dismissed, misunderstood, and invalidated.
But those moments matter — they shape how safe we feel in relationships.
It’s possible to love someone and feel hurt by them.
It’s possible to name those wounds and move forward in new ways.
Healing doesn’t erase the past — it changes the story going forward. ✨

10/06/2025

🌿 When You Just Feel “Blah”

Ever have those days where nothing is technically wrong… but everything just feels kinda heavy? Like you wanna burrito yourself in a fuzzy blanket and say “byeeee ✌️” to everything for a bit?

You’re tired. Unmotivated. A little disconnected. It’s like your mind and body quietly hit low-power mode 😬

Sometimes this happens when we’ve been carrying a lot for a long time. Even if we’ve been holding it together on the outside, eventually our system says, “Alright, I’m tapping out.” So we slow down, get quieter, or just… stall.

And honestly? That “blah” state isn’t a flaw to fix. It’s usually a soft nudge from somewhere inside saying, “Hey. Pay attention. Something needs you.”

When we stop bulldozing through and actually notice these signals, we give ourselves a shot at understanding what’s going on underneath. And that’s often where the real shifts start. 💛

If you’ve been stuck in that blah space lately, you’re not broken and you’re definitely not alone. Therapy can be the place where you don’t have to bloom — you can just bundle up, drop the mask, use whatever four-letter words you need to, and keep going.

You got this 🙌🤘✨