Parul Shah

Parul Shah Welcome to the Official page CEO, Founder & Psychotherapist of , Parul Shah!

Rumours has it …”that she is unattractive, overweight, bossy, self-absorbed, arrogant, egotistical, and fake”.Rumours an...
03/05/2026

Rumours has it …”that she is unattractive, overweight, bossy, self-absorbed, arrogant, egotistical, and fake”.

Rumours and gossip are reputation destroyers. I have been the subject of gossip and rumours for decades, not by men ,but by women, particularly women in business , women in leadership roles and within the same industry. Some of these rumours almost defined my identity, while others were almost costly and strained my family and my marriage.

Rumour has it ….that rumours are not facts; they are perceptions of how others view you. So, why do we spend so much time debating, defending, and justifying against them?

Rumour has it ….that gossip, groups people together, leaving the person being gossiped about to defend themselves.

Rumour has it …that those who choose this path are unhappy with who they are and project onto others to avoid being perceived as less than and to gain power & popularity.

Rumour has it ….that I do not care what people say about me. The truth is, that those who know me, who know my flaws and mistakes, accept me as I am. More importantly, I own it , share it and accept me as a flawed and beautifully broken human. I have F..ked UP! As a human, I take responsibility for my actions. Accountability fosters growth.

I used to say, “I am the same person publicly, personally, and professionally”. You have all of me, including the calm one, the peaceful one, the angered one, the one who takes their time to process things one, the one who wears their heart on their sleeve, the intelligent one, the listening ear one, the compassionate one, the fiery one, the one who takes no s..t one, the one who stands up and speaks up, the advocate one, the loving one, the unbothered one.”

So, as rumour has it…..go ahead and talk about me. I do not care.

I own my story, the one that got hurt for being “nice.” It taught me a very valuable lesson: there is a difference between being nice and being kind. I am no longer “nice.” I am kind and will continue to carry myself with humility, dignity, integrity, transparency, grace and gratitude.

Rumour has it…Stay Unbothered.





Toxicity is pervasive and inescapable.Despite its prevalence, toxicity can severely damage individuals.The term “toxic” ...
03/04/2026

Toxicity is pervasive and inescapable.

Despite its prevalence, toxicity can severely damage individuals.

The term “toxic” has become fashionable, even when calling out or anger are justified.

Being labelled “toxic” dates back to my early 40s.

The label was given by trusted individuals, women I trusted, women in the same industry.

When an authentic person recognizes an imbalance of power, we often address it, question it, seek answers and clarification. However, toxicity infiltrates like a broken dam.

Once labelled toxic without evidence beyond our own experiences, the label becomes an invisible permanent mark on those who never deserved it. It becomes an injury.

As we observe in the world, power and control are the ultimate goals for many to ensure submissiveness persists. Consequently, those who perceive truth are often met with accusations of being liars.

A toxic truth: the more we resist, the more formidable it becomes.

The exhaustion that accompanies battling such a demon can occupy valuable time and energy.

As a woman, I have endured the toxic trenches and witnessed how others, even leaders, still lead by silencing others.

Empowering women presents a challenge for those of us who have been branded with the toxic label and have confronted countless instances of such toxicity.

A toxic truth : is that empowerment requires humility and no judgment in the same spaces. However, life is not governed by such principles; it is driven by competition.

A Toxic truth : I would rather live and lead a solitary life than ever be associated with anyone who conducts tearing someone apart privately while presenting a different public persona. There are masked humans among us.

A toxic truth: I’d rather start fresh with my integrity intact than give in to those who introduced greed and ownership without the effort.

Giving up is not an option, nor is giving in.

Therefore, discernment becomes a means of leading outside of such truth.

Truth-tellers are silenced by power.

However, discernment offers another way to overcome this challenge.

Toxicity is not empowerment; it is a psychological dictatorship that can ultimately alter someone’s life and even lead to their demise. Moral injuries are very real.

Toxicity exists within womanhood, and it’s important we acknowledge and discuss it openly.

Let’s share stories that changed our lives by owning our truth and challenging the discomfort. Knowledge is power.

Toxicity serves as a prison. Yet, You always had the key to escape, heal, recover and grow.

We will transform into a different kind of human, capable of breathing even in the face of judgment. Embrace discernment!

Support. Strength. Thrive.





There are layers within me that could change how you perceive me, make you cry, cheer for me, understand me, gossip abou...
03/03/2026

There are layers within me that could change how you perceive me, make you cry, cheer for me, understand me, gossip about me or even make you angry and avoid me. The possibility of these reactions doesn’t concern me; it’s how you perceive me in your space. I own all the layers within me. The possibility is a projection of what you’re unwilling to see in yourself, leading to blame and conformity. Knowing I was once a people-pleaser makes me a target. The possibility of staying comfortable is a constant challenge, as leadership demands action and silence is no longer a neutral option. Despite numerous blows, if I illustrated this, my body would be covered in bruises, cuts, and scars. Yet, women are taught to remain silent, even from other women and women in leadership roles. To stay small so they can grow. The last 21 months taught me that some women may admire, aspire to be, or love your work but will never admit they used you for advantage. I’ve become a better woman since experiencing this storm. I no longer seek to know or hear, become reactionary, or be bothered. Those who create storms are not relatable to me; they thrive in chaos for comfort, power, and control. When peace arrives, it mirrors the discomfort they’ve been avoiding. Every human deserves a space, but not every space deserves your justification or energy. Unbothered is demonstrated by knowing all of the above and moving boldly regardless of others’ opinions. The layers within me brought me here, and I’m eternally grateful and humbled by the obstacles I never deserved. I am me because of the layers of those who support me and those who chose to use me and place public judgment. Thank you for being a guiding light that finally helped me become unbothered.





Holding space is a fundamental concept in the therapeutic world, where it is often emphasized to clients the importance ...
03/02/2026

Holding space is a fundamental concept in the therapeutic world, where it is often emphasized to clients the importance of honouring their emotions through therapeutic validation , safety and active listening . However, what happens when a therapist may not be able to fully comprehend the details of what is shared? Can you truly hold space if you never been in a uniform or lived with someone in uniform?

Trauma-trained therapists are well-versed in the art of holding space. This involves safety, guiding , validating , and supporting the process of trauma-related details without altering, fixing, changing or even shifting the 911 language.

In the first responder world, this concept encompasses various aspects, including the uniform, the lingo, the scenes, the unknown, the connections, the duty, the service, the family, the shifts, the boots on the ground, the codes, the injury ,the aftermath, and more.

Imagine entering an office space and encountering a mental health professional who is unable to hold this space. Understanding is not solely about training; it is about comprehending the true meaning of this life in uniform and behind the badge.

Holding space for our 911 community extends beyond the role of a first responder clinician. The lived experiences of this demographic become a pivotal aspect of being a therapist to those in uniform.


When you live and breathe within the first responder world , the essence of community is experienced differently.The imb...
02/28/2026

When you live and breathe within the first responder world , the essence of community is experienced differently.

The imbalance of trust and the lack of transparency within services can erode this concept .

Consequently, what happens to family members when trust of such a community becomes a constant hesitation?

We learn to build our own.

Coffee connections are often simple ways to bring a community together.

They force us to have uncomfortable conversations and relearn to trust ourselves that not everyone is seeking information.

It allow us to hear that even when the internal battle may feel very isolating, the emotions we experience are similar, leaving us less alone and more understood.

First responder family members are often a pivotal team player in a first responder’s mental wellness. Therefore, why not create connections that support one another so we can support the ones we love in uniform.

Something is percolating ! 💙


Yesterday’s posts were intentional & aimed to explore the impact of frontline trauma, first responders’ experiences, fam...
02/27/2026

Yesterday’s posts were intentional & aimed to explore the impact of frontline trauma, first responders’ experiences, family effects, and my journey as a psychotherapist supporting Ontario and Alberta’s 911 community. Clinicians often face the question, “Do we get it?” There’s a notable difference between trauma-informed and trauma-trained approaches, especially when trained in versus lived experiences within this community.

As I near my tenth year in private practice, supporting first responders, public safety personnel, and their families, I bring a unique perspective from living with someone in uniform and marrying into generations of policing. Despite never wearing a uniform, my 12 years on the front lines taught me, “We do the same job ( policing), but there are two differences. You carry a weapon and wear a bulletproof vest into the unknown. I carry a notepad and pen into the unknown.” Years later, I realized that 911 families are often underrated and need a voice as much as those in uniform.

YESTERDAY’S POSTS:

- Proactive post: Shared what I wished I had and what I have been providing for our communities.
- Run post: Discussed movement as medicine, noting potential adaptations.
- Score post: Emphasized the body’s role in expressing unspoken issues.
- Storm post: Highlighted undiagnosed injuries’ impact on 911 members and families.
- Healing post: Addressed recovery’s non-linear nature and possible worsening symptoms before improvement.
- Growth and grief post: Explored systemic failures, government greed over legislative law (RIP C-211), and their impact on individuals, uniforms, and families.

These posts reflect my professional trauma-trained perspective and personal lived experiences. Mental health professionals’ vulnerabilities can strengthen therapeutic relationships. That’s where “ I get it”, comes from. Trauma-intensive, trauma focused clinicians navigate therapy with a unique lens, distinguishing them from trauma-informed therapists.

Support. Strength. Thrive. was launched in my tenth year, recognizing the need for a shift that to reduce su***de and substance use rates among first responders- Proactiveness is key to changing mental health trajectories for 911 members and families.

My drive as a clinician is fuelled by compassion, lived experiences, scholarly training, a mission, and a vision, leading to deeper conversations, community collaboration, healing, and growth.


As we peak in our healing and start connecting to growth, what happens to   on WSIB or on leave? How do their families c...
02/26/2026

As we peak in our healing and start connecting to growth, what happens to on WSIB or on leave?
How do their families cope? How does their connection to the service change?

In the 911 world, recovery stages can be as daunting as the calls they go to. Yet, when healing peaks, growth often follows. But this process raises questions about identity and loss. With growth, grief can set in. The uniform, the service, and the moral injury persist while the mental injury heals and transitions into growth.

Grief doesn’t progress through stages; it’s as non-linear as healing. Growth, like healing, has no timeline, unlike the managed timeline of an injury through WSIB.

Growth and grief are connected by an invisible thread. No one talks about their experiences, and if they do, it’s often accompanied by dark humour, ambivalence, ignorance, denial, and sometimes acceptance.

Growth shared the grief with my family as the months passed. When you feel on the path of growth, but grief unexpectedly knocks on the door, it can be overwhelming. The uniform becomes a memorial piece rather than a symbol of pride and joy.

Growth, with the tools you’ve acquired as a first responder and as a family, can either strengthen your bond or cause you to drift apart.

When you choose to stay together, the inner work continues, and you learn to grow into deeper understanding that even when the uniform is no longer present, you learn to live with the concept that you were a first responder and your training will always be something you treasure.

When mutual separation is underway, you learn that even when your partner is no longer in the same house, you begin building a new network outside of the uniform life.

Both spaces contain grief, and with it, grief is never linear. It doesn’t leave; it simply fades and coexists in your daily lives. That’s growth. It’s wholeness with acceptance of the broken toy. Mended through the run, the score, the storm, and healing.


Following the storm, pockets of learning emerged to create safety.This safety extended beyond physical parameters to enc...
02/26/2026

Following the storm, pockets of learning emerged to create safety.

This safety extended beyond physical parameters to encompass emotional, psychological, physiological and mental well-being.

Such spaces were not uncommon, but they represented transformative experiences that fostered understanding, exploration and emotional and trigger management.

The saying “healing is not linear” aptly describes the process. It was far from straightforward.

The saying “healing is messy, more so than the trauma itself” resonated deeply.

The healing process stretched over years, sometimes feeling like decades. There were moments of self-doubt and a strong desire to end it. Yes, the white towel was a constant presence.

However, something grounded us to persevere. Was it love? Was it sufficient? A fundamental change was necessary.

We discovered that each of us deserved a support care team, which included but wasn’t limited to, a doctor, psychiatrist, psychologist, occupational therapist, psychotherapist and peer / peer-to-peer support.

We rediscovered self-care, some of us learning it for the first time.

We established boundaries. Healthy boundaries.

We learned the nuances of tone and language.

We discovered safe words.

We learned to disengage.

We understood that time alone cannot heal wounds; rather, communication, effort, energy and safety are essential.

Trust became a cornerstone within safety. Even as we acknowledged our differences, the space of gratitude continued to grow. Growth was underway, and the new versions of ourselves with the injury and with each other was respected.

Nevertheless, questions persisted: “When in a state of growth, what happens to my identity as a ? Can I return to work? Is it possible that I may never be able to return?” , “Who can I trust at the service? Can I trust at all?” These feelings of healing into the process of growth can become heavy and grief starts settling in.


CONTENT WARNING: Workplace -Mental & Moral Injuries within 911A devastating, unforeseen and unwelcome, shattered our liv...
02/26/2026

CONTENT WARNING: Workplace -Mental & Moral Injuries within 911

A devastating, unforeseen and unwelcome, shattered our lives. Post-traumatic stress disorder descended upon us like a relentless storm, bringing with it a whirlwind of emotions.

The aftermath was terrifying fear, silence, and shame. The burden of guilt weighed heavily, and the sense of helplessness was overwhelming. The constant vigilance required to prevent further harm was exhausting, leaving us feeling trapped in a cycle of constant fear and vigilance .

The emotional toll was immense. Compassionate fatigue set in, secondary trauma emerged, and we were confronted with numerous triggers. The anger that arose from witnessing such devastation was palpable, and it became a source of internal conflict.

The demands of the job as first responders, trained to face the unknown and respond to emergencies, further exacerbated family life. The lack of time for debriefing and the constant need to protect and serve took precedence over our personal lives. Families became secondary, and the community became our primary focus.

The uniform, once a symbol of pride, became a constant reminder of the trauma endured. Yet, the reality was that no first responder should have to carry the weight of such experiences alone. This aspect of the job was not shared with members or families, leaving us to grapple with the trauma on our own.

As the storm intensified, we sought refuge in our separate corners, hoping to find safety. However, this isolation only fuelled resentment and created a sense of disconnection within our family. The blame for the trauma continued to grow, and it seemed as though we were trapped in a cycle of anger and frustration.

It took a mass destruction for help to arrive, and we had to exhaust every resource to find emotional shelter. The constant advocacy for our right to confront the trauma and receive the support we needed led to the creation of a label that provided a sense of direction and a path to healing. This healing journey was not what we had anticipated, but it did lead to unexpected outcomes that changed our lives forever.


When we are constantly on the go, we cannot comprehend the availability of pause.Everyone relies on us, and everyone exp...
02/26/2026

When we are constantly on the go, we cannot comprehend the availability of pause.

Everyone relies on us, and everyone expects great things from us.

However, endured trauma, whether through work or otherwise, can cause our bodies to keep a record of the things we never shared.

My body kept a record of decades of unresolved trauma.

Yet, what ultimately led me to my knees was not my childhood trauma, but my workplace before I entered private practice.

The impulsiveness, the GO attitude, the burst of reactiveness, the evasiveness, the ignoring, the excessive sharing, the gossip, the rumours, and the put-downs on public forms were all contributing factors.

My body gave in.

From not remembering a night out to experiencing ocular migraines (where you are blind at night), to having frozen parts of my body, to my PCOS on overdrive, my body kept a record of the hurt, the pain, the trauma, the bullying, the shame, the guilt, and the embarrassment.

All of it led to my body giving in and saying STOP!

I could no longer run.

I had no choice but to sit with the physical pain and ask myself, “WHAT” rather than “WHY.”

It was in these moments that I learned that our endured trauma is not about the reaction of the memories, but how we responded to them.

This score almost broke my family, while not fully being aware that within my family, their bodies were also keeping a record of their own trauma.

The score became a beast, and it was time to find ways to learn to find safe spaces to heal through.


Running, the lacing up, the pavement, the early risers, the weather, the heart rate, the feeling, the hitting the paveme...
02/26/2026

Running, the lacing up, the pavement, the early risers, the weather, the heart rate, the feeling, the hitting the pavement, the sweat, the tears, the exhaustion, the accomplishment—all these elements contributed to my life in profound ways. Running provided me with an outlet and a safe space. However, I now understand that my body will keep a record of what I did not release during this movement.

As life progressed, so did I age. While movement is medicine, learning to embrace pivoting and giving ourselves grace for what we could no longer do became essential. Pivot became the target in my fitness lifestyle.

It is acceptable to pivot and alter what no longer works. We must realign for ourselves, not for others.

As a former fitness instructor, the push and challenge were invigorating. However, I learned that my body is not the same as others. Perhaps they came to my class to escape the stressors of their jobs, their lives, to feel whole again, to ensure they were here for another day, or to not feel alone.

Every movement has a story, and every story is unique. Yet, no one should ever push the same movement for you.

Uniqueness is inherent in everyone. Find your uniqueness and drive that form of aliveness in whatever makes you feel alive, aligned, and whole again.

I miss my pavement days, but I am eternally grateful that the days I had hitting that ground were soulful.


Imagine, before a crisis, you had the tools.Imagine, before the  , you had tools.Imagine, before trauma responses, you h...
02/26/2026

Imagine, before a crisis, you had the tools.

Imagine, before the , you had tools.

Imagine, before trauma responses, you had tools.

Being proactive is a tool.

A tool that shares a potential.

A tool that shares insights.

A tool that shares education.

A tool that shares the “how to”.

A tool that shares, that regardless of your years on the job, you have a safe space to land even during any form of crisis.

In 2011, I wished I had tools before the crisis.

In 2004, I wished I had tools before the birth trauma.

In 2014, I wish I had tools to help me support my spouse in the world.

In 2021, I wish I had the tools that helped me understand that others’ anger was not my fault.

Proactive initiatives can significantly impact lives in various ways. They are not one-size-fits-all, but there are proactive programs that can meet individual needs.

In 2024, I created EMPOWERING LENS, a proactive mental health program for first responders, whether they are new recruits, in the middle of their careers or nearing the end. ( whether on WSIB, in maximum recovery or in retirement).

Many have followed suit and recognized the importance of proactive programs, particularly in the 911 field.

To learn more about EMPOWERING FIRST RESPONDER FAMILIES PEER SUPPORT, and EMPOWERING LENS, scan the QR code.


Address

Ottawa, ON

Opening Hours

Monday 8am - 8pm
Wednesday 8am - 8pm
Thursday 8am - 8pm
Saturday 9am - 3pm
Sunday 9am - 3pm

Telephone

+16139866737

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Parul Shah MSP, RSW

Parul Shah has over 20 years of experience in the Mental Health Field. Parul Shah is a privately owned Psychotherapist in the Ottawa area, focusing mainly on frontline personnel dealing with PTSD, anxiety, depression or anyone dealing with various traumas. The true understanding of frontline trauma often results either from self-experience or from living with someone who has a Mental Health Injury. Parul Shah continues to be a Clinical Support for A Peer Family based group called First Responders Family Resiliency Support Group Ottawa . She is also a Board Member for First Eyes, a Proactive Mental Health Program for Frontline and their families.

Parul Shah is also known for her public speaking and her daily inspiring posts and poems. Parul Shah has publicized a few of her poems over the span of 34 years.