10/29/2025
July 27, 2022, Nova made me a dog mom.🐶🫶
Yes, I made a "birth announcement" for our dog. I'm 'that' person. 🤣
This little girl who didn't stay little for long, good God, she represents so much to me... Too much to list but the biggest, most amazing thing about choosing this baby after a long year of being so insecure, unsure and afraid of this choice without everyone's support/approval and the fact that this baby becoming a member of our family was and is a powerful statement of; I can no longer sacrifice my desires/needs for someone else's comfort, approval or appreciation and secondly; my amazing love, Patrick, was this calm, constant presence reminding me that having a dog had been such a long time wait for me and that it's one of the things I wanted to experience before the end of my days.
Before Nova, my heart was repeatedly broken as we missed out on amazing dogs because I let my fears of what people would think get in the way of living my life for me and I waited too long so those pups went on to happy homes, that weren't ours, and it hurt. But underneath that was self-betrayal. By not choosing me, I abandoned myself over and over again.💔😢
But then there was Nova. The dog we did not waste time on and risk losing out on. She was ours. And we were hers.🩷🐾
What an incredible journey Nova has had on my way to living and loving life, on my terms, going after what I truly want... And even though every single person in our life made unsupportive comments at first, and going against people's expectations and approvals is one of my biggest personal struggles...like, the thought of not pleasing someone literally made me want to vomit... I loved this dog too much to give up or give in. 🥹
And in loving this dog, I was brought into the presence, into the reality that life is short; over time, I learned that I DO deserve love, joy and freedom. ✨
Nova is now 3.5 years old and continues to teach me unconditional love, patience, resilience and advocacy (for myself and her). She's a mastiff mix (scary looking breed, some would say), 95 lbs and a fearful, anxious girl around dogs and some people; all points 'against' her. Well, being a woman with disability, I know what its like to have odds stacked against you, to be judged by appearance and to not be given the sacred space to just be. In a way, when I stand up for my dog, I stand up for me. 💪
Nova, and everything that makes her who she is, is perfectly imperfect and she has taught me that, much like her, everything I am, is perfectly imperfect and this full, beautiful, messy life is a blessed one.🩷
When the student is ready, the teacher appears. Who or what is your teacher?
