Voth Family Therapy

05/24/2023

Do you ever wish your teenager had come with a manual?

Don't worry - you aren't alone.  Countless parents find themselves in my office scratching their heads and asking the same question: "How do I get them to talk to me?"  When I explore the issue a typical theme emerges: parents feel they're doing all the right things to set the stage for meaningful conversation with their teen, but nothing happens.  Questions are answered with the barest of information or the teen will address only 'light' topics and avoid anything with any depth, leaving the parent frustrated and feeling out-of-the-loop.  I find myself giving the same advice again and again...

📍 Learn What to Look For: In case you haven't already realized this, teenagers rarely approach their parents with the intention of initiating a conversation about 'the deep stuff', particularly teens who are struggling.  When they do, it isn't usually obvious that they have something on their mind that they'd like to share.  Some of the ways I see teens approaching adults when they need something: pick a fight, talk about something that seems meaningless (like music, or what so-and-so wore to school today), or by saying nothing but showing a lot of body language.  These approaches may be irritating and often don't make sense to adults, but they are bids for connection.  If you are seen as responsive and engaged with the 'fluff' of your teen's life, or you can tolerate some button-pushing without rejecting them, you'll be seen as someone who's safe enough to share the bigger issues with.  

Read more about talking with teens on our blog!
vothfamilytherapy.com/blog/talking-to-teens-101

04/14/2023

Good communication is part of the foundation in a healthy relationship. Within good communication is the art of listening, which helps to foster validation, build trust, and provide affirmation. 

Here’s some ways to bring the practice of listening into your conversations.

•Be curious and ask questions. Try thinking like a journalist - who, what, when, where, why? 

•Have an open mind. Good communication takes place in a safe space. Help create that safety by having an open mind and keeping any judgements to yourself.

•Use simple phrases to validate. Saying phrases, such as “Of course”, “That makes sense”, or “For sure!”, affirm someone’s experience or feelings. 

•Listen with your body. Use body language to be present in the conversation and notice their body language; there’s so much more to communication than what is being said. 

Listening takes practice! It’s often tempting to want to do something else like multitask, offer advice, or talk about your own experience. A great way to begin is by being present in the conversation with your mind and body.

If you’d like to connect with a therapist to talk about good communication and the art of listening, we’re here and happy to help.

12/06/2022

Ah, the holiday season.  Festive lights, smiling people, glowing firesides and all the images that a Bing Crosby album conjures up.  However cozy and quaint, this picture-perfect version of “the most wonderful time of the year” isn’t accurate for many for whom it might bring feelings of dread.

Often those who have suffered a loss, people who have had difficult holiday experiences in the past, introverts (*raises hand*), and those who have experienced trauma have a hard time.  They say, “I feel like the weird one,” or “No one understands why I feel the way I do.”  Many survive by faking it, forcing their way through the demands of the season, stumbling into January in a post-holiday depression with a desire to further withdraw from our lives and feeling sad, irritable or frustrated.  

If this is the real cost of the holidays, what can we do differently?

Stop faking it.  Be honest with yourself and those around you.  Your emotions are valid and they’re trying to communicate something important to you like, “This hurts!”.  If you burned your hand in the oven, would you force yourself to do it over and over again?

If your December isn’t merry and bright, the most healing gift you can give yourself is permission to feel as you do.

Read more about what we can do differently around the holidays if it isn't the most wonderful time of the year. Link in bio.

11/29/2022

Dealing with big changes can be a big challenge. Job change, graduation, loss, divorce, marriage, gender transition, diagnosis - any significant shift in life is going to come with changes that can leave you feeling unsettled, overwhelmed, or a bit lost. 

Acknowledge the mixed feelings. There’s going to be more than one emotion and often they’re even opposites, but there can still be space for each one. 

Identify what is lost and what is gained. Having an understanding of those mixed feelings can be helpful. 

Focus on what you can control. Bring movement into the day, get the little things done, take a few deep breaths. Ask yourself what it would look like to get through this and take a few minutes to write about that.  

Find some stability with the constants in your life. A same cup of coffee, a habit, this certainty can be super helpful when going through these changes.

If you're finding yourself going through a change and would like some support, we're here and happy to help.

11/15/2022

Meet Roy!

This playful kitten is ready or his forever home 😻

As Cat of the Week, Roy’s adoption fee this week is only $50. https://pvhsociety.ca/cats/ace

🚨 Voth Family Therapy Cat of the Week: Roy 🚨

Roy had a very tough start to his young life. He came into our care as a sick little boy, but after receiving treatment and spending some time in a loving foster home, he's back to tip-top shape! He's a very affectionate kitten, and is very playful and sweet. He loves to play with his foster siblings...especially his canine sibling's tail!

This week Roy's adoption fee is only $75, which includes his neuter, medical treatment (completed), and all age-appropriate vaccines and boosters. You also receive a complementary vet check after adoption to start your new family on the right foot. Learn more: https://pvhsociety.ca/cats/roy

11/08/2022

When do you feel most content?

Connect with that space and spend a moment there. ✨️

11/01/2022

Meet Ace!

Look at those whiskers! 😻

As Cat of the Week, Ace’s adoption fee this week is only $50. https://pvhsociety.ca/cats/ace

🚨 Voth Family Therapy Cat of the Week: Ace 🚨

Ace came into our care over seven weeks ago with his friend Molly. He’s a fan of people, cats, and snuggles (we don’t yet know how he would react to dogs). As we approach the cold months of winter, he’ll be the perfect companion to help keep you warm!

Ace’s adoption fee this week is only $50. Apply today! https://pvhsociety.ca/cats/ace

10/17/2022

Meet Winnie!

She's Pembina Valley Humane Society's Cat of the Week, sponsored by us cat lovers here at Voth Family Therapy.

😻

🚨 Voth Family Therapy Cat of the Week: Winnie Adopt Winnie for only $50! 🚨

Winnie has a long history with the PVHS…she first came into our care in 2018. She was adopted, but has found her way back to us. She is an interesting lady…a bit of a drama queen, very independent. She likes to rule her roost!

She’s been in foster, and they tell us that she can be affectionate when she wants to be 😂 If you’re looking for a companion for these coming cold winter nights, but don’t want a cat that’s too cloying, Winnie could be the right girl for you!

Learn more: https://pvhsociety.ca/cats/winnie

09/27/2022

Take a moment and share some compliments with yourself right now. Let those be thoughts that linger and the notes that get remembered.​​​​​​​​
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09/21/2022

This summer we came together to spend time sharing stories and striking poses for our photo session.

What you don't see in these photos is the sound of laughter in the background or the wonderful feeling of connecting that weaved its way through the evening.

Check out the new photos of our lovely team!