08/09/2021
We enjoyed a beautiful weekend camping at a nearby campground. Our daughter kayaked, they both played to their heart’s content on the playground, we biked more km’s that I expected (our daughter kept right up on her strider bike!). AND we got the kids to bed early enough for my husband and I to enjoy a couple of campfire evenings together just us. Despite all the activity, I found myself wide awake in the middle of the night on Saturday night. This has been happening a lot lately and I know that it has to do with my bodymind processing a lot of anger and grief. I know this because I know the Chinese Clock; the Liver is strongest from 1am-3am and the Lung is strongest from 3am-5am. I wake up either around 2am or around 3am and typically am up for 2 hours.
I was bummed when I was awake in the middle of the night because I wanted to be present for my family and actively participate in our adventures so I decided to do something besides just lay there and wait for the 2 hours to pass. I sat up in bed and I started my meditation practice. Besides the anger and grief, there was so much fear and I know that wherever there is fear, there cannot be love. I sat with the fear and felt it change until all of a sudden, I felt my heart space expand. Expansion doesn’t even give the feeling justice. My heart felt as large as the universe. Love displaced the fear. And then there were no more thoughts. I was a human BE-ing, embracing my being-ness.
And since I allowed the emotions to move through me, my body was able to rest and recharge for another amazing day ahead of us.