James A. Rutherford Funeral Home Ltd, 804 Ontario Street Unit C11, Stratford, ON (2025)

12/02/2025

DARLENE DELORES SMART
January 1936 - November 2025

Darlene Delores Smart, dearly loved by her family, neighbours, and friends, was called home to be with her beloved husband, and infant daughter, on Friday November 28, 2025 in Stratford, Ontario.

Darlene is survived by daughters Jennifer Reiger, Bernice Ridsdale (Dan), and son William Smart. Also surviving Darlene is former daughter in law Nancy Smart.

Darlene (Nana) is blessed to be survived by 10 grandchildren: Macrina and Anastasia Smart, Lesley Ridsdale (Ben), Jonathan Ridsdale (Liz and great granddaughter Lucy), Katie Ridsdale (Darren), Bradly Reiger (Laura), and Marcus, Daniel, Matthew, and Jessica.

She is predeceased by husband Glen William Smart (2013) and infant daughter Julie Ann Smart (1965), parents Clifford and Mabel Palmer, brothers Rodger Palmer (Sadie), and Jerry Palmer (Erma Clarke).

Darlene loved all things Stratford - the swans, the festival, and the friendly community, but she especially loved raising her family there. During the late 80’s, after providing childcare in the home for many other families, Darlene began working outside of the home where she thrived. Her weekends and holidays were happily enjoyed on Lake Huron at Kitchigami Camp with family and friends.

She will be deeply missed but leaves behind a legacy of resilience and grace for all who were blessed to know and spend time with her. Her perseverance and resiliency remained constant, combined with great love and caring from family and neighbours, which allowed her to overcome many challenges to remain in the family home, which was so very important to her.

Family and friends are invited to gather at the family home in Stratford on Saturday, December 6, 2025, from 1:00 - 3:00 pm in a celebration to remember and honour Darlene in the comfortable setting she so cherished. Interment at Avondale Cemetery at a later date.

As expressions of sympathy, memorial donations may be made to the Stratford Public Library (www.splibrary.ca/donate) directly, or through Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services (www.jarfh.com) 804 Ontario St., Stratford. 519-271-5062.

11/24/2025

DORIAN JOSEPH DWYER
April 1942 - November 2025

In his 83rd year, Dorian Joseph Dwyer died peacefully at his long-term care residence in Mitchell. Beloved husband of Patricia and father of Dorian (Tamara) and David (Bonnie).

Dorian and Patirica made Stratford their home for 59 years and raised their sons there after having moved from Niagara Falls with the Dominion Chain Company.

He leaves behind his sister Joan Mottola (Louis) of St. Mary’s, grandchildren: Amanda, Lauren, Tyler, Joshua, Nicole, and Kyle, and four great grandchildren. Dorian is predeceased by his brother Bill and parents William and Dorothy of Niagara Falls.

After retirement, Dorian spent many hours in his workshop, making carvings and pursuing his genealogy hobby, and both Dorian and Patricia shared their love with their pets.

A celebration of Dorian’s life will be held in Niagara Falls in the spring.

Donations in memory may be made to the Ontario SPCA (www.ontariospca.ca), the Stratford Perth Humane Society (kwsphumane.ca) or the Alzheimer Society (www.alzheimer.ca), directly or through Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services. 804 Ontario St., Stratford, ON. N5A 3K1. 519-271-5062.

11/24/2025

GORDON ROY HERBERT MOORE
October 1936 - November 2025

Gordon Moore, born on October 9, 1936, passed away peacefully on November 19, 2025 surrounded by his loving family. He had a brief illness; however, he left without pain and with the same gentle grace that guided his long and wonderful life.

Gordon was known for his warm humour and his love of telling jokes. He brought laughter to every room and made people feel welcome with his easygoing spirit. He was preceded in passing by his beloved wife Connie in the year 2019, as well as eight siblings.

He is survived by two sisters, Joyce Hutchison and Marion Chappell.
Gordon is also survived by his sons Roy and Gordon Moore (Monika), and by his daughters Shirley Moore and Loraine Diehl. He was a proud grandfather to Christopher Moore (Dawna), Chantel Ruth (Daniel), Kassandra, and Justin Moore, Amanda Elieff (Justin), and Brittany Quehl (Adam). He leaves six loving great grandchildren.

Gordon lived kindly, loved deeply, and brought joy to all who knew him. His memory will continue to brighten the lives of those he leaves behind.

A Celebration of Life will be held on December 6, 2025 from 2-4 pm at the Army/Navy/AirForce, located at 151 Lorne Avenue in Stratford. All who loved him are warmly welcomed to join in honouring his memory. He would have truly appreciated having everyone together to celebrate his life.

Arrangements entrusted to Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services. 519-271-5062.

11/23/2025

FICTIONS

For someone such as me, in a profession such as I am – there are often numerous scenarios that provide reason to pause. At the best of times, I’m inclined to do so anyway and take in the moment, but some can only imagine the potential for that pause in funeral service.

When I was working in Toronto, there were a number of funeral homes that provided their services for what was called “coroner’s calls” – calls that came in from the police or a coroner, to obtain someone who had died and transfer them to the pathology unit of such-and-such hospital, or the office of the Chief Coroner.

Inevitably they were suicides, homicides or accidents. These people were nameless strangers to me. The calls were deliberately short of information and often all I knew was the location for pickup and the location for drop-off. On these calls you brought along such things as scissors, straps, masks, a hazmat suit and rubber boots, just in case. I think you get the idea. These calls did not mean that it was the funeral home you worked in that was even the one chosen to provide any service beyond the transfer you were called to do. It was the antithesis of what it is that makes me satisfied in my work – serving folks who I get to know a little about and share with through the commonality of understanding their emotion. In a word... a shared empathy.

But certainly, coroner’s calls had their merit for one inclined to reflect. It was through them that I dwelled amongst lives I could not imagine – finding mostly the one commonality highlighted – our fragility. It was largely those coroner’s calls where a certain fearlessness was cemented. Every individual’s situation and the worlds façades became thin. I began to see folks as walking upon the precipice of their comfortable and/or dangerous lives and perhaps not realizing just how close they were to potentially playing out different outcomes. The boundaries of our lives became blurred.

While I am most privileged to make things easier for families and friends and provide some solace through my work, the coroner’s calls illustrated their fictions for me to read in any way I chose. I have seen hangings, overdoses, gunshots, jumpers and burn victims, among other things – and I completely understand when folks ask me about those scenarios because they too have their fictions running in their heads – to better understand what sometimes is beyond their understanding.

And inevitably, when I arrived at any scene that wasn’t an accident, I found myself wishing that I could have talked to those now dead, before this thing happened. I played at having been able to help them overcome their addiction, to show them that loving someone does not tie into dying for someone, that taking their lives in the way they have was unnecessary – because I would have convinced them not to. How arrogant of me. What do I know of their experience in these worlds where something like this could happen? My expertise comes through in the myriad number of discussions I’ve had with those who have loved, experienced a death, and are left alive. That’s where I live.

What these people have all too profoundly shown me though, is that there is almost always someone left in shock and nursing a broken heart. Or is that projection? There must have been somebody who knew them, somebody who might have saved them. And yes, sometimes that would be the one weeping on the sidelines as I zip up the bag. The one being propped up in shock by the police officer. The one sitting on the curb with their face in their hands or the family sitting stone-faced in the kitchen, unable to comprehend.

I try to hold up the universal aspects of love, compassion, friendship, humanitarianism and spirituality – things that can be given from the open hand and the open heart. Nothing need be done but that, to benefit in the giving. These attributes do not ask the question: who is worthy? They don’t ask: through what belief, through what action makes these people qualified to receive love? When it is in us to give regardless. Dormant sometimes, but there.

I want to believe in the power of love, but I know that the fuel and the spark of it so often starts with empathy. That’s where the real power resides. Empathy – the soil. Love – the flower. They are the two essentials for a sense of belonging. Yet all too often I’m left with the feeling that love and empathy didn’t do their job. And yes, I realize, it’s not always like that. Love and empathy haven’t failed human beings, sometimes it’s the other way around – human beings have failed them – because we, confused, fragile and self-centred angels that we are, didn’t recognize them within ourselves.

UNTIL SOON. LIVE WELL.

11/18/2025

There might be a few questions that you would like answered at some time…

ON WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 26th, GET YOUR ANSWERS!

SLAAA (Stratford Lakeside Active Adults Association) is holding an information session with Funeral Director and end-of-life educator Stuart Lender from 12:30 – 2:00 pm in the Community Hall of the Stratford Rotary Complex.

PRINTED INFORMATION IS AVAILABLE.

ANSWERS TO:
What are the answers I need to know for the funeral home paperwork when someone dies? How can I make things as easy as possible for my family? What are the options for my TFSA when I die? What are the ways I can keep costs down and make my funeral more affordable for my family? What happens when someone dies in a hospital? In a hospice? In a long-term care facility? At their residence? What are the three types of wills that are recognized in the Province of Ontario and what are the pros and cons of each? How do I read a funeral home contract? How in control am I? What are the two types of prearrangements I can make and how do they work? Why is it a good idea to prearrange my wishes? What is aquamation and how does it work? What are the benefits of doing an aquamation and what are the benefits of doing a cremation? What do I need to update at the cemetery regarding my burial? What are the costs for purchasing a plot? A niche? What are the costs to be paid when someone dies and is buried? What is the procedure for obtaining permission for MAiD? How is MAiD done? What are the safeguards in carrying it out? What is probate? Is it necessary for my estate? What are the rules? How and why would I donate my body and for how long? Can my family still have my remains after the time period is up? What is the cost for body donation and is it the same thing as organ donation? What is a “Death Doula” and what do they do? What should I know to make my own end-of-life decisions? What are some of the myths and truths about funeral service that I’ve heard concerning costs, urns, vaults, aquamation, obituaries, caskets, etc… What does the funeral home do for me regarding paperwork and what is it that I have to do?

11/16/2025

ANNETTE YVONNE MARIE BEAUDET
September 1943 - November 2025

It is with heavy hearts that we announce the passing of our beloved mother, grandmother, sister, and friend on November 14, 2025, at 3:22 p.m. Her final days were filled with love, laughter, and cherished memories shared with the family and friends who gathered at the Rotary Hospice Stratford. We are deeply grateful to the hospice staff for their warmth, compassion, and care during this time.

Those last precious days were filled with stories, my mom’s stories, told with her signature wit and wisdom. They carried us on a heartfelt and often humorous journey down memory lane, weaving together new tales with familiar ones and adding depth to the tapestry of her beautiful life.

When I reflect on my mom’s life, I find solace in the simple yet profound moments we shared, especially the times we held hands. Her hands were like soft pillows, comforting and familiar, from my childhood through adulthood. Whether she was walking me down the aisle or supporting me through the births of my children, her touch was always an anchor. I remember gripping her hand so tightly during one birth that her ring left an imprint on her palm. I apologized, but she simply brushed it off, reminding me that her focus was on me.

In her final week, Mom and I created a mold of our hands together. That sculpture has become a treasured focal point in my home, a tangible reminder of our unbreakable bond. It stands as a symbol of her loving spirit, her unwavering care, and the connection only a mother and daughter can share.

That was my mom, loving and selfless, always putting others before herself. I will forever cherish our morning coffee rituals and the simple joy of watching squirrels dart across the backyard. And the last moment I held her hand at 3:22 p.m - that day is etched deeply into my heart, a memory I will carry with me always.

I miss you already, Mom. You are loved beyond words, and your spirit will continue to guide and inspire us every day.

Should you wish to honour her memory – donations are being gratefully accepted to the Rotary Hospice Stratford Perth (www.rotaryhospice.ca) directly, or through Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services. 804 )ntario St., Stratford, ON. N5A 3K1. 519-271-5062.

11/12/2025

AMANDA LYNNE ORCHARD
November 1979 - November 2025

Amanda Orchard passed away peacefully at Stratford Perth Rotary Hospice, in Stratford, Ontario on November 6, 2025 at the age of 46.

Mom, (Amanda), will forever be remembered for her kindness and her lovely habitual handwritten notes. Furthermore – for her 'Pollyanna' optimism, her bird feeder half-full mentality, and her inspiring and unforgettable Snow-White charm.

Loved deeply by her three daughters, spouse, mother, father, brothers, sisters and friends. Also, the horses, cats, dogs, rabbits and all the other furry and feathered friends she so readily welcomed into her home and heart – so full of love, and yet always room for one more.

May her soul, enriched by the lessons of this lifetime, and the good karma she built, guide her to a joyful and prosperous new beginning.

Donations in honour of her goodness may be extended to the Rotary Hospice Stratford Perth (www.rotary hospice.ca) directly, or through Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services. 804 Ontario St., Stratford, ON. N5A 3K1. 519-271-5062.

11/11/2025

BRENDA JOANNE STOCK
July 1963 - November 2025

Brenda Joanne Stock (Patient), passed away suddenly at Victoria Hospital in London, Ontario, on Friday, November 7, 2025 at the age of 62.

Born in Stratford, daughter of the late Thomas Patient and Nancy Struke, Brenda is the loving Mother of Brent and Victoria Stock. She is also survived by brother Doug Patient (Dianne), Aunt Marjorie Tyrie, Nephew Chris Patient (Karen), Niece Leslie Young (Scott), as well as cousins and great nieces and nephews.

Brenda was very creative and had a special talent for cooking and baking which she did both professionally and socially. In her early 40’s, Brenda returned to college where she studied Social Services. After college she worked briefly as a support worker for women.

Cremation has taken place and there will be no public funeral service as per Brenda’s wishes. A private Celebration of Life is planned for a future date.

Memorial Donations would be greatly appreciated and may be made to the Heart and Stroke Foundation (www.heartandstroke.ca), the London Health Sciences Centre (www.lhsc.on.ca) or a charity of one’s choice, directly, or through Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services. 804 Ontario St., Stratford, ON. 519-271-5062.

11/07/2025

ANNA

There are five songs that trigger tears for me, as soon as the first few notes enter my ears. Like Pavlov’s experiment with dogs that salivate as soon as they hear the bell that they’ve been trained signifies food, these songs trigger the water behind my eyes to bubble up and begin to flow and take me right into the heart of gratitude – for all of the songs are associated with profound parental experiences in my life. I admit it freely – I have entered the space of fatherhood where, despite her upcoming 25th birthday in December, I am more and more aware that my daughter will now and forever be “my little girl.”

Life goes on and at the most opportune times Anna jokes with her mom (my dear first wife, thoughts of whom will always hold a deeper meaning for me than she might ever realize) – just how easy it is to make daddy cry. And just as she requests I not speak to everyone in the café when we go in for a coffee or lose myself in the bookstore for an hour or two, it’s clear that she knows me well – particularly when she casually clicks on any one of those songs on her phone as we are driving somewhere together, testing me to see if the tears will come, proving to herself that it will work every time! Except then, it all ends in tearful laughter.

But there is something my daughter will never know that I know, about me and about herself. Something she will never comprehend in its entirety, just as I could never understand it about myself when I was the object of a grateful parent’s tear. It is the most unsettling element connected to the gratitude of a parent, and it might become tugged at and trigger tears like those songs. And that element is the parents' understanding of the mortality of their child.

As a funeral director I have served many who have found their arms unfulfilled, empty of the hugs they so desperately wish they could feel “just once more.” I have turned their grief upon myself, lamented for them and prayed silently that this thing, this tragedy, never happen to “my little girl.” Of course, I know that she will one day die, and even that to a parent, is tragic to contemplate no matter what age. But please, I pray you… do not die before me. I cannot assimilate it, despite my job. And here I am, serving those who know – my throat choking back any words that won’t help anyway.

It is a humbling endeavor. A feeling of uselessness, no matter what one is doing for those with a hole where the heart should be. And from the child’s perspective, it is virtually impossible for them to comprehend how much love a parent can hold, until perhaps they are one themselves. It is not a greater love than any other, or a superior love to another – just different, with, I would say… a lot more hope, a lot more concern attached to it. Putting myself into other people’s scenarios is a hazard of the job and an equally valuable gift in recognizing our shared humanity, the fragility of life, and the gifts that are given. At the loss of a child, it is a cruel reminder too, of so many things beyond our control.

Of course, when I’m open and observant, I recognize just how much my daughter is giving in return for that love I feel, and I don’t mean just love in return. It’s not devotion necessarily, or hugs and kisses. No – it’s lessons in the manner in which she grows into womanhood. Lessons in new ways to view my own childhood. Lessons in new ways of seeing. Lessons through having nurtured her to become someone other than me. And lessons from her to move beyond what I find myself to be.

This love is like nothing I have ever known. It has changed my life as it must, and yes – I want to leave my life before she leaves it. I want what we all feel is the natural order of things. But for those who find themselves in the opposite position, of which there are many, too many to shed tears with – I stand before them, my mouth hanging open, silent and amazed at the fact that they even managed to call me at all. And all I want is to recognize their hurt in some way that makes a difference for them, to alleviate the weight. And I want to whisper what they want to hear just once more, in their child’s voice. But at those times, I stand mute… and think of Anna.

UNTIL SOON. LIVE WELL.

11/04/2025

Another beauty:
Thank you kindly for recognizing our work and that we are a full service space. Many folks are unaware of that. Bless.

I cannot say enough good things about Stuart Lender, the Funeral Director at James A Funeral Home in Stratford Ontario. A kind, compassionate and patient human being that took care of both my mom and dad almost a year apart. He is extremely competent at his role and I would highly recommend this funeral home should the need arise for anyone requiring these type of services. he not only arranged for the burial and all the activities associated with that, but also took care of all the after the fact paperwork services like the CPP death benefit, cancelling of various services like OHIP, etc. Basically, a full beginning to end service provider, but with a individual, personal feel and approach versus a corporate turn key operation. Each situation is different, and Stuart has the capability and capacity to masterfully manage each scenario. He listens in a calm and patient manner taking the time to explain the process and the options available. Bottom line is that I trust Stuart completely to manage our family's needs and I was so grateful in his approach with my dad's passing that I did not hesitate to engage his services for my mother's passing. Thank you to Stuart and Rutherford's for their excellent and compassionate work in our time of grieving.
-Jim Jung

10/23/2025

THERE IS A FIELD

These words are born of thinking alone – surely. I am sitting in a cafe. I am writing about helplessness and rage, because I’ve felt them lately. I’m not feeling them now, however. I’m able to think about them rationally. They are often bedfellows, they are often born of each other, and they are often misguided. But right now – I'm thinking about them, I’m not “in” them.

When I feel either one, rare as it is, I am not in control – and I can clearly see that – stemming from helplessness is a profound weakness, a feeling of having no purpose or recourse. It’s tangible. And stemming from rage – an insult that smothers all senses, a blinding heat, and much later – a regrettable afterbirth.

Between these two extremes of human alienation – we act.

At a young age I developed a strong sense that being out of control was “uncool.” Definition: helplessness and rage. I default to a memory I have of a drunken man in a restaurant who shook my impressionably warm cocoon of privileged youth into a different reality by falling across a table and spreading it and himself throughout the room in a mess of glass and pasta! And a too young friend who overdosed and died for reasons of which, to this day, I am still unaware. In the first instance, I was ten years old. In the second, fifteen. Needless to say, these things sprouted the first real sense of a helplessness I was completely unprepared for. There were others as I grew. Up until then, I always felt secure and protected through parents who loved me and a home that was a refuge.

Rage blossomed later – in university, trying to understand the bias and bigotry of the world. That one has sadly returned in a big way lately, causing me to pause and re-group and scratch the inner workings of the mind for the same reasons to these injustices I tried hard to understand back then. The reasons being: fear, pursuit of wealth and power, and being unable to love oneself without thinking someone else holds a lower card.

Those old reasons are in abundance today, and after the country-wide protest of “no kings” recently past in October of 2025, I draw solace from the steely determination of our brothers and sisters to the south. And yes – despite the differences, they are our brothers and sisters none-the-less. The seven million people who, despite being filled with justifiable rage, expressed themselves through peaceful determination. Those who, instead of washing themselves in the helter-skelter of bloodlust, morphed their rage, their desire for justice, into a descending cascade of water – a cooling rain in a single slicing sheet of moral solidarity.

Helplessness and rage indeed – dangerous bedfellows. Birthing each other. But when in possession of a moral truth under our control, there is magnificence – the shining out of the best of humanity: Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa, Eleanor Roosevelt, Susan B. Anthony, Viola Desmond, Rosa Parks, Harriet Tubman, Nelson Mandela...

As loving and frail and fearful and bold as humans are – those challengers for a more inclusive and loving destiny are us and we may be them. There is a gate that opens to the superiority of our soul and spirit and not the baser instincts of our human predicament, and we are the keepers of that gate. Rumi, the 13th century poet and mystic knew, even then, that there is a field of universal humanity, and when the soul lies down in that green grass, as he wrote – the world is understood and simply too full and vibrant to talk about.

UNTIL SOON. LIVE WELL.

10/22/2025

GAIL BOWRA

It is with great sadness that we share the passing of Gail, age 86, beloved Mother, Nana and Great Nana, who left us peacefully on October 3rd, 2025 at the Stratford Rotary Hospice, surrounded by loved ones.

Born in Benmiller, ON to the late Keith and Margaret Gardner, Gail grew up on a small farm where she grew an appreciation for the outdoors. Graduating with honours at Goderich High School, she continued on to Teachers College in Stratford, eventually earning her BA at UWO. Gail started her passionate teaching career in a one-room schoolhouse in the Stratford countryside moving on to Hamlet Public School where she made a positive impact on generations of students. Following her retirement, she enjoyed travel and volunteering for the cancer society driving many to their appointments.

Gail is survived by her son Britt Bowra (Susan Ge**er), and their children Kent (Sarah), Andrea (Tory), and Adrienne (Alex); and Deb's children Nelson, Dominique, and Taylore (Ryan). She was predeceased by her husband Bill Bowra (1964), husband Bernie Houston (2003), and daughter Deb Bushfield (2011).

Gail was a person of wit and humour, strength and resilience, with a flair for good style and bold colour. She was well known for her presence on the golf course and being an avid golf, Leafs and Jays fan. She truly cherished spending as much time as possible with her family and friends. She was blessed with three great grandbabies Lenni, Beau and Libby who she simply adored. She had a love for nature's greenery and would frequently walk in the Old Grove where a bench in her honour has been placed. She will be deeply missed.

The family extends heartfelt thanks to the compassionate staff at Stratford General Hospital and the Stratford Rotary Hospice for their care and comfort during Gail's final weeks.

A celebration of life will take place at The Stratford Country Club on Nov 16, 2025 from 5:30-8:30 pm. Family and friends are invited to attend and share memories.

In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to the Stratford Rotary Hospice (www.rotaryhospice.ca) or Wellspring Stratford (www.wellspring.ca) in Gail's honour. Donations may be made directly or through Rutherford Cremation & Funeral Services. 804 Ontario St., Stratford. 519-271-5062.

James A. Rutherford Funeral Home Ltd

12/02/2025

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