12/11/2025
Now please don't get me wrong- I do not say this to guilt or shame ANYONE. I am very grateful for the wonderful people and support around me. But what I found astounding was that I was SHOCKED when last week, not one but two people asked me how I was doing following my mom's passing. Going through the days, weeks, months and years after a major event as if it is in the 'past' is something I have personally grown accustomed to, after years and years of care. Yet this is also something I have noticed, not only in my own losses, but in the losses of my clients, patients, friends and community.
At the time of a death or a diagnosis or a major event, the flood gates open- people show up, you are held. Yet after several months, the dust settles and the vast majority move on. We live in a very fast paced society, one with constant stimulation and new news every day. A society which perceives grief, no matter what the loss, as fleeting. But if you know someone who has lost someone in the past few months, year, 2 years, 3 years.. my money is on the fact that they are still grieving.
And I also do not say this to open the floodgates to be asked if I am 'ok' (please don't, that is not the purpose to this post). But to raise awareness of the experiences of others.
Sometimes it does make all the difference to be recognized in loss and pain, even a few months after a loss or major diagnosis or event.
So if you can think of someone in your life who has experienced a recent major event or loss- let them know you're still thinking of them. It makes a WORLD of a difference.
