12/23/2025
I promised more reflections around my personal advent calendar. Some are to be cherished and nurtured in private, hence the delay, but here is a big lesson for me that I can share.
āØGiving & Receiving āØ
Gifts are my love language. Always have been. I love collecting ādataā on what is needed and desired amongst my loved ones and surprising them with a gift when they least expect it.
However, I was never good at receiving. Despite gifting being such an important part of my relationships, i never felt comfortable opening & receiving gifts myself.
The first time I received a gift from my boyfriend at the time, I hid in the bathroom as I couldnāt bear to be seen opening a gift box.
My first Christmas in Canada was a huge deal with days of gift exchanges, get-togethers and celebrations. I couldnāt enjoy any of it. I was obsessively rehearsing my reactions to receiving gifts. Believe it or not, I was making sure everyone felt my gratitude, but I myself couldnāt allow the thought, the love or care behind the gift to land in my heart.
Perhaps, secretly I believed this was my super power. Wishing for nothing. Ha.
Years ago, I was doing one of the trainings with my teacher Rod Stryker. The message that came through was āin order to transcend a desire, you have to have a desire.ā
It became obvious that I had skipped half of the journey. š¤ gotta love yoga.
So there I was, sheepishly navigating the energy of the second chakra, what do I want? What do I want? Why do I dismiss it?
The thought of denial of the fulfillment of my deep, cherished desires was debilitating. I couldnāt even imagine it.
It took a long time, slowly giving voice to those whispers that wanted, that were excited by things, situations and experiences for no reason other than just becauseā¦
The recent closing of the teachers training, Mulaversary and Xmas holidays reminded me of how far Iāve come.
I receive with an open heart now.
I cherish the thoughts, the effort, the love and care behind each card, gift or a hug.
The energy flows in both directions. Being able to receive freely, made me a better giver as well.
Be present. Be open. Root yourself in love. After all, itās all about connection.
ā¤ļøš