12/19/2019
The stress and heartache of infertility tends to be more difficult this time of the year. It is especially hard for couples seeing other family members with children and friends who are pregnant during the holiday season. Sometimes you can’t help but ask "why me?” Unfortunately, pressure from family and curiosity from friends and colleagues usually make matters worse. This holiday season, let’s be mindful of what we ask and how we express our curiosities. Here are some questions you might consider avoiding:
👉 Are you pregnant yet? Don’t bring it up if your friend or family member doesn’t. This can be a sensitive topic for those who are trying to conceive. They will bring it up when the timing is right for them.
👉 Do you think your weight is affecting your fertility or do you think your lifestyle is affecting your fertility? If a couple is trying to conceive, chances are they have sought out or are seeking help. Let the professionals address this.
👉 Complain about your own pregnancy or children: this is not a question, but something that can really trigger negative emotions in couples who are longing for that positive pregnancy test. If you’re not sure what not to talk about, avoid topics about fertility, children, and pregnancy altogether.
👉 Is the issue with you or your partner? A lot of infertility cases are unexplained, some due to the male partner, some due to the female partner, and some do to both. Knowing who the issue is with should not be a concern of yours unless the couple is willing to share that information.
👉 You already have a child, why stress about having another one? Everyone has different family goals. Some couples may choose to have more than one and not being able to have more children can be devastating. The experience of secondary infertility can be just as difficult as those who are trying to conceive for their first child.
As a general rule of thumb, don’t bring it up if the couple doesn’t. Always be mindful and empathetic. Put yourself in the couple’s shoes and be understanding of the hardship the individual or couple may be going through. Everyone deserves a happy holiday. 📷 |
