What are the opening hours?

Tuesday 10am - 6pm Wednesday 10am - 6pm Thursday 10am - 6pm Friday 10am - 6pm

MindFul Space Counselling

Home
Canada
Vancouver, BC
MindFul Space Counselling

Welcome to MindFul Space Counselling
A place for you to heal, grow and connect. Our mission is to s It is often in relationship we sustain "injury" - get hurt.

At MindFul Space we bring a fusion of eastern philosophy & western psychology to help Individuals, Couples and Families move towards happiness, balance and fulfillment. We strongly believe in the proven benefits of Meditation and MindFulness techniques and bring these principals in an integrative counselling approach along with evidence-based therapies. Our goal is to make the Benefits of Meditation assessable to all in a supportive, respectful and caring way. My belief is that we also heal in relationship. When relationships provide the conditions that offer this healing environment - it is radically transforming & liberating. As a counsellor my single goal is to provide this healing relationship to my clients.

02/14/2023

A loving relationship is really a reflection on how effectively we know and are able to execute self love!

Think of raising a child. Everything that a child needs - positive attention, love, physical wellbeing, affection, devotion, support - the loving and caring presence of a present and available mature adult…these are fundamental human needs.

Chances are many of us have not received “all” of what we needed as a child, so learnt to go “without”. Effectively this going “without” is an unloving act towards oneself.

As we learn to love ourselves wholly, the natural order of things is that we will become more loving and compassionate in all areas.

Happy Valentine's Day!
💜

08/22/2022

Knowing our partner reduces conflict!

The better we know our partner the more understanding we can have around who they are and why they do certain things.

At the root of most relationship conflicts is a lack of knowledge, understanding and compassion.

When we really take the effort and time to get to know our partner deeply we start seeing them in their whole and in their context. Things start to make sense and the opportunity to see that most of the time what is happening is not a personal attack but a call to be seen and heard.

Next time there is a disagreement or things start to escalate ask yourself what can I learn/remember about my partner in this situation?

Conflict can be turned on its head with a little personal detachment and lots of open curiosity.

Conflict is really an ask/plee or longing to be known!

Lets raise the bar and not get stucked into a downward spiral.
Together we can spiral up!

04/16/2022

Emotional intelligence is so important in intimate relationships.

Without it harm and hurt keep happening. With it healing and growth thrive.

Emotional intelligence does not come with age or with status or any titles.

It comes with the “right” conditions.

And those right conditions are a safe environment…that is an emotionally safe environment.

Ideally these “right” conditions/safe environment would happen in our formative years.

As is the story for most, an emotionally safe environment did not happen in our childhood and we grew up sustaining many emotional wounds with no or little healing or help.

This sets the stage for emotional immaturity.

For many it is too painful to revisit those wounds so walls/defences/character styles/personality traits get built/adopted which keep one stuck in their immaturity.

Change is hard! BUT totally possible.

With commitment and practice one can learn, heal, grow and emotionally develop.

This is what I call evolving. We are not stuck with what we were given or have.

The power to change is all ours!

04/09/2022

Sound familiar... you are talking with your partner about something seemingly mundane and the next moment you are arguing and you start feeling upset, angry or frustrated?

Or in another incident - talking about a way forward or plan - then past events are brought up and derail the conversation and you feel blindsided, stuck and annoyed?

In most cases these types of conversation are stressful and create emotional turmoil and suffering.

Noticing and being aware of our own reactions (and how they change) during a conversation is very helpful in trying to avoid harm and hurting those we love.

It is common to reach a point in a conversation where one's internal emotions are so strong that it is hindering the conversation moving forward in a positive way.

At this point taking a break - aka - removing yourself from the conversation is the best move to make.

Taking a break is about allowing oneself the space to calm and self regulate so that the chance of a productive conversation can return.

Taking a break is not Failure! It is a mature, responsible. loving act of kindness to ourselves and the ones around us.

What I have experienced in most cases is that NOT taking a break has resulted in more harm, hurt, distance and disconnection which is more to untangle, repair and rebuild. Although this is totally possible and when done skillfully has great rewards - it is always optimal to avoid hurt.

03/21/2022

There are words that are totally not useful to say to your partner. So in these cases the skill of biting your tongue is needed!

Somehow we get into the mindset that pointing out all our partners flaws is the magic trick/strategy to bring about positive change. Then when it doesn’t work or creates more negativity we just keep going….or try again at a later date!

This makes me laugh as I have certainly done that - and sometimes catch myself there again. Boy it is so tempting sometimes!

In my experience, research and training there is a better way that is positive and totally gets your point across in a more truthful and accurate way.

That way is … to look inside!
(except when there is abuse, control or manipulation)

When your partner is doing something that you don’t like - that is a subjective preference.

So how we would open a conversation like that would be to say:

I feel….
About…..
And really what I am looking for is this….(your positive need)
Would you be able to do it this way….(turn your need into a positive request)
And I really appreciate this about you … (keep in mind this is someone you love and want to be with)
Thank you for hearing me out…
I would love to know your thoughts on what was said….

03/20/2022

Our future is made up of a culmination of moments. Meaning in every present moment we are creating our future.

Wow what power we have!

This is also true for our relationships.

Our relationship moments are creating our relationship future.

How we show up moment by moment matters.

Small positive things done often add up and are more impactful than grand gestures done periodically.

Adding/inserting into our relationships small positive additions is a great way to build accumulative positivity and keep the positive vibe/spirit between a couple.

One of these positive additions could be:

Adding a goodbye or greeting ritual with your partner - something unique and special to you both.

For example:

“Sandi & John” - on returning from a day at work/or being apart and seeing each other for the first time - *Greet each other with a lingering eye gaze,
*A smile - which seems to say so happy to be reconnected with you.
*Then an embrace and a lingering kiss.
*Followed by - a quick check in - where they use a cute analogy of a traffic light - green means feeling great, orange is so-so and red is not so great.

All while two little ones are running around.

Both start the family evening routine from this place and add/squeeze in cheeky moments of connection in between the kids.

Small positives like a smile, a loving gaze, a kiss, a hug take only seconds - these are the small things that really do make a difference.

02/25/2022

When conversations start to escalate in a negative way, stress - physical, mental and emotional are experienced by both which has significant health impacts.

The signs of stress happening include but are not limited too: increased heart rate, fight or flight responses, defensiveness and/or shutting down, withdrawing, losing control of one's words and actions. Feeling the need to justify and defend oneself, get even, blame.

Couples who are effective at deescalating negativity - meaning stopping it before it goes too far - or in the very early stages - report happier, more satisfying relationships.

Some ways these couples deescalate is through humour, taking personal responsibility - owing and identifying their parts, appreciation, fondness.

Some of the things I have heard said or done - in the heat of the moment - that couples naturally did to bring things down are below:

“Are those new shoes?...(response yes…) Oh I really like them - they would go well with that dress you wanted to wear to that dinner”

One couple pulled a funny face - that always made the other laugh and worked.

“You know I really want to tell you how much I appreciate all you do - I am just now realizing how little I say and acknowledge that. I really appreciate you bringing this to me and I want to hear all you have to say”.

“Here let me get you a cuppa tea and we can sit and talk about this”.

Talking ahead of time by asking our partner what they would respond well to - offering some thoughtful suggestions and checking that out will help with the success in the moment.

02/14/2022

❤️💜🧡 ✨Happy Valentines Day✨ 💜❤️🧡

Research tells us that those in happy, satisfying relationships “know” (and like) their partner very well and keep getting to know their partner on a daily basis.

I have below my top valentines ideas:

1. The Gift of Appreciation

Express or write down 5-10 things you appreciate about your partner with at least one specific example.Express or write down 5-10 things you appreciate about your partner with at least one specific example and give it to them. It is not enough to think appreciative thoughts - to truly get the benefits these need to be relayed to your partner in a way they can accept.

2. The Gift of Fondness

Remember what your partner's love language is or something you know that they really love you doing and write a "voucher" for that and give it to them. A way of showing that you notice what they like and there happiness is important to you.

3. The Gift of Curiosity

Pick something you and your partner disagree on (something not too heated) and invite your partner to share their perspective and really only listen (& take notes). Ask why this is important to them, find out the back story if there is one, how they feel about this, what they need, how this relates to their values/beliefs..
Get to know your partner on a deeper level!

4. Initiate A Conversation About S*x.

Ask your partner:
- How can I help you to feel safer during intimacy with me?
- Is there anything you would like to try sexually that we haven't already talked about?
- Do you think we have a difference in desire? How do you think we can handle that?
Really listen to the answers in a curious and open way. This doesn’t mean you are agreeing. You want to create a safe environment so that your partner can open up to you. Open ended questions and validating one's position/thoughts or feelings helps create safety.

It is small positive things over time - accumulated that lead to lasting, romantic, happy relationships, more than the grand gestures.

.

02/13/2022

Level 3 in the Gottmans Method of Couples Therapy

02/11/2022

Completed! Excited to start offering workshops!

01/28/2022

Talking about our feelings is a vulnerable thing to do.

It is exposing to another what is going on inside.

Often this feels scary which is actually a good sign which shows we are truly sharing and opening up and being vulnerable.

What I often hear is feeling words like - “I feel she/he doesn't listen” or “I feel that was wrong/right” or “I feel if only this happened…”. These statements are NOT feelings. Just because you put the word “I feel” infront does not make it a feeling.

Part of our work in couples therapy is to educate couples on what feelings are - including expanding eachs feeling vocabulary, then how to identify and name their own feelings and then how to communicate that to their partners.

A wonderful tool I use is the feeling wheel.

I would be happy to share this with any of you wonderful people.

To access your own FREE personal copy please private message me your email and I would be so happy to attach you a copy, along with brief guidelines.

I would love to encourage all you wonderful, committed couples to get really vulnerable with each other. Open and share what is truly going on inside.

12/17/2021

Trust and love is built by truly listening to our loved ones.

Regular times to connect is key. Meaning checking in with each other around how each is doing. At first these might need to be scheduled but over time they will become more fluid and natural.

Emotionally checking in with each other is a caring act of kindness and part of a healthy functioning relationship.

Knowing/hearing where your partner is and empathizing is giving emotional support. It is much easier than most think! A common misconception is that this process requires advice giving, problem solving or solution finding.

The real connective tissue is how well one can listen and how well one feels heard, known and understood by their partner. A person will need to feel “safe” to open up - this means free from emotionally wounding.

Below are a few key points on how to create safety for the speaker:

👉First step when listening to another is to put aside your own thoughts, feelings, agenda, perspective.
Pushing a pause on your own internal chatter… This will enable you to hear more clearly what the other is saying. I like to think of it as getting out of your own shoes and trying to understand where the other is coming from.
👉Connect with the other - being present and available - showing this either through body language - eye contact. Your body is saying I am interested in what you have to say and I want to hear what you want to say.
Show support - this means empathizing, showing understanding, validating - no put downs, criticisms or problem solving.
👉Summarize what you heard by repeating the key parts of what was said - to check out whether you are on the same page. Like - “so you are saying….”
👉Try and guess at what is not being said - what might be going on underneath and check it out with the other - like “it seems like you are really sad about that?” “Tell me more?”. Asking open questions is so important.
👉Show more empathy and understanding - like "Oh wow that sounds terrible, I understand how you feel, I get it, you are making total sense, no wonder you are upset..."

Address

1892 West Broadway
Vancouver, BC
V6J1Y9

Opening Hours

Tuesday	10am - 6pm
Wednesday	10am - 6pm
Thursday	10am - 6pm
Friday	10am - 6pm

Telephone

+6044405529

Website

http://www.mindfulspacecounselling.com/

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when MindFul Space Counselling posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Contact The Practice

Send a message to MindFul Space Counselling:

Shortcuts

Address
Telephone
Opening Hours
Alerts
Contact The Practice
Claim ownership or report listing

Want your practice to be the top-listed Clinic in Vancouver?