Time to Shine Therapy Services

01/24/2026

👏👏👏

People don’t realise how much we shrink ourselves just to exist.

With ADHD and autism, we’re always scanning.
Am I too much
Am I too quiet
Am I talking too fast
Did I say the wrong thing

So we shrink.

We soften our reactions.
We hide our excitement.
We hold back parts of ourselves that feel too loud, too intense, too different.

Not because we want to.
Because it feels safer.

Over time, that shrinking takes a toll.

You can be surrounded by people and still feel invisible.
You can be accepted and still feel unknown.
You can fit in and feel completely disconnected from yourself.

Then one day you’re exhausted.
Not just tired.
Tired of performing.
Tired of monitoring yourself.
Tired of pretending you’re okay with being smaller.

That isn’t you falling apart.
That’s you reaching a limit.

Unshrinking isn’t dramatic.
It’s quiet.
It’s letting yourself take up space again.
Laugh without checking the room.
Feel without apologising.
Exist without shrinking.

If this hit, you’re not broken.

You’ve just been holding yourself back for a long time.

And you were never meant to live small ❤️👽🙏

01/24/2026

For a long time, I honestly thought grief was something I was supposed to get past. Like a river I needed to cross as quickly as possible, or a storm I just had to wait out, or some phase I had to complete so I could get back to ‘normal.’

Well…none of that worked. Because grief doesn’t actually work that way.

What finally helped me make sense of it was looking at grief differently, something I’ve come to think of as the ‘Grief Bridge’. Not a bridge you race across. Not one you conquer. Not even one you want to step onto. But a bridge you eventually realize is the only way forward.

Most of us are taught, directly or indirectly, that grief is the enemy. Fight it. Fix it. Suppress it. Get over it. So we do what we’ve been conditioned to do, we resist it, push it down, and tell ourselves we should be doing better by now.

But I’ve learned the hard way that the more you fight grief, the louder it gets. It doesn’t disappear because we ignore it, and it doesn’t shrink because we pretend we’re fine. It just waits, and then shows up anyway, usually when we’re tired, alone, or least expecting it.

Here’s the thing…the Grief Bridge isn’t about escaping grief.

It’s about entering a new way of living. On one side of the bridge is the life you had before loss. On the other side is a life that will never be the same but can still be meaningful and connected.

Crossing the bridge doesn’t mean you leave grief behind. It means you carry it with you, not as a burden, but as part of who you are now. And yes, that idea can feel scary, because grief can feel like it will swallow everything if we let it.

But grief doesn’t replace joy. It learns to live beside it.

One of the biggest myths about grief is that joy is a betrayal. That laughing means forgetting. That smiling means you didn’t love deeply enough. That happiness somehow erases the person you lost.

It doesn’t.

Joy and sorrow aren’t opposites. They’re companions. You can miss someone terribly and still have moments of happiness. You can carry heartbreak and still experience moments of peace.

That’s what life looks like on the other side of the Grief Bridge. Not grief-free. But fuller. Deeper. More honest.

And crossing happens slowly. No one drags you across. Some days you take a step forward. Some days you sit down halfway across and cry. Some days you turn around and look back.

And…all of that counts.

Gary Sturgis – Surviving Grief

01/18/2026

01/18/2026

Sometimes healing doesn’t look like pushing forward, fixing everything, or “being strong.”

Sometimes healing looks like rest.

It looks like slowing down when the world tells you to speed up.
It looks like acknowledging that your heart has been holding a lot, grief, responsibility, disappointment, hope, survival.

If your heart feels heavy, tired, or overwhelmed, there is nothing wrong with you.
These are not signs of weakness. They are signs that you have endured.

Rest is not quitting.
Rest is not giving up.
Rest is how the nervous system repairs, how emotions soften, how we begin to feel safe again.

You are allowed to pause.
You are allowed to take up less space for a while.
You are allowed to tend to your heart gently, without urgency.

Be kind to yourself today.
Your heart needs a rest. and it deserves one🤍

01/09/2026

Therapy isn’t about fixing what’s broken.
It’s about gently uncovering what’s already there.

It’s a place to slow down.
To untangle the noise from your truth.
To understand your patterns with compassion instead of judgment.

Through reflection, support, and honest conversation, therapy helps you:

🤍 reconnect with yourself
🤍 build clarity and emotional safety
🤍 heal what’s been weighing you down
🤍 trust your inner voice again

When you do this work, you’re not forcing change
you’re creating the conditions for growth.

What’s meant for you doesn’t need chasing.
When you’re supported, grounded, and aligned…
it finds you.

Vanessa
Time to Shine Therapy

01/08/2026

💚

“My hand is at the small of your back; I may let you stumble, but I will never let you fall.” — Maya Angelou

January is Mental Wellness Month, a time to honor emotional care, healing, and the quiet strength it takes to keep going. Dr. Angelou reminds us that we are not meant to navigate life alone — that support, love, and compassion can hold us steady even when we falter.

Caring for our mental well-being is not a weakness. It is an act of courage, trust, and self-preservation.

You are allowed to stumble. You are never meant to fall alone. 🤍

01/08/2026

🧠 Burnout: A Nervous System Response

Burnout is not a lack of motivation, resilience, or commitment.

It is a nervous system response to prolonged stress, high responsibility, emotional labour, and insufficient recovery.

When demands consistently exceed capacity, the body shifts into survival mode. Over time, this can look like emotional exhaustion, difficulty concentrating, sleep disruption, detachment, irritability, cynicism, or physical symptoms such as headaches and stomach pain.

These changes are not signs of failure, they are protective adaptations. Your nervous system is doing its best to conserve energy and reduce further strain.

Therapy does not ask you to “push through” burnout. Instead, it focuses on restoring regulation, rebuilding capacity, and helping your body experience safety again, at a pace that respects what you’ve been carrying.

Burnout is treatable. Support helps.

💛 Virtual therapy available across British Columbia and In Person coming to the Westshore in February!

📧 vanessa@timetoshinetherapy.ca
timetoshinetherapy.ca

01/07/2026

Growth doesn’t start at the surface.
It starts underground.

What we don’t heal can quietly shape our thoughts, our relationships, and our sense of self. Anxiety, guilt, pain, exhaustion—these are not personal failures. They are signals.

With the right support, new roots can form.
Roots grounded in honesty, purpose, love, and hope.

Healing is not about erasing the past.
It’s about learning how to grow with it—stronger, wiser, and more connected to who you truly are.

If this image speaks to you, you don’t have to do this alone.

01/06/2026

Hi neighbours,
I wanted to share that in-person counselling will be coming to the Westshore this February through Time to Shine Therapy Services.

This space is being created for people who are feeling stretched thin, especially first responders, physicians, healthcare professionals, caregivers, and anyone carrying stress that doesn’t always show on the outside.

Support is available for:

• Anxiety, overwhelm, and burnout
• ADHD and busy, overstimulated minds
• Trauma or PTSD
• Grief, loss, and major life transitions
• Caregiver fatigue
• Feeling “okay” outwardly, but not inside
• Gerontology and aging; end of life specialist

Virtual sessions will continue as well.

If you’d like more information or want to join the February waitlist, you’re welcome to email: vanessa@timetoshinetherapy.ca

Wishing everyone a gentle start to the year !

01/03/2026

How do you know when your soul is happy?

Is it the quiet exhale at the end of a long day?
The moment your shoulders drop without you noticing?
Laughing without bracing for what comes next?

A happy soul isn’t loud or performative.
It’s often subtle.
It feels like alignment.
Like you’re not constantly pushing, proving, or surviving.

Most of us were never taught how to listen to our inner world.
We learned how to cope.
How to function.
How to keep going.

Soul-happiness grows when you begin to:

✨ Notice what drains you,and what restores you
✨ Honour your boundaries without guilt
✨ Feel safe enough to be honest with yourself
✨ Choose yourself in small, consistent ways

If this question lingered with you, you don’t have to figure it out alone.
Sometimes having a calm, supportive space to explore what your soul needs is enough to begin.

When you’re ready, support is here.
At your pace. 💛

Time to Shine Therapy

01/02/2026

Why Work With Me?

You don’t need to be fixed. You need to be understood.

I offer therapy that is calm, practical, and deeply human, grounded in over 20 years of healthcare experience and master’s-level clinical training. My approach is trauma-informed, collaborative, and paced to meet you where you are, not where you think you “should” be.

I specialize in supporting adults navigating trauma and PTSD, grief and loss, anxiety, ADHD, burnout, and major life transitions. I draw primarily from cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), while integrating compassion, nervous-system awareness, and real-world strategies that fit your daily life.

Clients often tell me they feel safe, seen, and not judged in our work together. There is no pressure to perform or explain yourself here. We focus on building insight, resilience, and self-trust in a way that feels sustainable and authentic.

Alongside clinical expertise, I bring lived experience, advocacy, and a strong understanding of how personal struggles intersect with family systems, work, and broader social pressures. Therapy with me is not about forcing positivity, it’s about creating space for clarity, healing, and meaningful change.

If you’re looking for thoughtful, grounded support that honours your story and helps you move forward at your own pace, I would be honoured to work with you.

Vanessa Butler, MSW, RSW
Time to Shine Therapy

01/02/2026

Yes 🙌