12/20/2025
& , at the best of times, without being , is HARD. It's hard to create the magic, keep everyone happy, and meet
and (see Wednesday's post).
So, let go of the , walk away from the drunk, judgey , and make a plan to deal with the , wont eat their plate, and the . If you can't turn down the family gathering invite, here are 5 things you CAN do:
1) with your partner about what the is (self/child) when you decide to leave. Honour that commitment and then walk away.
2) Limit the exposure so no one get too stressed. Come later and leave early. Have a set number of hours to be there so that no one gets too . It is okay to do this.
3) Find a , spot wherever you're gathered where you and your child can regroup. It's okay to withdraw and get relief. Tell others the kid(s) need time to play in the snow/outside and just take them out. They don't need to know exactly what or why you're doing it.
4) If your child is , have a cue word they can use when they start to get . This helps them and not get to the , point so you can just make your exit.
If they're not verbal, keep an eye on their face so you can see signs of - eyes widen, cheeks flush, eyebrows lift, pupils shrink, fast and short breathing.
5) Have a prepped:
- "Thank you for your concern. We are going to get some quiet time and come back when we're ready."
- "We're just going to go outside and get some fresh air for a few minutes."
- "They're really tired, so we're going to head out now so everyone can keep enjoying the get-together before they have a meltdown."
- "Please know I'm doing what we feel is best for our/my child."
Please know that someone else's agenda / idea of / / don't get to trump yours levels or your child's needs.
*Adults* can adjust their expectations and responses BECAUSE they're the .
Give yourself , lower your expectations, limit your time and plan recuperation time afterwards. You can get through this.