13/04/2026
This is actually really hard for me to share.
Because I’m a fitness coach… and there’s this idea that I should look a certain way.
And even if I don’t agree with it, a part of me still internalized that over the years.
And also because this brings up a lot.
Years of training really hard.
Years of not seeing the kind of definition in my legs I thought I should have.
Years of questioning myself.
Years of teachers in dance university telling me my butt was “nice for the beach”… but not for ballet.
And if I’m really honest… years of blaming myself for it...
This quiet thought in the back of my head of “maybe I’m just not doing enough”.
Today, before surgery, my doctor was marking my legs and I told him that I didn't quite believe my diagnosis of lipedema the first time, so I went and saw another doctor who also confirmed it...
And even though my legs don’t “look that bad”, he explained that a big part of that is actually because of my muscle… but there is also quite a bit of fat there.
They removed around 4 liters. I’m still like… what??
But more than anything, it felt validating.
Because the pain was real.
The heaviness was real.
And hearing that, seeing that… it was actually very healing in a way I didn’t expect.
I think one of the biggest things I’m learning through all of this is to listen even more than I already did...
To people when they talk about their pain or their symptoms.
But mainly… to your own body.
Because the way my legs looked didn’t bother me that much.
I got used to the thick thighs life. Thick thighs save lives after all ♡
But the pain got to a point where it was affecting me daily and my job and that’s when I couldn't ignore it anymore.
So now I’m here.
At the beginning of a long recovery.
A lot of patience ahead.
Trying to meet my body with a bit more understanding this time.
And I’m going to share this journey a lot.
Because I know how many women are in a similar situation…and get ignored just because it “doesn’t look that bad”.
If you’re my friend or family and feel like I’m “sharing too much”… please respect that.
Other women sharing their journey helped me more than you can imagine.
I’m just trying to do the same.♡