Robert Kos Therapy

Robert Kos Therapy Therapist based in Paris, specialising in supporting English-speaking expatriates and professionals.

I am committed to helping individuals and organisations cultivate healthier, more balanced lives.

Why Some Immigrants Struggle to Learn a New Language.Before you judge an expat's language skills, consider this: what if...
11/11/2025

Why Some Immigrants Struggle to Learn a New Language.

Before you judge an expat's language skills, consider this: what if the struggle isn't about a lack of effort, but an invisible battle? In my new video, I draw on my experience as a specialist language teacher to explore the hidden roles of neurodivergence, shame, and the crucial need for compassion.

You can find the full, in-depth video on my YouTube channel.
(Link in Bio).

Do you feel it? The dip in energy, the desire to hibernate, the general sense of being a little bit "off" as the days ge...
10/11/2025

Do you feel it? The dip in energy, the desire to hibernate, the general sense of being a little bit "off" as the days get shorter and darker. For many of us, the winter months bring on a form of the "winter blues," and for some, a more serious condition known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).

After spending most of my life in sunny climates, the notoriously dark winters of Paris have been a real adjustment. The constant grey can be overwhelming, and it has taught me the importance of being proactive about my mental health during this season.

In my latest blog post, I share my personal experience and offer a therapist's guide with seven practical, gentle strategies for coping with SAD and the winter blues — from nutrition and sleep to the power of a specific kind of light bulb.

🔗 Link in bio to read the full survival guide.
🧠 Tips to help you find a healthier balance this season.

The word "expat" is complicated. For many, it's a loaded term, heavy with a history of colonialism and privilege. So why...
06/11/2025

The word "expat" is complicated.

For many, it's a loaded term, heavy with a history of colonialism and privilege.

So why do I still use it? In my new video, I explore this sensitive topic, sharing my personal experience in Singapore and deconstructing the modern "gilded cage" of expat life in Paris.

You can find the full, in-depth video on my YouTube channel.
(Search "Robert Kos Therapy" on YouTube)

Do you ever check the headlines and come away feeling anxious, hopeless, or just plain overwhelmed? You are not alone. M...
05/11/2025

Do you ever check the headlines and come away feeling anxious, hopeless, or just plain overwhelmed? You are not alone. Many of us feel a moral duty to stay informed, but the constant stream of difficult news can take a profound toll on our mental health.
Taking care of your wellbeing isn't selfish; it's a necessary act of self-preservation that allows us to show up for others in a sustainable way. But how do we find a balance between staying engaged and protecting our peace?

In my latest blog post, I share some signs that the news might be impacting your mental health and offer a therapist's guide with six practical, gentle steps you can take to rethink your relationship with media and create healthier boundaries.

🔗 Link in bio to read the full post and find your balance.
🧠 Questions for reflection included.

Last year, I saw Duff McKagan of Guns N' Roses fame live in Paris. At 60, after nearly dying from alcoholism in his 30s,...
03/11/2025

Last year, I saw Duff McKagan of Guns N' Roses fame live in Paris. At 60, after nearly dying from alcoholism in his 30s, he wasn’t the picture of rock n' roll chaos I grew up with. He was tender, vulnerable, and grounded.

It got me thinking about healing, masculinity, and the broken role models many of us idolized as kids. For a long time, vulnerability and masculinity weren't allowed to mix.

But what if healing is the real rebellion? What if we're allowed to change the script of our lives?

In my latest blog post, I share my reflections on this powerful concert experience and what it teaches us about reinventing ourselves. It includes reflection prompts to help you explore your own heroes, the messages you grew up with, and the person you are becoming.

🔗 Link in bio to read the full post.
🧠 Reflection prompts and a creative activity included.

🎃 Just in time for Halloween… I wrote about how I went from horror-hater to appreciation — and what the genre can teach ...
01/11/2025

🎃 Just in time for Halloween… I wrote about how I went from horror-hater to appreciation — and what the genre can teach us about fear, power, and even pleasure.👻💥

From The Texas Chain Saw Massacre to Raw and The Blair Witch Project, horror opened up something unexpected in me — and maybe it can for you too.

🩸 New blog post is live — head to the link in my bio to read it.

Happy Halloween! 🎃 Let's talk about scary movies. For most of my life, I hated horror. It felt like reliving trauma, not...
31/10/2025

Happy Halloween! 🎃
Let's talk about scary movies.

For most of my life, I hated horror. It felt like reliving trauma, not watching a film. But something changed. In my new video, I share my personal journey from horror-hater to fan and explore a paradoxical idea: that a genre built on fear can be a profound, and even healing, tool for those of us with difficult life experiences.

You can find the full, in-depth video on my YouTube channel.
(Link in Bio)

🎥 Therapy meets Cronenberg⁠This winter, I found myself escaping the grey skies of Paris by immersing myself in the stran...
27/10/2025

🎥 Therapy meets Cronenberg

This winter, I found myself escaping the grey skies of Paris by immersing myself in the strange, unsettling world of David Cronenberg. His films aren't easy to watch, but they’re honest in a way that reminds me of therapy — uncomfortable, confronting, and ultimately transformative.

In my latest blog post, I reflect on the psychological undercurrents of The Brood, Crash, and A Dangerous Method, and how these films reveal truths about our emotions, our desires, and the stories we tell ourselves.

🔗 Link in bio to read the full post
🧠 Questions for reflection included

23/09/2025

Can a cricket team really dismantle colonialism?

This isn't just a sports story, it's about the fierce, beautiful power of using the master's tools to dismantle the master's house. "Fire in Babylon" taught me that identity, pride, and resistance can be forged on a cricket pitch – with 90mph deliveries and unapologetic defiance.

When have you turned something meant to diminish you into your greatest strength?

Let's talk about the silent struggles that shape us.

https://www.robertkostherapy.com/l/fire-in-babylon-west-indies-cricket-colonialism-identity/

16/09/2025

We talk about everything else, but the silent shame (or secret pride) of where we come from often shapes us more than we dare admit. From the vibrant dancefloors of Singaporean clubs to the fierce loyalty of 'Westies' in Australia, and even the hidden guilt of privilege – class isn't just about money, it's about identity. And until we name it, it keeps us isolated.

How has your class story shaped you?

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. You can find the full blog post on my website for a deeper dive.

https://www.robertkostherapy.com/l/class-pride-shame-healing/

Share your own reflections in the comments below. Let's break this silence together.

09/09/2025

We think healing means fixing the past—a task that is impossible.

But what if healing isn’t about changing what happened? What if it's about changing your relationship to what happened? This is a story about a 74-year-old woman’s journey, and it's a powerful reminder that the work of finding inner peace and self-compassion has no expiration date.

https://www.robertkostherapy.com/l/the-power-of-letting-go-healing-long-term-family-pain-in-your-70s/

This is a big one, but what is one belief about “healing” that you've had to unlearn in your own life? I’d love to hear your insights in the comments.

04/09/2025

Can ChatGPT be your therapist? It can give you a list of "brutal truths" about yourself in seconds. Here's why that might be a terrible idea.

I tested a "tough love psychologist" AI prompt. While some of its insights were surprisingly accurate, it delivered them like a series of truth bombs.

This highlights the biggest risk of using AI for mental health: it can give you information, but it can't provide the safe, human relationship needed to process and integrate it.

Healing isn't about collecting data about your flaws; it's about the slow, supported journey of self-discovery.

This is a deep question, but what’s the difference for you between raw information and true wisdom? I’d love to read your thoughts in the comments.

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Place De La Reunion
Paris
75020

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