17/11/2025
**TRAUMA SAYS:**
I need to explain everything so they don't misunderstand me or get upset.
Because in the past, silence meant danger. A wrong tone, a delayed response, or even an innocent question could trigger conflict I never saw coming. Trauma trained me to over-explain as a way to protect myself—an armor made of apologies, clarifications, and unnecessary justifications. I learned to scan every expression, every pause, every shift in someone’s voice to make sure I wasn’t the cause of their discomfort. I learned to believe that if someone became upset, it must be my fault. So I rehearsed my words, minimized my needs, and carried the weight of everyone else’s reactions as if they belonged to me.
**HEALING SAYS:**
I will no longer explain myself out of fear.
How someone perceives my truth is a reflection of them. And if there's any misunderstanding, the right people will ask, not assume. Healing reminds me that communication doesn't need to be a performance or a survival strategy. It can be a simple exchange rooted in respect, curiosity, and openness. Healing teaches me that I am not responsible for managing someone else's emotions, expectations, or projections. It teaches me that my sincerity is enough, that my needs are valid without a full presentation deck, and that my boundaries stand firm even if they disappoint someone.
Healing whispers that the people meant for me—those with emotional maturity, empathy, and self-awareness—won’t demand explanations to feel safe. They will meet me where I am, ask for clarity when needed, and hold space without assuming the worst. With them, I don’t have to shrink myself, over-talk, or defend every decision. I can simply exist.
Healing also gently points out that misunderstandings are a normal part of human connection, not a sign of failure. The right people won’t punish me for them; they will participate in resolving them. They will come closer, not pull away.
Most importantly, healing encourages me to trust my voice again—to speak from truth instead of fear, to share without performing, and to let authenticity replace anxiety.
