Confident Kids Ltd

27/07/2021

We are now doing 1 to 1 or 1 to 2 face-to-face coaching during August, Thursdays and Fridays. If you're son/daughter is in need of some preparation and support before they transition to Secondary school or are struggling with worries/anxieties, please get in touch. We're here to help.

21/06/2021

As another difficult academic year for both our children and their teachers begins to draw to a close, we are now becoming more aware of the impact of COVID on our children. Well certainly in academic terms - The Education Endowment Foundation summarises it for Primary ages:

"The first study finds that disadvantage gaps for primary maths have widened since Autumn 2019. Between
Autumn 2019 and Autumn 2020, the gap in maths widened by between 10% and 24%. During the Autumn term
there was no evidence that this gap narrowed. This seems to indicate that while disadvantaged pupils suffered
disproportionate harms to learning during the first national lockdown, they have not received disproportionate
improvements to learning after returning to school. The study did not detect and increase in the disadvantage gap
for reading.
The study did not find associations between different school responses to remote learning and changes to the
attainment gaps in English or maths (e.g. the use of live or recorded lessons, or frequency of work submission). In
Autumn term there was some tentative evidence that providing live lessons to absent pupils was associated with
reductions in the attainment gap."

BUT what about the softer skills...? Preparing to transition to secondary schools... Developing a clearer sense of self, acting more independently, gaining some maturity to hold their own in a predominantly teen environment and behaving with more confidence and awareness as they start the next part of their educational journey...?

If your child needs support with any of the above softer skills, or is simply anxious about moving to Secondary School, LET US HELP - please get in touch, Confident Kids can provide interventions to help them. We are hoping to run confidence, resilience, understanding anxieties and anti-bullying courses in the coming weeks, so if you are interested please what's App or call me on: 07949 051503.
Best wishes Caroline

20/04/2021

There's a lot here we already know, but it's a concerning read...

Fernando Rivera "Al Natural"
October 26, 2019 ·
Dr. Ovidio, Pediatric Neurologist's alert to a silent tragedy unfolding today in our homes.

There is a silent tragedy unfolding today in our homes, and it concerns our most precious jewels: our children. Our children are in a devastating emotional state! Over the past 15 years, researchers have given us increasingly alarming statistics on a sharp and steady rise in childhood mental illness that is now reaching epidemic proportions:
Stats don't lie:
• 1 out of 5 children have mental health issues
• There has been a 43 % increase in ADHD
• A 37 % increase in teen depression has been noted
• There has been a 200 % increase in su***de rate for children aged 10 years
What is going on and what are we doing wrong?
Children today are being over-stimulated and over-gifted of material objects, but are deprived of the fundamentals of a healthy childhood, such as:
• Emotionally available parents
• Clearly defined limits
• Responsibilities
• Balanced nutrition and proper sleep
• Movement in general but especially outdoors
• Creative game, social interaction, unstructured game opportunities and spaces for boredom
Instead, these past few years have been filled with children:
• Digitally distracted parents
• Forgiving and permissive parents who let children ′′ rule the world ′′ and whoever sets the rules
• A sense of right, to deserve everything without earning it or to be responsible for obtaining it
• Inadequate dream and unbalanced nutrition
• A sedentary lifestyle
• Endless stimulation, tech nannies, instant gratification and absence of boring moments
What to do?
If we want our children to be happy and healthy individuals, we need to wake up and get back to the basics. It's still possible! Many families see immediate improvements after weeks of deploying the following recommendations:
• Set boundaries and remember that you are the captain of the ship. Your kids will feel safer when they know you're in control of the rudder.
• Offer kids a balanced lifestyle filled with what kids NEED, not just what they WANT. Don't be afraid to say ′′ no ′′ to your kids if they want isn't what they need.
• Provide nutritious foods and limit junk food.
• Spend at least an hour a day outdoors doing activities like: biking, walking, fishing, bird watching / insects
• Enjoy a daily family dinner with no smart phones or technology that distracts you.
• Play board games as a family or if the children are too small for board games, let themselves be carried away by their interests and allow them to rule in the game
• Involve your children in some homework or housework according to their age (fold clothes, order toys, hang clothes, unpack food, set table, feed the dog etc. ))
• Implements a consistent sleep routine to ensure your child gets enough sleep. The schedules will be even more important for school-aged children.
• Teaching responsibility and independence. Don't overshadow them from frustration or mistakenness. Wrong will help them develop resilience and learn to overcome the challenges of life
• Do not carry your children's backpack, do not carry your backpacks, do not carry them the task they forgot, do not fight bananas or fight their oranges if they can do it alone (4-5 years old). Instead of giving them the fish, teach them how to fish.
• Teach them to wait and delay gratification.
• Provide opportunities for ′′ boredom ", as boredom is the moment creativity awakens. Don't feel responsible for always keeping kids entertained.
• Don't use technology as a cure for boredom, nor offer it to the first second of inactivity.
• Avoid the use of technology during meals, in cars, restaurants, shopping malls. Use these moments as opportunities to socialize by training brains like this to know how to work when they are in mode: ′′ boredom ′′
• Help them create a ′′ boredom jar ′′ with activity ideas for when they're bored.
• Be emotionally available to connect with children and teach them self-regulation and social skills:
• Turn off phones at night when kids have to go to bed to avoid digital distraction.
• Become a regulator or emotional coach of your children. Teach them to recognize and manage their own frustrations and anger.
• Teach them to say hello, to take turns, to share without being without anything, to say thank you and please acknowledge the error and apologize (do not force them), be a model of all those values you instill.
• Connect emotionally - smile, hug, kiss, tickle, read, dance, jump, play or crawl with them.
Article written by Dr. Luis Rojas Marcos, Psychiatrist.

Barrio Palermo | Palermonline Noticias | Información del Barrio de Palermo | Desde 1999.

23/03/2021

I am all too aware that people are suffering with a variety of anxiety disorders as a result of a year's lock-down... it's not hard to see why. Agoraphobia and social anxiety are amongst the most common, after months of isolation from friends and family. I certainly believe there are glimpses of this in many of us now and children are obviously not immune to these concerns either.

These are not rational disorders so, to help friends or family, work with their emotions, focus on how they are feeling, use distraction and very gradually introduce the very situations they fear and avoid. I think, more than ever, what we all need now - our children included, are not things to hold us back, but the very essence of what it means to live again...

Someone to love - hugs and cuddles
Something to do - back to work, school & sports
Something to look forward to... reconnecting with people and may be a holiday!
I say bring it on!!!

08/03/2021

Congratulations if your child/children have gone back to school today! 😅 Many of us have a day or two to wait, but isn't it great that life is finally moving back into a consistent routine!

Mum's 'all day cafe' can finally close, 'what's for dinner?' can wait until after 4pm, daily debates about x-box usage can be saved until the weekend, continual questions and initiatives to encourage exercise can cease and we can reclaim a bit of time for ourselves... hopefully! But what now...?

How many of us have felt more anxious ourselves, or noticed it in our children? While we know that any time a child faces significant change, it can cause fear and anxiety, did we understand that unmanaged it can affect both the body and the brain?! If your child/children are at all anxious, check this out - 8 tips to help us manage our children's anxiety and hopefully help make their re-entry to school smoother and more enjoyable.

It's normal for children and teens to feel anxious about coronavirus disease (COVID-19). A therapist shares how parents can help ease anxiety at home.

03/02/2021

It is so encouraging to hear so many people talk about the importance of good mental health. I am not an expert, but my psychology studies, affirmed the premise that we are all somewhere on the mental health scale. We move positively or negatively along it, according to our circumstances, our environment, our physical health and even the impact of the people around us. So, I have always strived to be a force for good and never has this been more important.

On a personal level (both with my own son and other children I talk to regularly), it has become acutely apparent that, as parents, we are front line mental health advocates and role models for our children. So, taking the time to consider:
- our behaviour - the need to be positive and encouraging (in spite of the world around us), create family time, safety & reassurance;
- our actions - making time for ourselves (that can be soooo hard!?) and for seeing/talking to others... one at a time obvs!;
- our activities - encouraging them to seek regular fresh air, exercise, music, jigsaw puzzles etc (and oh how hard it can be to extract them from the X-box/Play Station!), talk, move & sleep well;..are absolutely essential.

In doing this, we are helping our children to successfully navigate this ever-changing, strange, challenging and stressful new world. And what a fantastic job most people are doing.

It is likely that the majority of our children will be part of a generation which is resilient, well-adjusted and emotionally self-regulating, but it is equally important that we look out for those who cannot or do not receive the same support and guidance.

Can we help someone who's struggling, can we provide an ear, contact a friend for them, lend them your dog (my Labrador fully supports this!), or arrange a walk in the fresh air?

Mental ill-health can affect anyone, any day or time of the year, but with our support most people can get the right help and learn how to treat it and live with it. If we help our children & their friends now, we are helping tomorrow's adults to build a better society, with less vulnerability, less ill health and even less homelessness. (Research has shown that poor mental health can be both a cause and a consequence of homelessness - Crisis, 2019).

So after months of lockdown, along with the many other stresses coronavirus brings, it has never been so important to look after your mental wellbeing and to teach our children how to look after theirs!

03/09/2020

As children start to get back to school and into a new routine, with more structure... what next? Some children are finding it challenging and have mixed feelings, including some anxieties after being at home for so long. Confident Kids will be working with individuals and schools to support the SENCO function and provide children with as much listening, guidance and reassurance as possible. If your child, or indeed your school, would like some additional help, please do get in touch. I hope you, and your children, are delighted that they are going back, and they have a great school year! xx

14/08/2020

If your child is about to enter Year 7 and would benefit from some 1 to 1 coaching around confidence, resilience and handling their emotions as they enter Secondary School, we're here to help! Their concerns might be specific or general, but we can help to give them the insights, tips, techniques and confidence to handle their first few weeks in a big new school with less anxiety. Please see our reviews /Haddenham.net comments for views and recommendations.