17/09/2024
I’m currently reading book Manifest, and I was struck by how much of it is relevant to parenting small children. Have you ever approached bedtime with a sense of dread, visualising yourself chasing your toddler around the bedroom with a pair of pyjamas? When you think about bedtime, do you start to feel heavy and crave a few moments to yourself more desperately?
Roxie's book discusses how there is very little difference between the brain experiencing an event and visualising it. Visualising stressful experiences, such as bedtime, can lead to powerful physiological effects in the body, including an increased heart rate and higher cortisol levels.
This can create a self-fulfilling prophecy: if you start bedtime with negative thoughts, your body is primed for a negative reaction, making bedtime a disaster. This often leads to feelings of post-bedtime guilt, as you might feel you didn’t handle the situation as you wanted to and that the end of the day with your child wasn’t as you had hoped (I’ve been there!). Conversely, if you visualise a positive experience, your nervous system calms down. During coaching calls, I often discuss the importance of mindset and taking a few moments to calm yourself before starting bedtime. Positive visualisation can be one of the techniques you use in these moments, helping you approach bedtime with the best chance of success. A positive mindset and a few tweaks to your little one’s routine can create the change needed to make bedtime a time of connection that both parents and children crave.
