Counselling in Blackpool

18/02/2022

Now that COVID is less prevalent and things are returning to normal I am back working face to face.

Just a note to any couples out there who may want relationship counselling I only do this face to face not on-line. Thanks

Here's to a new normal.....

01/03/2021

I hope that this blog is helpful to those who are suffering from anxiety at the moment. Mindfulness can be helpful in so many ways but it is not for everyone. If you are someone who finds mindfulness useful then I hope this give you some other ways of using it. If you have never used mindfulness why not try some of the ideas in the blog and see if they work for you.... if you just need help on understanding anxiety and worry why not give this a read...
https://www.counsellinginblackpool.com/mindfulness-for-anxiety/

First of all let us be clear about what Mindfulness is. Mindfulness means paying attention in a particular way…. on purpose in the present moment, non-judgmentally, to things as they are… (Jon Kabat-Zinn) So, Mindfulness is about paying attention - bringing our attention to something in a partic...

20/02/2021

17/02/2021

Just found an excellent series on IPlayer called Man Up. It is men talking about their expectations of what it it like to be a man. Here is the link

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p07982y2/man-up-expectation-body-image

What do you think is expected of you as men?

15/02/2021

As promised my blog on counselling and what actually happens in the counselling room. For many counselling can remain a mystery but hopefully this will help you understand what happens and may encourage more people to try it.

https://www.counsellinginblackpool.com/de-mystifying-counselling/

So what actually happens when you come to a counselling session? You have taken the first and hardest step by picking up the phone and ask for a session. This is probably the hardest part of counselling – picking up the phone with those anxious feelings and churning stomach. Well done. The counsel...

12/02/2021

How have you been doing? Any better at using the smalled word in our language?

All my blogs up to now have had the theme of anger running through them. I am now going to start on a different theme/thread. I am gong to write a number of blogs on more varied topics that I hope will be useful. Email/text/message me if you have any ideas on what you would like me to blog about

The first of these is on counselling and what actualy happens from when you pick up the phone and make that first contact to counsellig endings and knowing when it is time to finish the counselling. This is coming on Monday.

03/02/2021

Other aspects of assertiveness.

01/02/2021

In this blog I explore one aspect of anger - assertiveness. This is often seen as the healthy way of expressing anger. I have only concentrated on one aspect and that is the art of saying "No". It is only a small word but we find it hard so hard to say it.

https://www.counsellinginblackpool.com/assertiveness/

Assertiveness is when we express our anger in a healthy way. It is a healthy expression of anger. In our culture, assertiveness could be seen as teaching other people how to treat us, hear us and respect us without disrespecting them. Have you ever been in a job and gone to pay for something and

27/01/2021

Assertive is sometimes called healthy anger. It is about stating what we need at a given time without attacking the other person but respecting them and their views.

Watch out for my next blog on Assertiveness.

25/01/2021

Rage can be a dangerous emotion. It is evoked when we feel our life is being threatened. Read more in this blog.

https://www.counsellinginblackpool.com/anger-and-rage/

There are 5 anger styles – Aggressive, Passive, Passive Aggressive and Rage and Assertiveness. Let me give a very short explanation of each before exploring rage in more detail. Aggressive anger is when someone explodes when they are angry. They don’t hold back and you know they are angry – it...

23/01/2021

Fear is what causes us to get into a rage. It is a built in survival strategy. When we are fearful for our lifes we can get into a rage. Read more in my next blog on Monday,

21/01/2021

We all have a responsibility to help boys grow up to be emtionally effective. Next time you see a baby boy don't say "What a fighter" say something like "How cute he looks".

19/01/2021

Bottling up our anger never does any good. Learning to name what we are feelling, at any one time, is the task of a lifetime but it leads to a calmer way of life with less angry outbursts. As men have been "trained" not to express their emotions they find this really hard to do but help is at hand. It is difficult but a person who really loves us will help us to engage with our emotions. They will forever nudge, encourage and ask you to talk about them. This leads to a deeper relationship where you can communicate with each other.

So partners keep nudging and men try and step out, overcoming the fear, and name those emotions rather than putting them in bottles.

11/01/2021

I thought I would start this years blog with you particularly aimed at men and how they are conditioned when growing up to "stuff" their emotions inside of them.... How it is not manly to show emotions.... How boys growing up are conditioned to be a certain way.... read the blog to find out more.

https://www.counsellinginblackpool.com/roots-of-anger

10/01/2021

So here we are in a new year. We can look forward with the eyes of yesterday and let it cloud our future or we can look forward with the eyes of tomorrow and let the sun illumine our day! Let us be open to the delights a new year can bring. I know I am, what about you?

A new year and a new beginning. Why not make this the year that you get to grips with your anger. That you start to help yourself and those you are in relationship with - family, friends, work colleagues, partners, wifes/husbands, etc.

Have a read of the t-shirt and asses your own anger at the moment.

23/12/2020

Don't keep ignoring your anger.... it is trying to tell you something!

21/12/2020

As it is the end of the year and we could all do with some positive news in this weeks blog I have discussed the positive side of anger. Giving it a good press instead of a bad one that it seems to always get.

https://www.counsellinginblackpool.com/positively-angry/

We are very good at categorising our emotions into good and bad. In her book The Language of Emotions Karla McLaren describes them like this. “The socially accepted view is that there are good emotions and bad emotions. These categories have a bit of interplay, but basically, good emotions are the...

18/12/2020

If you are thinking about having some counselling this might help you to have a little more understanding of what counselling is and what it is not.