04/02/2021
I wanted to share this you, as I think a lot of people might be feeling this way, at this time.
My best self.
Today I wasn’t my best self
Actually for the last week I haven’t been my best self
My best self isn’t about being good at things
But how I feel, how I react to external things
My ability to cope and compartmentalise
If I knew I was my best self, I would know that I wouldn’t feel things as sharply
That my emotions wouldn’t be throbbing like a raw nerve
I wouldn’t feel teary for no reason
I wouldn’t cry over something, that normally wouldn’t even cross my mind
My best self is in here,
But today and maybe for a few more days she has gone away
So until we find eachother again
I am going to sit with not being my best self
And have open dialogue about the impact that things have on me
Create my boundaries
Speak my truth
Until my best self, my happiest self comes back
And I know she will
It feels good to know myself
To understand that under different circumstances, I might react differently
To give space to my fears and feelings and thoughts
To own me
Find your space, it can be okay be there for a while.