06/02/2026
ONLINE ABUSIVE TROLLS: WHAT’S THE BEST MEDICINE?
The simplest and most effective response is to delete, block, and move on.
It is the quickest way to deal with online abuse, and believe me, it hurts them far more than you might imagine. Depriving them of attention removes the very thing they are seeking.
However, the reality is that it is not always that straightforward. In some situations, walking away feels impossible, particularly where these so-called attention, seeking, online cowardice goblins believe they hold some form of leverage or blackmail over you.
My intention here is, first and foremost, to help victims understand the psychology that underpins the behaviour of these cowardly armchair goblins, and secondly, to offer clear, practical ways to counter their harmful and deeply unhealthy intentions.
So what is it all about? Why are these people so intent on harming others?
Whilst there may reasons why they engage in such horrible acts, again, in simple terms, its about control and power.
Think about it this way.
The vast majority of us engage in healthy forms of competition, through sport, music, or other pursuits. When we win, we hold the upper hand for a moment. We feel confident, in control, and powerful. That sense of achievement feels good because it is earned fairly and expressed appropriately.
Those who lose may feel disappointed and momentarily powerless, but they accept the outcome with dignity. They regroup, learn, and try again.
This is what healthy power and control look like when exercised positively. The losers respect the winners, and the winners respect the losers, without harmful intent, without abuse of power, and certainly without any desire to harm another person.
By contrast, those whose intent is to hurt others usually remain anonymous.
They hide behind screens because they are cowards. Their aim is not competition, dialogue, or truth, but harm. They seek a false sense of control and power, achieved through cruelty rather than courage.
They do not care about you, about me, or about the impact on our families or anyone else. From behind an armchair and a keyboard, they attempt to inflict as much damage as possible while avoiding accountability.
If there were ever a true definition of cowardice, this would be it.
Their depravity knows no limits.
Even when individuals are driven to harm themselves, and, tragically, in some cases to take their own lives, because of such sick, vile, and intentional cruelty, these deeply disturbed individuals are often the first to emerge from behind the shield of anonymity.
They surface offering condolences or performative displays of “support.” This compounds the harm, adding insult to injury, while those around remain unaware that it was, in fact, these very individuals who contributed to the suffering in the first place.
They are the first ones to say: "thats terrible Jack was a lovely lad I cant believe hes gone."
“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”
In my sixty years of life, I have yet to meet a single human being who is without fault, myself very much included.
Like you, I have heard the endless stories of su***de, self-harm, addiction, and despair. These are not signs of weakness; they are often desperate attempts to survive pain, or, for some, to escape it altogether. Very often, that pain stems from choices we made when we were struggling, choices we wish we could undo.
Regret, shame, and guilt follow. And uncomfortable as they are, those feelings are not our enemies. They are our moral compass at work, signalling that our actions do not align with who we truly are. That inner discomfort matters. It tells us we still care. It calls us to heal, to grow, and, ultimately, to support others with greater compassion.
Then there are the cowards.
When they discover moments in our lives we are not proud of, they take pleasure in it. They exploit it. In many cases, they blackmail, demanding substantial sums of money under the threat of exposure. The result is terror: living in constant fear that our most private struggles will be dragged into the public eye, fearing disgrace, humiliation, and the pain this would cause our families.
The Very Hard Choice
So, what should you do?
No one would misunderstand if you chose to keep things to yourself, to live in fear, to stay silent, to keep paying again and again, not just financially but emotionally and psychologically too. That response is human. It’s understandable.
But the truth is this: the harder choice is often the best choice.
There are dozens of good people who will support you, who will respect you, who will stand with you and walk beside you every step of the way. Yes, threats may still be made. But here’s the shift, they no longer control you. They no longer exploit you. They no longer blackmail you. Their power evaporates the moment you refuse to be ruled by fear.
They don’t get their sick satisfaction anymore. The puppet strings are cut.
It’s over. Finished.
And now, you are free to heal, to grow, to reclaim yourself.
It may take time. It may take courage. It may take hard, uncomfortable work. But you will get there. And when you do, you’ll find something remarkable: you are able to offer compassion, solace, and hope to others who are just beginning the very journey you once feared.
The reality is this, most people are kind. Most people understand. We’ve all been there, in one way or another. There are no living saints. The good ones won’t judge you. They won’t mock you. They won’t cast stones.
And the ones who do? They speak with forked tongues. They are no different from the armchair goblins they resemble.
So reach out. There are good people, friends, clergy, counsellors who will listen and help you carry the weight.
If this is you, take the risk. Don’t live your life like this. You don’t have to. You don’t deserve to. No one does.
Fight back, not with fists, but with your whole heart and soul.
I promise you this: it can get better. It will get better. And here’s the best part, the goblins wither. They shrink. They fade into nothing.
They lose
YOU WIN!!
