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Stay Calm

Offering solutions for Schools & families to support the mental health, wellbeing of children & teenagers. Including SEN

25/01/2026

Just 7 seconds. That’s all it takes.

It takes the amygdala — the part of the brain focused on survival — around 7 seconds to fire a neurochemical reaction that we experience as an emotion.

Fast. Automatic. Protective.

The amygdala’s job isn’t to check facts or think things through.
Its job is to ask one question only:
“Am I safe?”

So when something feels threatening — a comment, a look, an email, a memory — your body reacts before your thinking brain has even had a chance to arrive.

And that’s not a flaw.

That’s biology.

But here’s the empowering part ✨
If you can pause for just 7 seconds, you give your nervous system the chance to settle and your thinking brain the opportunity to come back online.

A simple 7-second tool to move through emotion

Next time you feel triggered or overwhelmed:
1. Pause (just for 7 seconds)
Don’t fix it. Don’t judge it. Just pause.
2. Breathe
Slow your breath down.
In through your nose…
Out through your mouth.
Longer exhale if you can — this tells your nervous system you’re safe.
3. Be curious
Silently ask:
What am I feeling right now?
Where do I feel it in my body?
No story. No blame. Just noticing.
4. Let it flow
Emotions are energy in motion.
When we don’t resist them, they move through us.
When we fight them, they get stuck.
You don’t need to react to every feeling.

You don’t need to suppress it either.
Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is breathe, get curious, and allow.

Seven seconds can change everything.

From reaction to response.

From protection to presence.

From overwhelm to choice.

Be gentle with yourself — your nervous system is always trying to help 💛

24/01/2026

This year’s Children’s Mental Health Week theme, “This Is My Place,” invites us to think about where children feel safe, accepted and that they belong.

For many children, that place might be home.
But sadly, we know this isn’t true for every child.
Some children don’t have a consistent safe space.
Some are living with uncertainty, change or loss.
Some may be in foster care, temporary accommodation, or environments that don’t feel emotionally safe.

And this is where the Magical Garden becomes so important 💚

The Magical Garden is not a physical place — it’s an inner one.

A place a child creates themselves.
A place that cannot be taken away.
A place they can return to anytime, anywhere.

When children are guided into their Magical Garden, they are gently shown that:
🌼 safety can exist inside them
🌼 calm is something they can access
🌼 they are allowed to feel protected, even when life feels unsettled

In their garden, they are in control.
They choose what is there.
They decide who is welcome.
They notice what helps them feel calm, grounded and held.

For a child who doesn’t feel safe, this can be incredibly powerful.

It offers:
✨ a sense of consistency
✨ a feeling of ownership
✨ a place of comfort they can carry with them

The garden becomes their place — not because someone else says so, but because it feels true to them.

By returning to their Magical Garden, children begin to build an inner connection to safety, belonging and self-worth. Over time, this can support emotional regulation, resilience and trust — especially for children who have had to be brave far too early.

“This is My Place” doesn’t always mean four walls or a postcode.
Sometimes, it means helping a child discover:
👉 I have a place inside me
👉 I can feel safe within myself
👉 I belong, even when things feel uncertain

And that is a gift every child deserves 🌷

24/01/2026

✨ NEW FREE RESOURCE FOR TEACHERS & HOME EDUCATORS ✨

🌟 The Calm Ball – A Magical Mindfulness Teacher Resource 🌟

I’m so excited to share The Calm Ball, a gentle, imaginative resource created to help children feel calm, safe, and connected.
Using a simple story and the power of imagination, children sit together in a circle and pass an invisible Calm Ball from one child to the next. As the Calm Ball is shared, calm spreads through the room, helping bodies slow down and settle.

This activity is especially supportive for children who experience worry, anxiety, overwhelm, or big emotions – and it works beautifully without needing children to talk about how they feel.

💛 What’s included:
✨ A calming story to read aloud
✨ Clear, step-by-step teacher guidance
✨ A bright classroom poster
✨ Two simple colouring pages suitable for young children

🌈 Perfect for:
✔️ Early Years & KS1 classrooms
✔️ Nurture groups & calm corners
✔️ Transitions & end-of-day wind-downs
✔️ One-to-one reassurance
✔️ Home-educated children

The Calm Ball can also be used individually, helping children imagine placing comforting things inside their Calm Ball – such as a favourite teddy, a parent, or kind words – to support their stress response and help them feel safe.

✨ Calm can be shared. Calm can grow. Calm can always come back. ✨

You can find The Calm Ball – A Magical Mindfulness Teacher Resource now in my website store 💛

24/01/2026

✨ NEW FREE RESOURCE FOR TEACHERS & HOME EDUCATORS ✨
🌟 The Great Rescue of Lumi – A Magical Breathing Teacher Resource 🌟

I’m so excited to share a new, gentle wellbeing resource I have created to help children calm their bodies and feel safe through story, breath, and imagination.

The Great Rescue of Lumi is a magical breathing story designed for children aged 4–7. Through an adventure in the Whispering Woods, children help Lumi the Light Sprite escape the Stormy Cave of Wobbly Feelings by using slow, gentle breathing – especially breathing out for longer than breathing in.

This simple practice helps the body slow down, settle, and feel safe, making it a powerful tool for children who experience worry, nervousness, fear, or overwhelm.

💛 What’s included in the resource:
✨ A beautifully written magical story with guided breathing moments
✨ A calming poster for classrooms or calm corners
✨ 2 colouring pages to support quiet focus and integration
✨ A clear teacher introduction and guidance
✨ An easy-to-understand explanation of how and why the breathing works

How it can be used:
✔️ In schools – during transitions, after playtime, before learning, or as part of wellbeing and nurture sessions
✔️ In home education – as a gentle daily practice or support for big feelings
✔️ With individual children or small groups
✔️ No preparation or equipment needed – just 5–10 minutes

This resource gently reminds children that they already have the tools inside them to help themselves feel calm, brave, and okay.
If you’d like to learn more or download The Great Rescue of Lumi – A Magical Breathing Teacher Resource, you’ll find it in my website store
Click on the link in the comments to download your free pack and let me know how you get on with it.

23/01/2026

A great way to end the week with The Friday Gang!
A bit of chat, lots of laughs and some mindfulness.
Today we had a bit of a sing song at the end - including a great rendition of Hero by Mariah Carey - which always makes us feel happy.
Totally love my Fridays when I get to be with them 😊🥰

22/01/2026

How Often Do You Pause During the Day?

How often do we truly pause during the day?

Not a coffee break while scrolling.
Not a moment between tasks where the mind is already racing to the next thing.

But a real pause.

Most of our days are spent moving from one task to the next on autopilot. Our nervous system rarely gets the message that it’s safe to slow down. Over time, this constant “go, go, go” can leave us feeling overwhelmed, irritable, tired, or disconnected from ourselves and from those around us.

✨ Why Pausing Matters

A pause doesn’t need to be long to be powerful.
Even a few moments can:
Calm the nervous system
Help regulate emotions
Improve focus and clarity
Reduce stress and reactivity
Create a sense of grounding and presence

When we pause, we give our body and mind a chance to reset. We move out of survival mode and back into connection – with ourselves, our surroundings, and the people around us.

🌱 Try This Today

As an experiment, try adding a pause at the end of each task today.
It can be just 10–30 seconds.
During your pause, you might:
🔵 Take 2–3 slow, deep breaths
🔵 Look around and notice your surroundings
🔵 Feel your feet on the floor or your body in the chair
🔵 Silently say a positive affirmation such as:
✨I am doing enough
✨I am safe right now
✨I can take this moment slowly
Simply observe – without fixing or changing anything

There is no “right” way to pause. The intention is what matters.

🌼 Supporting Yourself (and Others)
As you introduce this gentle practice into your day, notice how it supports you:

😊 Do you feel calmer?
😊 More present?
😊 Less rushed or reactive?

Once it feels familiar, this is a beautiful tool to share.
Parents can model pauses and invite children or teenagers to try them together

Teenagers can use pauses to manage stress, anxiety, and overwhelm

Teachers can build pauses into the school day – between lessons, after tasks, or before transitions
Children and young people learn regulation through us first. When they see adults pausing, breathing, and grounding, they learn that slowing down is safe and allowed.

🌿 Moving Forward

A pause is a small act of self-care with a big impact.
It’s not about doing more.
It’s about creating space.
So today, see what happens when you pause… and then gently pass that gift on to the children and young people in your life.

21/01/2026

💛 Children Don’t Learn Calm by Being Told to Calm Down 💛

They learn calm by borrowing our nervous system.

When we slow… they slow.
When we soften… they soften.
When we feel safe… they feel safe.
This is called co-regulation — and it always comes before self-regulation.

🧠 What this means for parents and teachers

A child who is overwhelmed, anxious, angry, or dysregulated is not being difficult.

Their nervous system is in survival mode.

In that moment, their brain can’t access:
• logic
• reasoning
• listening
• learning

They don’t need a lecture.
They need safety.
And safety comes through you.

🌿 Your nervous system leads the way

Children are constantly reading:
• your tone of voice
• your facial expression
• your body posture
• your pace and energy

Before a child can calm themselves, they need to feel calm in someone else.

✨ How to help a child reset their nervous system

Before fixing, teaching or correcting, try this:
• Pause and slow yourself first
• Take a longer breath out
• Lower your voice
• Soften your face
• Come down to their level
• Offer presence before words

You don’t need to say much.
Your regulated nervous system does the work.

💫 Being the calm parent / calm adult
This doesn’t mean never feeling stressed.

It means noticing when you are — and gently bringing yourself back.

Every time you do, you’re teaching your child:
“This is what calm feels like.”
“This is what safe feels like.”
And over time…
they learn to do it for themselves.

🌱 Co-regulation builds self-regulation
Connection first.
Safety first.

Calm together… before calm alone.
If you’re a parent or teacher, your nervous system is one of the most powerful tools you have 💛

20/01/2026

During my visits to schools I keep noticing the same thing:
Many children are simply not coping with the system.
Not because they are failing.
Not because they are difficult.
But because their stress levels are high, and when a child’s nervous system is under constant pressure, learning becomes much harder to access.
I’m also seeing this strain reflected in the adults around them. Teachers are doing their absolute best, but many are supporting children who are overwhelmed while feeling overwhelmed themselves.
Research supports what many schools are experiencing:
Rates of anxiety and mental health difficulties in children and young people remain high.
Teacher stress and burnout are at concerning levels.
High-pressure, outcomes-driven systems leave little space for regulation, creativity, or emotional recovery.
It brings me back to Sir Ken Robinson’s famous TED Talk, “Do Schools Kill Creativity?”
Years on, it still asks an important question:
With such a strong focus on academics and attainment, are we getting the balance right?
Because not all children thrive in systems built on pressure, pace and performance.
When I was at school, I wasn’t academic, but I was creative.
Creativity was where I felt capable.
It was how I made sense of the world.
It was where my confidence lived.
And I wonder how many children today are losing access to their creativity, not because it isn’t there, but because there’s little time or space for it to be invited in.
I’m going into schools with a highly creative wellbeing workshop, not to fix children, I’m going in to help them reconnect with something they already have, something many are missing right now.
✨ Their imagination.
Imagination is powerful.
It can fuel fear and anxiety…
but it can also be used to create fun, joy, courage and calm.
In my workshops, children learn that instead of their imagination running away with worries, they can use it intentionally:
To create a place where they feel safe
To design their own garden or inner world
To invite in characters, animals or helpers who support them
To practise feeling brave, calm, playful or strong
This is where the magic happens, not through analysing feelings, but through experiencing safety and choice.
I’m going into schools to help children access:
✅ a felt sense of safety
✅ a gentle way to regulate their nervous system
✅ their creativity through imagination and play
✅ a safe inner place they can return to — anytime
This approach reaches all children, especially those who struggle to sit still, who feel overwhelmed, who go quiet, or who express their stress through behaviour.
And when children feel safer in their bodies, something shifts.
Learning becomes more accessible.
Classrooms soften.
And teachers are no longer carrying quite so much alone.
A question worth sitting with:
If children can’t learn well when they don’t feel safe…
should creativity, imagination and wellbeing be seen as foundational, not optional?
I’d love to hear from parents, teachers and school leaders:
What are you noticing? What’s changed? And what do you feel children need most right now? 💛

15/01/2026

How My Magical Garden Supports Children with Trauma in Schools

In every classroom there are children carrying experiences we may never fully see or understand. Trauma doesn’t always announce itself. It can appear quietly as anxiety, emotional overwhelm, withdrawal, perfectionism, or difficulties with focus—or sometimes it remains completely hidden.
This is why My Magical Garden is offered to all children.

Rather than asking children to identify themselves or explain their experiences, every child is guided to create their own inner magical garden and, within it, a safe place they can return to whenever they need. This inclusive approach is especially supportive for children affected by trauma, because it provides safety without pressure, choice without demand, and support without disclosure.

Importantly, My Magical Garden was explored through a 6-month academic trial carried out in a trauma-informed school, allowing the approach to be embedded naturally within an environment already committed to understanding children through a trauma-aware lens.

Why this makes such a difference for children with trauma
1. Safety without having to explain
Children who have experienced trauma often struggle to feel safe. The garden offers an internal sense of safety without requiring children to talk about what they’ve been through.

2. Choice gently restores control
Trauma can take away a child’s sense of autonomy. In their garden, children choose everything—how it looks, who or what is there, and how it feels—helping rebuild trust in themselves.

3. Supports nervous system regulation
Through guided imagery and gentle language, children are supported to calm their nervous system. This is particularly powerful for those living in a constant state of fight, flight, or freeze.

4. A tool they can use anytime
Once created, the garden becomes a lifelong inner resource—accessible during lessons, transitions, exams, or moments of overwhelm—without needing adult intervention.

5. Inclusion without stigma
Because every child has a garden, no one is singled out. This protects vulnerable children and reduces shame, while still offering deep support.

6. Emotional expression in a safe, symbolic way
Children often express emotions symbolically before they can verbalise them. The garden allows this to happen naturally, at the child’s own pace.

🌈 The wider impact in schools
When all children have access to a safe inner place:
🔵 Classrooms feel calmer
🔵 Emotional literacy develops naturally
🔵 Children learn self-regulation skills early
🔵 Schools strengthen trauma-informed practice in a gentle, practical way

Often, the most powerful impact is unseen. A child quietly returning to their garden during a difficult moment. A pause instead of an outburst. A sense of safety that slowly reshapes how a child experiences school.

✨ We may not always know who is carrying trauma—but by giving every child access to My Magical Garden, we ensure no one is left without support. ✨

If you’d like to explore how My Magical Garden can support trauma-informed practice in your school or setting, I’d be very happy to connect.

14/01/2026

Yesterday I had the absolute pleasure of spending a second day at Westland Primary School, and from start to finish it was truly magical.

I began the day with Reception, running half-hour sessions, and they were simply incredible. Such enthusiasm, openness, and willingness to share their ideas. They embraced their Magical Gardens with such joy and imagination, proudly explaining what they had chosen for their garden.

Next came Year 2, who were just as wonderful. Halfway through the session we were interrupted by a fire alarm – but after a few deep, calming breaths together, they settled straight back in. It was amazing to see how quickly they reconnected with their gardens, sharing their ideas and creations with such focus and creativity. Some of their thoughts were truly inspiring.

After lunch, I worked with two Year 5 classes who did a fantastic job of connecting with their Magical Gardens. They shared their ideas thoughtfully and confidently, showing real depth in their reflections.

The final session of the day was a combined Year 5 and Year 6 class – and it was probably one of the most relaxed sessions I have ever experienced. For a full hour, all 60 children were completely engaged. No one spoke unless they were sharing. The calm in the room was tangible. The ideas were beautiful, and by the end we were all so relaxed it felt almost impossible to move and leave the space.

One moment that really stayed with me came from the flower page. One girl shared that when she touched her chosen flower, it stopped people from arguing and fighting and helped bring them closer together again. Such a powerful insight, shared so simply.

This is the true beauty of the Magical Garden. Children give us a window into their inner world and their perception of life through what they place in their garden and the magic they create within it. Their imagination, wisdom, and emotional awareness never fail to amaze me.

Thank you, Westland Primary School, for such a special day. 💚

If you would like more information about these school wellbeing workshops, please get in touch and I will send you the information.

13/01/2026

Back to Westlands Primary School today for my second school visit – and I’m really looking forward to it 🌱
Last week I had the pleasure of running Magical Garden sessions with Year 1, Year 3, Year 4 and Year 6, and today I’ll be meeting all of the other year groups. It’s always so special returning to a school and seeing the wider community engage with this work.

I absolutely love sharing the Magical Garden and inviting children into their imagination. For some children, it’s a lovely, one-off experience. For others, it becomes a tool they can carry with them, something they can return to again and again to help them feel safe, calm and in control.

The Magical Garden can be especially supportive for children experiencing anxiety, grief, or big emotions, giving them a gentle inner space where they can explore feelings at their own pace. I’m excited to see how the school continues to use it moving forward.

Westlands now also have the Magical Garden manual, packed with practical ideas for:
🔵 classroom use
🔵 nurture groups
🔵 1:1 support

This means the work doesn’t stop when the workshop ends – it becomes part of the school’s wider wellbeing toolkit 💚

If your school would like more information about Magical Garden workshops or how this approach can support emotional wellbeing, please feel free to get in touch. I’d love to chat about how it could work for your setting

12/01/2026

Neuroception – understanding why we react before we think

Last week, during my teenage workshop, we talked about neuroception – and it was a real eye-opener for the teens.

Neuroception is the nervous system’s ability to constantly scan our environment (and our inner world) for safety or danger. And here’s the key part:
👉 it happens without conscious thought.

Before the thinking brain gets involved, the nervous system has already decided:
“Am I safe right now… or not?”
This explains so much for teenagers.
Why their heart suddenly races in certain classrooms.
Why they snap at someone they care about.
Why they shut down, go quiet, or want to leave a situation fast.
Why a tone of voice, a look, or a memory can feel overwhelming.
Their body isn’t being dramatic.
It’s being protective.

In the workshop, many of the teens said things like:
“That makes sense now.”
“So I’m not broken?”
“That explains why I react before I can stop myself.”

And that’s the power of understanding neuroception.

When teens realise that their reactions are coming from a nervous system that’s trying to keep them safe, shame starts to soften. Self-blame eases. Curiosity replaces confusion.

From there, real change becomes possible.

Because once you understand what’s happening in your body, you can start to:

Notice triggers with more awareness
Pause instead of instantly reacting
Use tools to bring the body back to safety

Respond with choice, not autopilot
Knowledge doesn’t stop triggers from happening – but it changes the relationship we have with them.

And for teenagers especially, that understanding can be life-changing.
If we can teach young people why their bodies react the way they do, we give them compassion, language, and tools they can carry into adulthood.

Understanding neuroception really can make all the difference 💛

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1-2 Frank's Bridge Cottages
Headcorn
TN279SX

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Monday	9am - 6pm
Tuesday	9am - 6pm
Wednesday	9am - 6pm
Thursday	9am - 6pm
Friday	9am - 6pm
Saturday	10am - 5pm

Website

http://www.stay-calm.co.uk/

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Emotional Wellbeing

Stay Calm supports parents, teachers and carers to help children and teenagers with mental health issues, in particular anxiety. It’s also also about supporting parents themselves as they navigate through the parenting process. It can be challenging and not always easy so I like to help parents find their way and feel empowered. We all can only do our best and sometimes it helps to reach out and get some support. It’s so important that we look after our own emotional wellbeing so that we can then support our children.

I am interested in all areas that impact our mental health and I’m always looking for ways to help make life a little calmer. Mindfulness is the main focus of what I do as it has such an amazing affect at combatting anxiety and sleep issues, as well as helping with behavioural issues.

I’m also fascinated with the link between food and mood so I like to share information on this as the impact of the wrongs foods can have a massive impact on behaviour and exacerbate anxiety and depression.

Stay Calm is a space where you can explore different things that you had maybe not considered. If you enjoy articles, blogs etc then please feel free to share them so that they can reach a wider audience and invite friends along to the page if you feel it will benefit them.

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