02/09/2025
This!
Please understand that they wanted your reaction to their disrespect, because then they could use your reaction to paint you as the problem and deflect from their own toxic and bad behaviours.
That’s the cycle they thrive on: provoke, trigger, and then play the victim. They want you to raise your voice, lose your calm, or step out of character, because once you do, they suddenly have “proof” that you are the issue. They will conveniently erase the weeks, months, or even years of subtle disrespect, manipulation, and emotional games that led up to that moment, and instead highlight only your reaction.
This is not an accident—it’s a tactic. By making you look “unstable” or “overly emotional,” they get to hide their own disrespectful actions and redirect the spotlight onto you. That way, they don’t have to take responsibility for what they’ve done. They don’t have to admit to the lies, the gaslighting, the broken trust, or the constant disrespect. Instead, they point to your reaction as the entire story.
But here’s the truth: your reaction is not the problem. Your reaction is the result of being pushed, provoked, and disrespected. Your reaction is evidence that you are human, that you have boundaries, and that you finally reached a point where you refused to remain silent.
Don’t let anyone shame you for responding to mistreatment. And don’t let them rewrite the narrative to make you the villain of a story that they authored with their own actions.
Real strength is not in holding onto their version of the story — it’s in knowing the truth, standing firm in it, and refusing to be manipulated. Protect your peace, protect your energy, and remember: those who truly know you, those who genuinely care, will always see beyond the one moment they try to use against you.
You are not the problem. Their toxic behaviour is. And no amount of twisting the truth will ever change that.