27/02/2026
IS Your PLAN for pain relief based on knowledge or on the stories that shaped your expectations ??
Every week on labour ward I meet women who are about to do the most powerful work of their lives.
I cared for a first-time mother in early labour. Her contractions were mild, irregular, just starting to build, but the moment she entered the delivery room, fear arrived with her.
Before labour had truly started she requested an epidural. Not because the pain was so strong, but because she fear that will be painful.
When she asked for the epidural, we sat down and carefully discussed the stage she was in. That early labour is often best supported by movement, mobility and allowing the baby find optimal position in the pelvis. I explained epidural aspects as well: IV access, continuous monitoring, possible bladder catheterisation and the reduced ability to move freely. Presenting both benefits and consequences clearly and respectfully. Despite the conversation, her decision was already shaped by fear. In the labour room she didn’t have emotional space to fully process new informations.. That is why preparation before birth matters so much. When labour begins, it is not the time to learn from the beginning, but to draw on what you already understand and trust;
Epidural analgesia can be an appropriate option in long, exhausting labour.
But in early labour, when the body is still trying to find its rhythm, epidural can sometimes slow that rhythm down.
Mum had epidural, the contractions began to slow and synthetic oxytocin was needed through an IV drip to stimulate labour again.
The epidural allowed her to rest, but it also reduced her ability to feel her body’s signals.
When the final stage arrived, the powerful, instinctive phase of pushing,the natural sensations that guide a mother to work with her baby were very reduced.
The pushing phase became prolonged. This stage last too long, both mother and baby become tired.
Ultimately, instrumental assistance was required and forceps were used to help her baby girl be born safely.
Her daughter was born in satisfactory condition, but there were visible marks on her face from the forceps,visible reminders of a birth that required intervention.
Because the birth was instrumental and physically demanding, the mother was extremely tired afterwards. The first golden hour of skin-to-skin contact was shortened and breastfeeding did not begin easily.
The baby needed time to settle after a difficult birth and due to tenderness around her head, some feeding positions were uncomfortable for her. It took about 24 hours before feeding improved and the facial marks will likely take one to two weeks to fully fade.
Afterwards, the mother said, “I wish I had prepared differently. I was more afraid of pain than I was prepared for birth.”
She had listened to frightening birth stories for months, read dramatic accounts online, but had not invested time in structured, professional preparation that explains how labour progress and how the body works. Her fear had been building long before she stepped into the delivery room.
We prepare carefully for weddings, for travel, for marathons — researching, learning, investing in the right guidance. But birth, one of the most significant physical and emotional events of life, is sometimes approached with far less preparation.
Nine months is time. Time to learn how contractions build. Time to understand what pain means physiologically. Time to explore options including epidural in a way that feels informed rather than reactive.
I gently ask:
Are you preparing your mind as carefully as you are preparing the nursery ?
As you approach your own birth, what do you truly know about labour and where is that knowledge coming from?
What are your thoughts on a birth like this and what are your own plans when it comes to labour and pain relief?
Share your thoughts
This is a space for real questions, real women and real decisions made with a clear understanding of what may come next.
Jd
