01/04/2025
Hello!
As you know, I’m always looking for innovative ways to make acupuncture more accessible — and after much thought (and a surprisingly successful trial with my mum’s Zoom account), I’m thrilled to announce a brand-new service:
Remote Acupuncture via FaceTime.
Yes — starting this month, you will be able to book virtual appointments from the comfort of your own home. You’ll receive a hand-delivered Acupuncture Starter Kit, complete with:
• Sterile needles (pre-counted and neatly labelled)
• An instruction leaflet (with diagrams drawn by me — apologies in advance)
• A calming playlist (featuring pan flutes and gentle whale song)
During your session, I’ll guide you step-by-step via FaceTime, carefully instructing you on where to place each needle, how deep to insert it, and what to do if the cat tries to help.
Advanced options include:
• Self-cupping using a hairdryer and jam jars
• DIY Gua Sha with the edge of a spoon
• And for the particularly brave: electro-acupuncture using a phone charger
Safety first, of course — helmets and oven mitts are encouraged for first-timers.
Appointments are limited, so please do let me know if you’d like to be part of this groundbreaking (and potentially poky) new chapter in holistic health.
Warm regards,
Vanessa
P.S.
April Fools!
While remote acupuncture might be a stretch, in-person appointments are still the gold standard — and I’d love to see you soon for a proper, professionally poked session.
