17/11/2025
How Unresolved Family Patterns Shape Workplace Confidence
Fahreen Jon | London Talk Therapy
There comes a point in our professional lives where we realise our work confidence has very little to do with our competence. It has far more to do with the systems we were raised in.
I hear it from women across senior roles all the time.
One recently shared that she grew up in a home where the men spoke and the women stayed quiet. Now she finds herself shrinking around male colleagues, despite being capable, respected, and high-performing.
This is far more common than people realise.
Your mind knows you’re confident.
Your nervous system remembers something else.
When a childhood environment teaches you to:
• stay small to keep the peace
• speak less so others stay comfortable
• defer to male authority
• avoid conflict
• earn approval instead of owning your place
…it becomes natural to freeze in meetings, lose your voice around certain personalities, or overthink every word in case it lands “wrong”.
None of this means you’re weak. It means you were conditioned to survive a system that no longer exists.
The breakthrough comes when you start separating who you were taught to be from who you actually are. That’s when your voice stabilises. Your confidence anchors. You stop negotiating your presence in rooms where you fully belong.
If this resonates and you want to explore this more personally, you’re welcome to email me. I’ll help you map out what’s happening and what needs to shift so your confidence becomes something you can rely on, not something you fight for.
Email: contact@londontalktherapy.com
for a free consultation
All content © London Talk Therapy. Please credit when sharing.