08/12/2025
Why the rush?
Why does it feel like grieving is so rushed these days?
Most cultures tend to follow some sort of mourning period, historically these periods used to be quite long (even lasting up to a year in some cases). However in our modern life the period seems to have gotten shorter and shorter.
Most organisations will give you a couple of days compassionate leave from work, (if you're lucky you might get a few more days). In our culture here in UK, there is an intense mourning period where we host visitors who come to offer condolences (afsos); that lasts up until the funeral. This plays a dual role; 1. It provides support for the family, showing us how much our loved one was loved; 2. It provides structure and focus on remembrance, prayer and chardi kala (uplifted spirit).
Sikhi emphasises acceptance of hukam (divine will), so mourning is not prolonged.
But that return to work? And the 'new normal'? It's not even so much as the return to work, it is the guilt(?) that comes with moving on so quickly. How do you carry on so soon, it seems almost incorrect to not honour her for longer.
Yet as I write this, Waheguru himself has given me the answer above - accept hukam and stay in chardi kala. 🙏
