04/02/2026
The past five years have been the hardest years of my life.
I’ve been tested and broken in ways I never, ever expected.
Five years ago today, we received the most devastating, life-changing news . Your diagnosis 💔
You were only 51 years old. The same age I am now.
A healthy, fit, beautiful man, with your whole life still ahead of you.
Just three months later, you died in my arms 💔
I honestly didn’t think I would survive it. I didn’t know how I would keep going. Losing you changed me forever, and only those who have suffered deep, profound loss truly understand that kind of pain.
Grief is a silent torture.
The mental anguish. The heartache you carry unseen by the world.
And although I was surrounded by love and support, this has still been the loneliest journey I’ve ever had to trudge.
Here I am, five years on, still navigating loss, trauma, and grief.
There is no handbook for this. No map. No timeline.
But God doesn’t give us anything we can’t get through… right?
There has been loss. And lessons. And so much letting go.
Moments when I truly didn’t know how I’d take another step forward.
But one thing I never lost was my faith or my hope.
My faith is deep and unshakeable.
Faith in life.
Faith in timing.
Faith in myself.
And somehow… I’m still standing.
Still showing up for myself every single day.
I have a deep, quiet knowing that what’s coming now is better, not easier, but aligned.
I truly believe God has been carrying me through every step, even when I didn’t realise it.
What broke me also shaped me.
And now, with a heart that has known deep pain, I can finally feel deep gratitude too.
I honour how far I’ve come, and I trust what’s ahead.
My heart is still open. My faith is still crazy strong.
I will honour you by living my life fully stepping out of my own shadow, embracing everything meant for me, and never forgetting how precious this life truly is.
Life is sacred.
Life is fragile.
And life is meant to be lived 🤍🙏
I carry love, not fear.
I choose life, not survival.
And for the first time in a long time…
Im ready 🙏❤️
