Rachel Jee - Independent Funeral Celebrant

19/12/2025

Warning - it’s a long post!
I was dreading this past week a little, I knew it was going to take a lot out of me but it ended up not only being exhausting but one of the best weeks I’ve ever had as a celebrant. Like I say to my mum all the time, when she pulls her face when I’m busy - if I could save everyone, I would, I’d earn a fortune! But I can’t, so, I do the very next best thing and make their final farewell the best I can. I’ve put in lots of miles and been to Dukinfield, check out the fire service photo, unfortunately that wasn’t mine 😂
Blackley, Oldham, Altrincham, Manchester, Southern Cemetery and Vale Royal (what a place!) I managed to get a couple of photos and Arley Hall. I’ve worn an Oldham Athletic scarf and a pink flower. I’ve met a lady who writes music in LA with singers you will know but she’s recorded a track herself to be released and I know it’ll be big - she and her siblings were humble and amazing. A Russian lady who travelled from Moscow for her husband’s funeral - despite the language barrier we did it and she was one of the warmest people I’ve ever met. And so many other amazing people. I’ve laughed, I’ve cried but I have literally smiled all week. And I can’t not mention the funeral directors I’m so lucky to work with. The sad part is that all of these wonderful people have one less in their family, made even worse as it’s so close to Christmas. Every one of them will be in my thoughts.

18/12/2025

For anyone it might help…..❤️

FIRST CHRISTMAS IN HEAVEN

It’s my first Christmas in heaven,
I’ve been dreading it all through the year.
Knowing that you will be lonely,
lost to the joy and the cheer.

I’ve been sending sweet robins to find you,
and feathers have brought you my love.
I’ve been whispering secrets to raindrops,
hoping you’ll hear me above.

It’s my first Christmas in heaven,
it’s a wonderful place to exist…
And the only sadness that finds me,
is wishing I wasn’t so missed.

Because if you look closely, you’ll see me,
in every small thing that you do.
I’m the joy that sneaks in through the window,
when you stop to admire the view.

I’m the laughter that gasps from your sadness
when your soul frees itself from this pain.
I’m the comfort that warms through your blanket
as you wrap yourself up from the rain.

It’s my first Christmas in heaven,
and they told me that this would be tough.
All I can do, is remind you, you’re loved
and I’ll pray, every day, it’s enough.

Donna Ashworth

(I wrote this by request and I hope it brings comfort to anyone who needs it tonight).

18/11/2025

If Christmas is hard,

If you’ve lost someone dear.

Just look in your heart,

And you’ll know they’re still here.

The star in the sky,

The light falling snow.

The robin outside,

It seems like they know.

If this is a time,

When you’re struggling through.

Just do what you can,

For what matters, is you.

There’s no need to be merry,

There’s no need to be bright.

Just do what you can,

It will all be alright.

Source: ***s Design

07/11/2025

04/10/2025

Gifts come in all shapes and sizes. A big bag of bramleys from the garden of a gentleman I conducted the service for, last week. The most beautiful smelling, juiciest apples and there were enough to make these two lovely crumbles, ready for the oven 🍁🍏🥧🤤

01/09/2025

My friend is a Joy Division fan and she doesn’t live in Manchester, so, whilst I was at Macclesfield Crematorium today, I thought I’d seek out Ian Curtis’s final resting place so I could send her some photos. It made me sad, it was so unloved. Yet in other ways, it was loved by those who didn’t know him and had never met him. There’s all sorts of trinkets that have been left, including a 7” Bucks Fizz vinyl! A T-shirt and a pack of Chinese ci******es. People left these things for their own reasons. So terribly sad that one adored by so many, and so many like him, didn’t want to carry on their life 😔❤️

27/08/2025

I don’t know if he really said this but it sounds good anyway…..

Jim Carrey once said: Grief is not just an emotion—it’s an unraveling, a space where something once lived but is now gone. It carves through you, leaving a hollow ache where love once resided.

In the beginning, it feels unbearable, like a wound that will never close. But over time, the raw edges begin to mend. The pain softens, but the imprint remains—a quiet reminder of what once was. The truth is, you never truly "move on." You move with it. The love you had does not disappear; it transforms. It lingers in the echoes of laughter, in the warmth of old memories, in the silent moments where you still reach for what is no longer there. And that’s okay.

Grief is not a burden to be hidden. It is not a weakness to be ashamed of. It is the deepest proof that love existed, that something beautiful once touched your life. So let yourself feel it. Let yourself mourn. Let yourself remember.

There is no timeline, no “right” way to grieve. Some days will be heavy, and some will feel lighter. Some moments will bring unexpected waves of sadness, while others will fill you with gratitude for the love you were lucky enough to experience.

Honor your grief, for it is sacred. It is a testament to the depth of your heart. And in time, through the pain, you will find healing—not because you have forgotten, but because you have learned how to carry both love and loss together

14/08/2025

Facebook has reminded me today that it’s the anniversary of the first day of my funeral career journey. I’d temped since the January at Co-op head office which confirmed to me, the path I wanted to follow. Today, in 2013 was my first day working in a funeral home where I completed my NVQ. From a funeral arranger for 3 years, I moved to head office again, not through choice, I went to work on a project but I didn’t return to my branch, choosing to stay there for a while. I left the co-op in 2018 when I moved into funeral pre planning which led to redundancy which brought me here…..here to my happy place 🥰

11/08/2025

I had the privilege of conducting a service in this beautiful church last week, I’m just sorry I didn’t take my phone in with me to photograph the inside…..hopefully I’ll have another opportunity. They just want the church to be used so they allow celebrants in😆. Lovely people look after it too 😊
It just goes to show that there are different options out there, one size doesn’t fit all

08/08/2025

The last 6 weeks or so have been truly humbling. On several occasions, I’ve either been asked by friends to carry out their loved ones services or I’ve had calls from people who have seen me take a service and they’ve chosen me to conduct the service of their own loved one. But to be asked to give the service of one of my own family members is something else, although he did always joke “you can do mine” and I thought I’d be retired by the time that day came and he probably did too, but I wasn’t. I know he’d comment on this post, but sadly he can’t. I hope he’d have approved just like I hope all of the people I help to say goodbye to, would have too.

25/07/2025

I’m not sure how to put this week into words but I’m glad it’s over. I’ve sat with the families of and stood in front of hundreds, and I truly mean, hundreds of people to talk about 5 people in my own age group, people who should still be here who have left young families behind. It’s extremely humbling, and such a privilege, but it shouldn’t be happening.

This poem was used today in my final service;

The Friend
In a circle of friends, the one who dies first
Is the friend you will never forget;
This is the death that unhinges you
From the trappings of every day life
And makes you – suddenly – absurdly grateful
For each new breath – beginning with this one.

This is the death that could break you apart
In every way possible; that persuades you-
In memory of that friend – to turn away
From whatever refuses to speak to your heart
From whatever threatens to numb your soul
From whatever it is that revels in death.

Yet this, too, is the friend you need by your side.
Listen. Together they urge you: live your life.

19/06/2025

The past few months have been really rubbish. In fact, all this year has, with friends being very unwell, relatives of friends passing away and their pets too. It’s been a shocking year. And then at the end of May I suffered a bereavement myself with a much loved member of my family, who was too young and it was quite sudden, and honestly, my first experience of real grief. Then, last Friday, very suddenly and without warning, I had to make the very difficult decision to say goodbye to my fur baby, Poppy, the cat I never wanted but who became my baby and best mate over the last 8 years, the one I spoke to every day and I’ve cried every day since. So, to everyone of you who is also going through something horrible right now, lots of love and strength to you 💔❤️