24/11/2025
So true…
People often say,
“She just doesn’t want to do anything anymore.”
“He refuses every activity.”
“He’s not interested.”
When someone is living with dementia, activities can feel confusing, overwhelming, childish, or simply too fast.
Sometimes the room is too noisy.
Sometimes the task doesn’t make sense.
Sometimes the instructions come too quickly or they don’t recognise the object in front of them.
Sometimes they’re tired, hungry, frightened, or in pain…
and all the body can manage is “No.”
We make a mistake when we assume they’re choosing to do nothing.
Often they’re choosing safety.
Or they’re choosing the little bit of control they still have.
Or maybe they’re protecting themselves from feeling embarrassed.
And sometimes people have been conditioned over time to sit quietly with nothing to do.
If you’re offered nothing long enough, it becomes normal.
And then “not wanting anything” becomes a habit, not a preference.
A good activity meets the person where they already are.
Not where the timetable says they should be.
Have you seen someone “refuse” something… but later accept it when it was offered differently?
Share if you feel comfortable.
