Lena Brailsford Therapy & Support

28/01/2026

16/01/2026

Hands, Roles, and Staying Connected

There’s something quietly powerful about hands.

Hands hold.
Hands guide.
Hands rest.
Hands let go.

My mum used to say our family was like a hand — each finger different, each one needed, all connected. I come back to that image often.

In families, we often fall into roles without choosing them:
The Watcher.
The Peacemaker.
The Disrupter.
The Dreamer.
The Fixer.
The Questioner.

For a long time, these roles can feel permanent — especially when we’re just trying to survive, cope, and get through the day.

But roles aren’t meant to stay fixed.
They stretch.
They soften.
They change as life changes.

I see this now with my own children. Their hands still reach for mine — just differently:
Sometimes for guidance.
Sometimes for reassurance.
Sometimes for space.
Sometimes just for quiet presence.

And my role shifts too — less doing for, more standing with.
Less fixing, more anchoring.

The same is true in adult families. Old dynamics can replay automatically — who observes, who smooths things over, who shakes things up — even when those roles no longer serve anyone.

Connection doesn’t come from everyone doing more.
Often, it comes from allowing ourselves — and each other — to simply be more.

To stay connected while letting roles evolve.

Sometimes, the first step back to harmony isn’t a big conversation — it’s shared time, lightness, and the quiet permission for things to be different now.

Have you noticed roles shifting in your family as children grow, parents age, or life changes?
Are there roles you’re gently questioning or redefining this year? What about your kids , what roles do you see them in? How could this help them@as they get older?

💛 Lena

08/01/2026

Rejection Sensitivity, Regulation & Relationships

Why understanding matters more than fixing

There’s a difference between helping someone regulate and trying to change who they are.

Rejection sensitivity,whether formally named or not, is not a flaw to be trained out of a person.
It’s a nervous system that feels things deeply and quickly.

I’ve seen how this can shape a life.

When sensitivity goes unsupported, it often turns into defensiveness.
Not because someone wants to push others away, but because they are constantly protecting themselves from feeling hurt.

Over time, that protection can strain relationships.
Comments feel personal.
Feedback feels unsafe.
Reciprocity feels impossible.

I’ve watched this play out across decades in adults I love.
And now I’m seeing early echoes of it in the next generation.

That’s why I’m so passionate about this work.

Not to “toughen children up”.
Not to ask families to walk on eggshells.
And not to erase a trait that often comes with empathy, creativity and insight.

But to build regulation first, so sensitivity doesn’t become a source of lifelong pain.

When a child (or adult) learns:
• how to recognise when their body has gone into threat
• how to pause before reacting
• how to recover from emotional impact
• how to stay connected rather than defensive

Something powerful shifts.

They don’t stop feeling deeply —
they stop feeling constantly under attack.

This is especially important because the world won’t adapt around them.
People will speak without thinking.
Comments will land badly.
Misunderstandings will happen.

Resilience isn’t about preventing that.
It’s about giving someone the internal safety and skills to survive it without losing themselves or others.

This is the work I do with children, parents and adults.
Quietly.
Relationally.
With depth and respect for neurodiversity.

It’s not quick.
It’s not generic.
And it isn’t something I offer casually because it matters too much for that.

If this resonates, for you, your child, or someone you love , you’re not alone.
And support can make make a real difference

Lena 💛
DM to book
Photos from the collection
“Mummy & Rosa” by Rowan xx

06/01/2026

Seeing Children Clearly and Honouring the Work This Takes

Yesterday my son said something that stopped me in my tracks.

We were talking in general about children who sometimes “create situations” at school or at home , I was suggesting alternative ways to help him compassionately navigate these and get adult the support that’s needed and he said:

“I shouldn’t have to tell adults how to look after children. That’s not a child’s job.
Adults are meant to notice and help us.”

There was no blame in his voice. Just truth.

So often, children who struggle with regulation,especially those with ADHD traits,are labelled as the problem. The naughty one. The disruptive one. The one who’s always in trouble. Over time, this chips away at confidence, belonging, and self-worth.

But more often than not, what we’re seeing isn’t poor behaviour — it’s a nervous system under strain.

When children don’t get the sensory, emotional or relational input they need, their bodies find another way to communicate. That shows up everywhere: at school, at home, in clubs, in the community. It isn’t about anyone failing … it’s about understanding what sits underneath behaviour.

I share this as a parent and as a specialist teacher who has spent many years supporting children, families and staff — both inside and outside of school. This work requires experience, attunement and skill. When adults shift from managing behaviour to supporting regulation, everything changes , not just for the child, but for the whole system around them.

I also want to say something clearly and kindly.

I’m still a parent. Still a friend. Still someone who chats at the school gate, listens, laughs and cares. Those everyday conversations matter to me, and I don’t want to lose them.

What I’m being more intentional about this year is the difference between connection and consultation.

When conversations move into strategy, assessment, patterns over time or “what should I do?”, that’s professional work, and it deserves the same respect as any other skilled profession. Protecting that boundary allows me to stay generous where it matters most.

This year, I’m choosing to work with parents and professionals who are ready to invest in thoughtful, meaningful support, not just quick fixes and not invisible labour.

If you’re a parent or teacher who feels stuck, worried about a child who is struggling, or wants to understand behaviour rather than battle it, this work may be for you.

Sometimes the biggest shift happens when we stop asking children to cope better…
and start supporting them properly.

💛 Lena
Ps
Photo by Rowan x

16/12/2025

A reflection on SEN funding, diagnoses — and the system we’re asking children to survive or theive within.

There has been a lot of discussion recently about the UK government’s announcement to invest more money into SEN provision within mainstream schools, including increased access to multidisciplinary teams.

And to be clear —
collaboration matters.
Early input matters.
Joined-up thinking matters.

But I want to gently name something that often goes unsaid, especially for parents holding hope that this will finally make things easier for their child.

👉 Even with more professionals involved, many children will still struggle.

Because the core issue is not simply a lack of diagnosis, funding, or services.

The deeper issue is the system children are being asked to function within.

Mainstream education is under immense pressure:
• tightly packed curricula
• constant assessment and comparison
• rapid transitions and short lessons
• limited time for regulation, recovery, or emotional processing

For children with sensitive or vulnerable nervous systems , whether diagnosed, awaiting assessment, or never labelled at all - this environment can keep them in a near-constant state of stress.

And a dysregulated nervous system cannot learn, connect, or thrive to its full potential.

This is true in both public and private education.
Funding may buy smaller classes or additional interventions, but it cannot override a nervous system that feels unsafe.

I know this both professionally and personally.

I have worked in education since 1998 , as a primary teacher, specialist teacher, autism outreach teacher, holistic therapist, and family support practitioner. I’ve supported hundreds of children, parents, and schools across Derbyshire and beyond.

I am also neurodivergent myself, undiagnosed until my 50s, having had a “successful” career within this very system.

I didn’t cope because the system was kind.
I coped because my parents and my lived experience, taught me how to protect my regulation, my self-worth and my belief that I was enough.

I thrived as a teacher because I carried this understanding into my work. I sought to empower children, families, and staff by creating conditions where regulation came first, by practising what I preached. (Sometimes that meant singing before work, or having a boogie before home.)

I wasn’t always popular.
I spoke up when I saw poor practice.
I challenged systems that harmed rather than helped.

But I also advocated, mentored, inspired, and trained — always with compassion. I built my own resilience to cope with toxicity in the workplace, within education, and at times in my wider community — because this is who I am.

A passionate, yet compassionate professional.

I will always work with the person in front of me, not the label they may carry.
I will always honour their unique light.

Because that is what I believe makes the biggest difference.

Not labels alone.
Not reports alone.
Not even well-intentioned funding announcements.

Children need to feel safe, be given time, have attuned adults and environments that understand one simple truth:

👉 Behaviour is communication ,not failure.

So if you are a parent reading this and thinking,
“We have the support… but my child is still struggling,”
please hear this:

It does not mean the support hasn’t worked.
It does not mean something is wrong with your child.

It may simply mean the system is still asking too much of their nervous system.

And this is where real change begins, not with fixing children, but with truly understanding what they are being asked to cope with.

So here’s a gentle invitation

If this resonates, you’re very welcome to comment, share your thoughts, or message me privately. These conversations matter.

I also offer free discovery calls for parents who want a calm, knowledgeable space to think things through: whether that’s around school, regulation, SEN processes, diagnoses, or simply what next. I also offer holistic treatments to help your body and mind regulate , becuase YOU are essential and key in helping your child thrive.

My work is always bespoke,many families come to me because I bridge education, nervous system regulation, family support, and lived experience — often acting as a kind of multidisciplinary team in one steady place.

No pressure.
No fixing.
Just a 100% human connection, understanding, clarity with next steps that feel possible.

💛
Lena

11/12/2025

🌸 This week’s ritual drink: 🍵✨ Beetroot & Ginger Latte

Come in, breathe, and just be.
While you wait, enjoy a short visualisation to release, open, and invite calm and hope into your morning. 🌿

Then savour your latte — a nourishing blend of beetroot, ginger & raw crystallised coconut nectar. With a milk of your choice crafted to support your mind, body, and heart.

A little ritual in a cup — a pause, a sip, a moment of peace.
Join us at — a place where you can just be. 💛

09/12/2025

🌿 A Gentle Invitation to Parents Who Are Trying Their Best

I’m writing this not as a practitioner or teacher, but as a mum walking this road in real time — messy, beautiful, exhausting and everything in between.
Lately, everywhere I go — playgrounds, clubs, pubs — parents keep quietly sharing the same thing:

“My child is so tired… more emotional… more irritable… struggling.”

And it’s not just end-of-day tired.
It’s emotional + neurological tired.
When children reach that level of overwhelm, the world becomes harder to step into:
• Clubs feel too loud
• School feels too big
• Friendships feel complicated
• Even fun things feel like “too much”
And as parents, we want to encourage, push, protect… or do the opposite and let them withdraw completely. I swing between both too.
But here’s the truth I keep coming back to:
When a child is overwhelmed, adding more isn’t support — it’s pressure.
What they need first is safety, regulation and one person who truly gets them.

I’m doing this with my own son.
Some days he can manage the world.
Some days the covers go over his head. Both are valid.

And what I know is this:
✨ Before clubs… comes connection
✨ Before confidence… comes co-regulation
✨ Before independence… comes safety
And the person who provides that doesn’t have to be perfect — just present.
So this isn’t an offer, a programme or a sign-up.
Just a gentle invitation:

If your child is overwhelmed, slow down with them. Do something they love with zero expectation. Let them rediscover their spark at their pace.

And if you feel alone — no family nearby, no long-term mates on your doorstep — please know you’re not the only one. I’m walking this too.

I’m DBS-checked, experienced, imperfect, adaptable, fully human… and if you ever need a safe adult to sit alongside your child or you in those first tiny steps back into the world, I’m here.
No pressure. Just connection.

If this resonates, or you’re seeing these shifts at home too, comment or message me. I’d genuinely love to hear your experience.

💛 Lena

P.S. I have no photos of me doing this work — because I’m actually doing it. And Mark can’t take a photo to save his life 😂

08/12/2025

When everything else feels like a no… what is still a yes?

This weekend, surrounded by family and football stories from across the world, I had a moment of clarity.

Even when school feels hard.
When behaviour bubbles.
When the world feels loud and overwhelming…
Sometimes there is still one YES.

For many children (my son included) football isn’t just a game.
It’s rhythm, regulation, routine, belonging.
Clear rules. Movement. Fresh air. Community. Release.
And in a world that feels like too much… that structure feels like safety.

After 20+ years supporting children — and now walking this path beside my own — I know this isn’t just about football.

It’s about the thing that anchors your child.
The thing that brings them back to themselves when everything else feels impossible.

Right now, I’m simply listening to children who are struggling with:
• overwhelm
• low-level school avoidance
• anxiety
• social withdrawal
• dysregulation

Not to label. Not to fix. Just to hear.

If your child (boy or girl) is finding school or social life hard right now, but still has one thing that lights a spark 🔥, I’d love to listen.

This isn’t a programme.
It’s the beginning of a journey.

Comment or message “VOICE” and I’ll reach out privately.

And to the children…
You are not lazy, naughty or broken.
You are responding intelligently to a world that doesn’t always fit.

And together, we can build something better.
Lena 💛

P.S. After a week of overwhelm, the one thing he never refused… was football. The screenshot says it all , the week ended in a high⚽️💖

02/12/2025

✨ Honouring the season when school starts to feel hard ✨

If your child is becoming more overwhelmed, anxious or resistant to school right now…
pause before you panic.
Winter is not a season of pushing.
It is a season of returning inward.
In nature, everything slows:
Trees release their leaves
Animals rest
The world goes quiet
Yet our children are expected to sit still, perform, socialise, process, achieve — in buildings full of noise, pressure and artificial light. And it all culminates and intensifies in December- changes to routines, bright lights, elves, sweets, non stop music activity .
Some children feel this disconnect more than others.
And their bodies respond by pulling back, shutting down or saying “I can’t”.
This isn’t failure.
It’s instinct.

Instead of fighting it, try to honour it.

🌿 Gentle invitations for your child and you to try perfect for this season
• Bake something together (no perfection needed)
• Create simple crafts (cutting, sticking, colouring, threading)
• Sit under a tree or walk without a destination
Creativity and nature regulate the nervous system in ways words never can.

🌿 And for you, the parent (because you matter too):
Regulation isn’t just a glass of wine at the end of the day (though that’s ok too 😉)
It’s in the small mindful moments:
• feeling warm water on your hands
• seeking and enjoying the colour of the sky, your jumper
• slow deep breaths
• singing loud and off key in the car to work after drop off
Your child doesn’t just learn from what you say.
They learn from the energy you inhabit.
Teach them that peace isn’t found out there…
It lives inside them.
Waiting to be remembered.

And that inner warmth?
That’s resilience ☀️
Text or Dm if you need a little TLC
With love and light always lena xx

28/11/2025

This morning started with a message from a friend.
She’d seen a post from someone clearly overwhelmed and instantly thought of me 🥰

I opened it wanting to help — that familiar “I can hold this” feeling —
but the comments were already flooded.
Advice. Noise. Pressure.

And I realised adding my voice would have been just another demand.
So I stepped back.

I’d already made some big decisions that morning — cancelling a Reiki share, giving myself space instead of holding it for others. Not easy for me at all.

After school drop-off, I sat in my car with a cold Ovaltine and a brioche — total granny comfort, but exactly what I needed.
It was the first still moment of the day.

And I felt this truth:

I could have been either person in that Facebook post —
the one needing support or the one offering it.

So many parents I work with feel the same.
Not failing — just exhausted.
Trying to make decisions from an empty cup.

Later, with a little more space, I messaged a small networking group I now had the space to attend and said:
“I don’t know what to do. Seeing you would be good medicine but i’m tired can someone choose for me?”

And they did.
Anna decided for me, and the rest softly echoed:
“Rest. We’ve got you.”

That’s exactly how I support families too —
not with pressure or long lists,
but with grounded presence and gentle next steps.

I sit with you in the car moments, the cold-Ovaltine moments, the ‘I can’t decide’ moments —
and help you find steady ground again.

Regulated parents create regulated homes.
And regulated homes help children shine. ✨

If you’re in one of those moments today… I get it.
I was there this morning.
And my door is open. 💛

The sun is on my face now, the sky is blue, and peace has found me again.
Namaste 🌸

📩 team@lenabrailsford.com
📱 text only: 07713318130

27/11/2025

✨ A Morning Ritual at Fig Coffee House ✨

Beginning next Thursday 4th December,at 9:30am, we invite you to start your morning with calm, nourishment, and a moment just for you. 🌞

Come in, take a deep breath, and allow yourself to simply be.
Place your order, settle into the stillness, and let the world soften around you. 🌿

As you wait, you’ll be guided into a gentle visualisation — a soft space to release, open, and welcome peace into your day.
During this moment, you’ll also discover the story behind the ingredients — and how they quietly support your mind, body, and heart, helping you ease into a deeper sense of presence. 🌸

This week’s offering is our organic cacao & chaga hot chocolate, sweetened with coconut nectar — grounding, heart-opening, and crafted with intention. As you sip, Lena will help you anchor the experience, turning it into a mindful ritual you can return to any time. 🍫💛

Each week, we’ll celebrate a new drink from our alternative menu — from turmeric chai to beetroot & ginger — each with its own warmth, story, and nourishing qualities. ✨

We close with a moment of gratitude, gently grounding you for the day ahead — held in love, presence, and peace.

✨ All included for the usual price of a hot drink.
Join us at Fig Coffee House, Matlock Bath — a place where you can just be. 💛