Sacred Love of Self - Spiritual Healer/Intuitive

01/12/2025

01/12/2025

01/12/2025

01/12/2025

IT'S NOT "WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?" IT'S "WHAT HAPPENED TO ME & HOW DID IT SHAPE ME?"

What happened (the event)
-Big T or little t trauma
-One-time or ongoing
-Relational, developmental, or environmental
• breakup or divorce
• A global pandemic
• A traumatic birth or surgery
• Cancer
• A car crash
• childhood bullying
• An emotionally unavailable parent
• A physical or sexual assault
• Chronic microaggressions
• An unexpected loss

How it felt (your experience)
• "I don't belong."
• “No one came for me."
• "I had to freeze or shut down."
• "I was powerless and confused.”
• " have to stay strong for everyone else."
• "It's not ok to feel."
• “I’ll never be safe again"
• “It's my fault"
• "I'm not good enough"

How it shaped you (The Effects)
• anxiety
• shame and guilt
• emotional numbness
• perfectionism
• Nightmares, or intrusive thoughts
• Hypervigilance (always scanning for threat)
• "People pleasing" and overfunctoning
• Body tension, fatigue, or chronic pain
• Disconnection in relationships
• Chronic irritability
• Avoidance
• Difficulty trusting

01/12/2025

If you’ve ever found yourself mid-lecture, wondering how you got there — you’re not alone.
In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to slip into long explanations, over-talking, and trying to get a child to understand right now.

But here’s the truth: children don’t learn from lectures.
They learn from reflection — and reflection only happens when both adult and child feel safe, calm, and connected.

Guiding a child through reflection can actually help you deregulate too.
It slows the moment down, reduces the pressure to “fix it immediately,” and shifts the focus from frustration to understanding.

You start to see the why behind their reactions — the feelings, needs, and overwhelm that drove the behaviour.
And when the adult feels calmer, the child’s nervous system follows.

If you’d like structured reflection prompts, co-regulation strategies, and guides for tricky moments, they’re all inside my Managing Big Feelings Toolkit. Find it via the link in comments below ⬇️ or via Linktree Shop in Bio.

Follow for more on reflection, consequences, and brain-based parenting this week.

01/12/2025

It came up again and again in the comments on our last post — and it’s something many single parents quietly carry.
Something I’ve personally struggled with too.

Today’s one-page visual in the Single Parent Series looks at why guilt hits harder for single parents — and how to soften it.
Because not all single parents are women.
Because mums and dads both deserve support, understanding, and a space free from judgement.

If this resonates, follow for more in the Single Parent Series — new one-page visuals coming throughout the next few weeks.

28/11/2025

When you ban screens as a consequence, it can feel like the quickest way to 'make the lesson stick'.

But for many young people (especially ND children), screens are a regulating tool — so removing them often ramps up overwhelm rather than reducing the behaviour.

Today’s post looks at why screen bans tend to backfire and what actually supports learning and regulation instead.

If you missed yesterday’s post on natural and logical consequences, it helps explain why consequences that don’t match the behaviour rarely lead to meaningful change.

Our Managing Big Feelings Toolkit is linked in the comments below ⬇️ or via Linktree Shop in Bio.

28/11/2025

Your child pushing back on YOU isn’t a failure.
It’s rehearsal.
You’re their safe place to learn how to say:
“I don’t agree.”
“I’m not comfortable.”
“I need more information.”
This is how confident, aware humans are built.