Dean Watkins Therapy

01/12/2025

My current article explores the relationship between perfectionistic checking and imposter syndrome.

Many high-achieving professionals assume their perfectionistic habits make them better at their job, but in therapy, I see a different story. Perfectionistic checking such as repeatedly re-reading emails, tweaking documents, revisiting work, isn’t usually about excellence, it’s actually about sa...

06/10/2025

Do you find it hard to ask for help, even when you need it?

That’s the Soloist Imposter - the part that believes you should handle everything on your own.

It can look like:

Reluctance to ask for support

Avoiding collaboration

Feeling guilty for needing guidance

Minimising achievements if help was involved

On the outside, it looks like independence.
But underneath, it’s fear - “If I can’t do it alone, I’m not good enough.”

👉 Asking for help isn’t weakness. It’s connection and connection is what helps you grow.

03/10/2025

The Expert Imposter: Why you feel you should always know more

For many professionals, imposter syndrome doesn’t show up as perfectionism.
It shows up as the belief that you should already know everything.

It can look like:
Reluctance to speak unless you’re 100% sure
Chasing qualifications and certificates
Fear of asking questions in case you’re “exposed”
Always feeling behind, no matter your experience

The problem? Chasing certainty doesn’t make self-doubt disappear.
It fuels it.

👉 Swipe through this carousel to see how the Expert Imposter holds people back = and how you can break free.

Question for you:
Have you ever stayed quiet in a meeting because you felt you didn’t know enough?

29/09/2025

The Perfectionist Imposter: Why nothing ever feels enough

On the outside, perfectionism looks like dedication.
But on the inside, it often hides self-doubt:

Endless re-checking and polishing

Procrastinating until things feel “just right”

Struggling to delegate because “no one else will get it right”

Feeling flat, even after praise

The truth?
Perfectionism doesn’t silence imposter syndrome.
It feeds it.

The shift isn’t about lowering your standards - it’s about loosening the grip, finding your compass, and remembering that progress matters more than perfection.

👉 If this resonates with you, you’re not alone. Many high-achievers I work with struggle with this pattern. Therapy can help you find a different way forward.

15/09/2025

When self-doubt shows up, the instinct is to fight it.
We push it away. We overthink. We wrestle with our own minds.

But here’s the paradox: the harder we struggle, the stronger it gets.

Think of:
👉 The finger trap: pull harder, it grips tighter.
👉 Quicksand: thrash and you sink faster.
👉 Heavy papers: resisting only exhausts you.

Dropping the struggle isn’t the same as giving up.
It’s about loosening the grip, steadying yourself, and creating space to move towards what matters.

⚓ Save this post as a reminder next time self-doubt takes hold.

12/09/2025

🌪️ The Imposter Cycle 🌪️

Ever notice how self-doubt seems to creep in no matter how much you achieve?

Here’s how the cycle often plays out:

➡️ You’re faced with an achievement-related task.
➡️ Anxiety and doubt kick in.
➡️ You either over-prepare (burning yourself out) or procrastinate until the last minute and then push frantically.
➡️ You succeed - and feel brief relief.
➡️ But instead of owning that success, you attribute it to luck or just working harder than everyone else.
➡️ And the cycle begins again.

🔄 It can feel endless, but it doesn’t have to be. Therapy helps you step outside the cycle - noticing the patterns, loosening their grip, and finding new ways to respond to self-doubt.

✨ You don’t need to get rid of imposter thoughts to break free - you just need to change your relationship with them.

👉 If this cycle feels familiar, know that you’re not alone. Many high-achievers experience it. And there are practical tools to help.

📍 I work with professionals online and in-person (Rainham, Kent) who want to break free from self-doubt, anxiety, and imposter syndrome.

📩 Send me a message if you’d like to chat about how therapy can support you.

08/08/2025

Are you stuck in the “prove yourself” cycle?
You work harder, stay later, and push yourself to deliver more, hoping that will finally silence the self-doubt.
But the confidence never really comes… and the cycle starts again.

In my latest LinkedIn article, I share why this happens, why it’s not about working less, and what to focus on instead if you want to feel secure in your abilities.

Read it here:

If you’ve ever thought, “I just need to prove myself, then I’ll finally feel confident”, you’re not alone. It’s a tempting idea: work harder, achieve more, tick all the boxes, and then the doubt will disappear.

05/08/2025

🧠 Struggling with anxiety, self-doubt or imposter syndrome?

You’re not alone—and the problem might not be what you think.

It’s often not uncertainty itself that causes distress—but how we respond to it. When not knowing feels risky, and it’s paired with uncomfortable emotions, our minds go into overdrive: overthinking, second-guessing, reassurance-seeking, or avoidance.

💬 Anxiety demands two things: certainty and comfort (Reid Wilson & Lynn Lyons).
But life doesn’t always offer that.

This blog explores how building ambiguity tolerance—the ability to sit with uncertainty and discomfort—can help you feel more confident, flexible, and less trapped by anxiety or imposter thoughts.

📖 Read the full post here: https://deanwatkinstherapy.co.uk/facing-uncertainty-how-learning-to-tolerate-ambiguity-can-ease-anxiety-self-doubt-and-imposter-syndrome/

01/08/2025

Self-doubt doesn’t always sound like “I’m not good enough.”
Sometimes it’s much quieter—whispering in the background through habits you might not even notice.

👉 Saying sorry all the time.
👉 Avoiding new challenges even though part of you wants to say yes.
👉 Asking for reassurance more than you’d like.
👉 Struggling to start things because it has to be just right.
👉 Dismissing your own achievements.

If any of that feels familiar, you’re not alone. These are some of the quieter ways self-doubt can show up—and many people experience them, even those who look confident on the outside.

But here’s the good news: once you start recognising these patterns for what they are, you can begin to relate to them differently. You don’t have to let them define what you’re capable of.

16/07/2025

Struggling with imposter syndrome?

You’re not alone — and you’re not failing. Many smart, capable people feel like they don’t deserve their success or worry they’ll be “found out.”

But trying to silence self-doubt by overworking or perfecting everything only keeps you stuck in the same cycle.

In my latest blog, I explore a different approach — one grounded in self-compassion and self-acceptance.

🧠 Learn how to:

Respond to self-doubt without fear or shame

Build confidence that isn’t based on performance

Stop chasing perfection and start showing up more authentically

📖 Read the full blog here: https://deanwatkinstherapy.co.uk/self-compassion-acceptance-key-ingredients-in-overcoming-imposter-syndrome/

11/07/2025

Ever feel like you’re just winging it? Like any minute now, someone’s going to realise you’re not as capable as they think?

You’re not broken — you’re human.

Imposter syndrome isn’t a personal flaw. It’s often the natural result of having a mind that evolved to detect danger, avoid rejection, and compare us to others… all in the name of survival.

But what helped us stay alive 200,000 years ago? Not so helpful when you’re trying to build confidence and show up in modern life.

In my latest blog, I explore how the evolution of the human mind sets us up to feel like a fraud — and more importantly, what you can do about it.

▶️ Read the full post here:
https://deanwatkinstherapy.co.uk/why-your-mind-makes-you-feel-like-a-fraud-and-what-evolution-has-to-do-with-it/

💬 Let me know what resonates — or share it with someone who might need to hear it.

02/07/2025

Ever find yourself constantly second-guessing?

You replay conversations, fixate on the smallest details, and spend hours perfecting work that was probably fine the first time.

Even when things go “well,” the relief never lasts — because the next task brings the doubts right back.

It’s exhausting.

You’re not missing opportunities because you’re not capable.
You’re missing them because you don’t *feel* capable.

Here’s the thing no one tells you:

You’ve been trying to overcome self-doubt by pushing harder, doing more, keeping everyone happy…

But that’s *exactly* what’s keeping you stuck.

Self-doubt doesn’t disappear when you overwork it into silence.

It begins to fade when you stop battling it and start responding to it differently — with understanding, compassion, and action that’s aligned with your values (not your fears).

This is the kind of work I do with clients every day.

We make sense of what's going on underneath the surface — and build self-trust in a way that’s steady, sustainable, and real.

🧠 If this resonates, know that you’re not alone — and you don’t have to keep trying to figure this out by yourself.

👉 Ready to stop letting self-doubt call the shots?
Click here to book your free consultation: https://linktr.ee/deanwatkinstherapy.co.uk