06/12/2025
I was going to write a post about Compassion Focused Therapy and how I use its principles in my clinic, however something happened on Friday morning with my son that reminded me so vividly of the principles at the heart of Compassion Focused Therapy - a therapeutic approach that helps people cultivate a kinder, steadier, more supportive inner voice.
It was one of those tough school-day starts; tiny tears and big feelings. Instead of speeding past them, I took a breath, softened my voice, and reached for a little compassion… and a slice of toast.
I cut my son’s toast into little Christmas shapes (as you can see from my photo in an incredibly artistic way 😉) - a Christmas tree and a slightly lopsided snowman. Somehow that small, playful gesture eased the heaviness. His shoulders relaxed. A smile peeked through. The world felt safe again and he felt able to think about going to school.
It got me thinking: we often do this instinctively for children — soften, soothe, offer comfort in simple, tangible ways. But adults need this too.
We can find this easy to do for others, but turning this inward on ourselves can be tricky. We are allowed to give ourselves that same compassion, perhaps in the tiniest of forms to make it easier. A cup of tea, calling a friend, for me getting under my heated blanket at my desk!
In sessions with clients, I will often explore the barriers to self-compassion and experiment with ways of trying these small acts. We then look at the impact this has on clients’ ability to cope with the rest of the day. It’s incredible how even tiny acts of compassion can shift the emotional tone of a whole day.
If you’re finding things heavy today, maybe try one small compassionate gesture, the emotional equivalent of a Christmas-shaped piece of toast.
www.cbtwithbeth.co.uk
