New Frame Therapy

New Frame Therapy Virtual 1:1 Psychotherapy, Coaching and Couples Therapy with a focus on emotional wellbeing and relationships.
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24/12/2025

Sometimes Christmas with the family reminds you exactly why you need therapy

My post about transactional relationships hit a nerve. (See the pinned post on my page for context)I think so many women...
16/12/2025

My post about transactional relationships hit a nerve. (See the pinned post on my page for context)

I think so many women are finally saying out loud what they’ve felt for years — that emotional safety isn’t optional.

In couples therapy, I saw patterns that went far beyond “communication issues.”
Some sessions involved toxic control, coercion, and even physical abuse.
And while trauma can explain behaviour, it never excuses it.

As therapists, we’re taught to hold empathy for everyone.
But empathy doesn’t mean abandoning our boundaries.
We are not obligated to keep working with clients who cause harm or refuse accountability.

And the same truth applies outside the therapy room.

You can understand where someone’s pain comes from without accepting the way they treat you.

Because healing requires both compassion and limits.

If you’re looking for therapy in St Albans or online, I have a few spaces open.
Link in bio 🤍

It’s true. As therapists we have to sit with the complexities of relationships and that might not always position the pe...
02/12/2025

It’s true.

As therapists we have to sit with the complexities of relationships and that might not always position the people closest to you in the best light.

It’s not always appropriate to say when someone sounds like a 🍆 (sometimes it is).

But, the reality is life and relationships are complex and as a therapist we also have to bracket our own assumptions and biases.

And people think all we do is listen.
Ha!
If only it were that easy.

📸 credit

The child who was already responsible and didn’t make mistakes becomes the woman with high-functioning anxiety and perfe...
26/11/2025

The child who was already responsible and didn’t make mistakes becomes the woman with high-functioning anxiety and perfectionism paralysis.

When you grow up being the “mature one,” the helper, or the child who kept things together, your nervous system learns that safety comes from being in control.

You stop allowing yourself to be messy, uncertain, or human because mistakes used to come with consequences.

So as an adult, you might appear confident and capable… while underneath, you’re constantly scanning for what could go wrong.

You overthink decisions.

You freeze when something isn’t perfect.

You can’t rest, because rest feels unsafe.

It’s hard to get started on things because you’re already overthinking all of the ways it could go wrong.

Do you relate?

📣Work with me 1:1 for relatable trauma informed therapy 💞 Link in bio

Lizandra x

🎙️Not ready for therapy? Listen to the podcast Healing Childhood Trauma available all places you listen to podcasts


An intro to me, Hey I’m Lizandra and I’m a psychotherapist. I’m pretty straight talking. A like a lil bit of woo but I c...
24/11/2025

An intro to me,
Hey I’m Lizandra and I’m a psychotherapist.
I’m pretty straight talking. A like a lil bit of woo but I couldn’t tell you when mercury is in retrograde.
I’m aware it means a lot to some, me not so much.
I’m a deep thinker, I run head first into the hard conversations and my BS detector is pretty sharp.
I think the environment I grew up with in London probably helped with that. Plus the sprinkling of trauma (because who hasn’t lived through tough experiences).

I’m a good mix of sensitive and will tell you about yourself - but I’ll probably cry and feel bad about it after.

That all reflects what I post here and the work that I do with my clients.

I don’t have the biggest account - I put the majority of my energy into my client work, so I do what I can here and on my podcast Healing Childhood Trauma (go check that out).

Hope you enjoy and learn from what I post here.

P.S. Posts here are not a replacement for therapy.

👇🏾If you’re feeling chatty, ask me something in the comments or tell me about you

Women aren’t born afraid of their own anger. We’re taught to be.Be quiet. Be pleasant. Don’t make a scene.And if you do ...
20/11/2025

Women aren’t born afraid of their own anger. We’re taught to be.

Be quiet. Be pleasant. Don’t make a scene.
And if you do speak up. There’s always a label waiting.

That conditioning doesn’t disappear in adulthood.

It turns into people-pleasing. Overthinking. Shrinking yourself.

Suppressing your anger is not harmless.

It sits in your body. It chips away at your sense of self. It keeps your nervous system on high alert until burnout feels like your normal.

But it’s why you never feel rested, no matter how much sleep you get.
Your brain always in thinking mode - it never seems to switch off.

It’s why you’re always feeling irritated. Holding onto resentment.

If you’ve spent years being the “good girl” at the expense of your own wellbeing. You are not overreacting. You’re recognising the cost.

If you’re tired of carrying this and you want to stop second-guessing yourself. Get clearer in your decisions and feel like yourself again. This is the work we do in therapy.

Link in bio or send me a DM if you’re thinking of starting therapy.

Lizandra x

18/11/2025

I have a lot respect for men. The ones who are imperfect, kind, loving sons, committed fathers, getting it wrong at times, but trying to figure it out.

But the ones who put hands on women. The ones who dehumanise women.
The ones who invalidate, dismiss and manipulate.

It’s a no from me. Therapist or not - I don’t f*x with that.

That’s a big reason why I stopped working with couples. I can’t in good conscience support a relationship that does more harm than good.

This therapist was tired of the misogyny and patriarchy.

As therapists we can’t shy away from saying the hard things and having the hard conversations. We are not only here to v...
14/11/2025

As therapists we can’t shy away from saying the hard things and having the hard conversations.
We are not only here to validate because sometimes some behaviours are problematic. Therapy is not all light and only saying what you want to hear.
It’s also what you need to hear. Even when it’s hard and uncomfortable.
That’s an important part of healing, growth and changing unhealthy patterns ❤️‍🩹

I have a few spaces free right now if you’re feeling called to start therapy.

Send me a DM and let’s see if we’re a good fit to work together.

Lizandra x

11/11/2025

Childhood trauma patterns get replayed in relationships but not everyone is showing up and doing the work to resolve these issues.
That’s exactly what I see my therapy practice every single week

What do you think? Do you think more men need to go to therapy?

07/11/2025

This is why I stopped working with couples as a Therapist.
Relationships were getting embarrassing as a whole.
I’m glad we’re finally talking about it.

Address

Victoria Street
Saint Albans
AL1

Opening Hours

Monday 10am - 6pm
Tuesday 10am - 6pm
Wednesday 10am - 6pm
Friday 9:30am - 3pm

Telephone

+447934764469

Website

https://linktr.ee/Newframetherapy

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