19/01/2026
High functioning women rarely say I need help. They’re so used to being the one who holds it together that loneliness gets disguised as independence.
At some point, self-reliance stops being empowering and starts being exhausting.
You’re capable, organised, emotionally intelligent, and everyone knows you as the strong one.
But strength can quietly become a way of staying in control instead of staying connected.
When your nervous system learned early that support wasn’t predictable, you adapt. You don’t relax into people. You stay switched on around them.
You help, fix, listen, and manage, even when what you actually want is to exhale and let someone else take the lead for once.
That’s why a lot of high-achieving women don’t struggle with competence, they struggle with receiving.
Letting someone step in can feel awkward, unsafe, or even like you’re asking for too much, so you keep doing it yourself and call it independence.
But a village isn’t built on how useful you are.
It’s built on how safe you feel being seen when you’re not okay.
If this resonates, pause for a moment and notice where you stay strong when you’d rather be supported. That awareness is often the first small shift toward deeper connection.
❤️ Ready to start therapy?
I have two more spaces to join me this month. Send me a DM for details.
Lizandra x
