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Monday 9am - 6pm Tuesday 5pm - 9pm Wednesday 9am - 9pm Thursday 5pm - 9pm Friday 10am - 6pm

CYF Therapy

I'm a BABCP accredited CBT therapist based in Skegness, from Bolton. "I see myself as a no-frills therapist.

After studying Criminological and Forensic Psychology, I earned a Post Graduate Diploma in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy at the University of Bolton. I have experience working with individuals with forensic backgrounds, Autism and Long-Term Health Conditions. I have worked for both the NHS and privately in care homes before coming to Private Practice. I have experience of working with a diverse range of individuals. If you are unable to figure out your problem for yourself, I am willing to tell you what I see. However, I will also check out whether this is appropriate for you. As a result, I may have to tell you what you need to hear, instead of what you want to hear. It is not uncommon for me to use examples from my own life during sessions. However, I do so only when I think it is relevant and will be beneficial to your understanding. The question is not "and what does that say about you" but "how can we help you learn why you engage in certain behaviours and patterns and how can we teach you skills that will allow us to change the ones you want to change?" I am curious. "

Further Specialised Training:

CBT for long term health conditions: Nottingham University

Autism Training: National Autistic Society and British Psychological Society

Strength based CBT: Christine Padesky

Cognitive Analytic Therapy in a forensic setting: BPS

Flash Technique

EMDR

27/08/2025

We've been a little busy creating an app!

I have apps to help me do everything, so I decided to try and create my own.
It has a mum/ ADHD friendly cleaning schedule, a to do list, a brain dump area that you can put what you want to do and it will help prioritise things for you and of course a little "Tamagotchi" that grows and does quests and you can buy it stuff as you complete the tasks.

I've currently made it for just me and Lilith, but I sent it to a few friends and they like it, so I'm going to go back and try to make it more general.

If once it is done anyone would like to test it out / give me some feedback I'd appreciate it. If you drop your email on my website I can send the link over.

https://changeyourfuturetherapy.co.uk/resources

17/08/2025

𝓜𝔂𝓽𝓱-𝓑𝓾𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓐𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓪𝓹𝔂

Myth: "Counselling is just paying someone to be your friend."
Truth: Trained therapists provide specialised skills, clinical insight, and therapeutic interventions that friends, however well-meaning, cannot offer. It's professional support with specific training and boundaries.

Myth: "CBT is just positive thinking."
Truth: CBT is a structured, evidence-based approach that teaches clients to examine and challenge thought patterns - not just "think positive". It's grounded in decades of research and involves specific techniques and tools.

Myth: "EMDR is just weird eye movements."
Truth: EMDR is a comprehensive, 8-phase therapy protocol. The bilateral stimulation is one component of the approach that helps your brain's natural processing abilities. The neuroscience behind it is solid.

Myth: "EMDR is only for trauma."
Truth: While excellent for trauma, I use EMDR for anxiety, OCD, phobias, performance anxiety and low self-esteem. It's much broader than just trauma work.

Myth: "One type of therapy works for everyone."
Truth: In my experience, different approaches work for different people and different issues. Part of my job is helping you find the right fit - whether that's CBT, EMDR, or referring you to a counsellor.

Your healing journey deserves evidence-based, professional support. Don't let myths prevent you from getting the help you deserve.

14/08/2025

𝓐𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓔𝓜𝓓𝓡 (𝓔𝔂𝓮 𝓜𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓓𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓼𝓲𝓽𝓲𝓼𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓡𝓮𝓹𝓻𝓸𝓬𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓲𝓷𝓰)

The Simple Breakdown: EMDR uses bilateral stimulation (like eye movements) to help your brain process difficult memories and experiences. It's not just for trauma - I use it for anxiety, depression, phobias, grief, and many other issues. It helps your brain's natural healing process. Think of it as having a specialised vehicle that helps you navigate through stuck places.

EMDR In a nutshell: "Let's help your brain process this." The bilateral stimulation might seem unusual, but the neuroscience is solid. It can actually be less intense than CBT when processing difficult experiences. When you've hit some roadblocks (trauma, anxiety, phobias, grief), it helps you move through them using your brain's natural processing abilities.

What to Expect in EMDR Sessions:
• We focus on specific memories, experiences, or current difficulties
• You engage in bilateral stimulation (eye movements, tones, or taps)
• Multiple sessions needed for complete processing
• Can feel less intense than CBT when working with difficult material

EMDR works best when clients have:
• Ridged core beliefs
• Trauma history (but it's not limited to trauma!)
• Phobias or performance anxiety
• Sleep problems, nightmares, or low self-esteem
• Stuck patterns that feel hard to shift
• When previous talk therapy hasn't addressed underlying issues effectively

EMDR is a comprehensive 8-phase therapy protocol that helps your brain properly process and integrate difficult experiences. It's much broader than just trauma work

12/08/2025

𝓐𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓒𝓑𝓣 (𝓒𝓸𝓰𝓷𝓲𝓽𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝓑𝓮𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓪𝓵 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓪𝓹𝔂)

The Simple Breakdown: CBT is like having a personal trainer for your mind, with evidence-based techniques. I give you specific tools and action plans to challenge negative thoughts and behaviours. It's like providing you with a GPS and roadmap - I give you specific routes to get from point A to point B, with clear instructions and checkpoints. That you can take away and use on your own.

CBT In a nutshell: "Let's fix this problem together." Highly structured approach. I'll give you worksheets, help you challenge thoughts, and we'll create behavioural experiments between sessions. Some clients love the structure; others find it too rigid - but it gets results fast for anxiety, depression, and specific issues.

What to Expect in CBT Sessions:
• I provide information, worksheets and structured action plans
• We track your thoughts and behaviours
• You practice new skills between our sessions
• Very goal-orientated with clear treatment plans
• Usually 12-20 sessions with measurable outcomes

I suggest CBT when clients present with:
• Anxiety disorders and panic attacks
• Depression and mood difficulties
• Specific phobias and fears
• Obsessive-compulsive symptoms
• Sleep disorders and behavioural issues
• A Desire for practical tools and coping strategies
• A preference for structured, goal-orientated treatment

CBT is grounded in decades of research and provides you with practical tools you can use long after therapy ends.

10/08/2025

𝓐𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓒𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰:

𝗟𝗲𝘁 𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 - 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝘆 𝗜 𝗺𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗳𝗲𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝘁:

What Counselling looks like: Counselling is like having a trained professional who listens deeply and asks the right questions to help you discover your own insights and answers. Think of it as being your walking companion who listens to your stories and helps you see the path more clearly. You set the pace, choose the direction, and the counsellor is there to support and guide you along the way.

In a nutshell, counselling is "Tell me what's going on." You do most of the talking; the counsellor does most of the listening and reflecting. Great when you need to process emotions, work through life changes, or untangle complex thoughts. No homework, no specific techniques - just skilled therapeutic presence and insight.

In Counselling sessions:
• You talk; the counsellor listens with trained therapeutic skills
• They ask thoughtful, purposeful questions
• You explore patterns and insights together
• No homework or specific exercises
• Sessions feel like deep, meaningful conversations with professional guidance

When I refer for Counselling: While I specialise in CBT and EMDR, if I feel general counselling would better serve your needs, I can refer/signpost you to excellent counsellors who can provide that support. This might be when you need space to process emotions or major life changes, support through grief or relationship issues, or a less structured, more exploratory therapeutic relationship.

All valid therapeutic journeys lead to healing.

08/08/2025

𝓝𝓸𝓽 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓪𝓹𝔂 𝓲𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓪𝓶𝓮

People expect therapy to look like TV – sitting on a sofa with a therapist saying "how does that make you feel?" repeatedly. There are many different types of therapy and therapists. My main modality is CBT, but I also use ACT, DBT, parts work, and I'm trained in EMDR. I've tried to do a bit of a breakdown:

𝗖𝗕𝗧: We both speak; I provide information on how your brain and body work with worksheets and action plans. We track your thoughts and behaviours, and then you learn new skills and practice between sessions. It's goal-orientated with clear treatment plans.

Best for people who have/want:
• Specific symptoms (anxiety, depression, phobias)
• Practical tools and coping strategies
• Structured, goal-orientated treatment
• Quick symptom reduction
• OCD or behavioural issues

𝗘𝗠𝗗𝗥: It's not just lights. We take time to understand the root cause (negative cognition) and how you'd rather think (positive cognition) and then prepare you to accept the positive cognition. Then come the lights. EMDR doesn't make it like it never happened but takes most of the pain away.

I use EMDR for:
• Anxiety, panic attacks, OCD
• Trauma history (not limited to trauma!)
• Phobias, performance anxiety
• Sleep problems, nightmares, low self-esteem
• Stuck patterns that feel hard to shift

I refer for 𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 when clients need:
• General emotional support and exploration
• Relationship or identity issues needing open-ended discussion
• Major life transitions (divorce, job loss, relocation)
• Less structured, more client-led approach

The best part of specialising in CBT and EMDR is adapting my approach to what serves you best. Sometimes we use both modalities; sometimes I'll refer you to a counsellor if that's what would help most.

06/08/2025

ＨｉｎｄｓｉｇｈｔＢｉａｓ

𝙎𝙩𝙤𝙥 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙪𝙥 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙛𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬.

Story time: When I was looking to start my degree in Criminological and Forensic psychology, Steph asked me, “How do you want to work in a prison if you’ve never been to one?” Fair enough question. She asked me if I wanted to come with her to visit someone in Forrest Bank. I said, Yeah, why not? It seemed like a good idea.

Fast forward maybe 4 years later, I get a job as a 999 call handler in Lancashire police but then get a letter to say I hadn’t passed the vetting; they couldn’t tell me why as it was nothing to do with me personally, but I could go for an interview. In the interview she starts asking me about prisons; by then I’d visited Broadmoor and gone to a few for my training while working in Strangeways. It turns out that because I had visited that person, I was classed as a known associate, and that was me done for at least 10 years where it came to the police. She actually said, “didn’t you think it would ruin your career?” clearly not love, or I wouldn’t have gone, would I?

And that’s the point: when I made that decision, I did not know that I would be tied to that person for the next 10 years; I didn't know that I was ever going to apply to the police; I didn’t know all the processes with prisons and everything I’d learnt in my degree, but did that stop me from looking at that decision and calling myself every name under the sun for making it, looking at what I could have done better, what I should have done, and thinking about how I should have known?

Nope, and that’s hindsight bias. Looking at the information you have then and judging your past self for decisions when you had no clue what direction your life was going to go in.

Shall I tell you what else I didn’t know: that answering a phone call while setting up an Aperol Spritz stand would make me into a CBT therapist, that going into a gym leaving leaflets about IAPT would lead to me having my own business, and that leaving a charger at work would bring me Lilith? but we don’t analyse those decisions to death, do we?

01/08/2025

I'm not sure who is going to see this, as I've totally abandoned social media since September.
But I got an email asking if I was still in business, as I hadn't posted, so I thought I'd best get back to it. 🫣
It's been a hectic few months, finishing contracts with the NHS and starting new contracts.

While talking about social media, one of my clients (an actual superstar, but to be fair, most of my clients are) told me I need to introduce myself better, so I'm going to try...

Here is a picture of me and Lilith after a day at work.
Lilith is a British bulldog. She's in training to be a therapy dog and would pass everything except she thinks everyone is her bestie, so she gets a little bit excited when she meets someone. She comes into session if and when she is wanted.

As for me, I have a degree in Criminological and Forensic psychology and a postgraduate diploma in Cognitive behavioural therapy, and I'm an accredited therapist through the BABCP. I'm also trained in EMDR (adult and child), ACT, DBT, long-term health conditions and couples therapy.

I have experience working with all types of individuals (I use the term individuals because that is what we are, and I hope that if you aren't already proud of your individuality, you will be by the end of therapy), those with trauma, OCD, anxiety, insomnia, looked-after children, those with a forensic background, and those who have Autism, ADHD, and/or long-term health conditions.
Individuals with religion and those without or who have moved away from it, and individuals from the LGBTQIA+ community. I work with individuals 14 and older

Having been diagnosed late with ADHD myself, I have a special interest in working with individuals with ND. Helping some to overcome issues with a late diagnosis, but also helping them to understand the diagnosis, what works for them and what doesn't, along with techniques to help with emotional regulation, rejection sensitivity and perfectionism traits.

I've also been approved by most private health insurers, so if you have a policy with Bupa, Axa, Aviva, WPA, etc., your sessions may be covered under your policy.

If you are still here, thanks for reading.

Nicola

Address

152 Drummond Road
Skegness
PE253EX

Opening Hours

Monday	9am - 6pm
Tuesday	5pm - 9pm
Wednesday	9am - 9pm
Thursday	5pm - 9pm
Friday	10am - 6pm

Telephone

+441754482442

Website

http://www.changeyourfuturetherapy.co.uk/

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