10/11/2025
🌸 Why Some People Externalise, And Others Internalise
When something goes wrong, where does your mind go first?
If you tend to internalise, you might think, “It must be me.”
If you tend to externalise, you might think, “It must be them.”
Both patterns begin as protection.
Internalisers blame themselves to stay connected: “If it’s my fault, I can fix it.”
Externalisers project blame to stay safe: “If it’s your fault, I don’t have to feel shame.”
Neither is right or wrong. Healing is about balance, being able to take responsibility without self-blame, and to hold others accountable without hostility.
🌿 Growth begins where reflection replaces reactivity.