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Tuesday 9am - 5pm Saturday 9:30am - 12:30pm

Tracy Rae Counselling

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Tracy Rae Counselling

Counselling service

12/09/2024

New logo day! A re-brand, that's very me. I love sage green. All thanks to Jonathan Finch - freelance graphic designer. You won't be disappointed if you use his services, he goes above and beyond.

31/07/2024

🌿 Tracy Rae Counselling 🌿

Counselling that helps clients delve into their challenges in a safe, supportive environment.

Fostering healing and resilience and working with them to help navigate their experiences, ensuring comfort and empowerment throughout their journey. ❤️

https://thecornwallbusinessdirectory.co.uk/listing/tracy-rae-counselling/

25/03/2024

Technology – we can’t do without it, pretty much everything we do at some point is centred around using our smart mobile phones/devices/laptops. Websites and apps are used for communicating, shopping, medical advice, alarm clocks, tracking exercise and even dating. Technology is woven into our daily lives, and whilst there are benefits, there are also drawbacks.

According to research a third of adults have fallen out with someone after misreading text messages. One in five wrongly assumed someone was in a mood with them, because they got the tone of a message completely wrong. This can sometimes cause irreversible damage to relationships.

Below are 5 tips to reduce the likelihood of jumping to conclusions and getting it wrong.

1. Assume good intentions – Texts are short, leaving little information to work with. The lack of any facial expressions, or tone of voice can lead us to assume a person is angry. Unless they say they are angry, assume that the text is sent with good intentions.

2. Stick to lighter topics – Don’t try to conduct serious conversations via text. Texts are more useful for confirming plans, dates and times to meet. Any more serious conversations are better conducted face-to-face.

3. Don’t text when in a rush – We all at some point fire off a quick text reply. Texting when in a rush can result in using less punctuation, which means texts may be read different to how they were intended. If you have to send a quick text, re-read your text before pressing send.

4. Double check the recipient – How many times do we text someone other than the person the text is meant for. Ensure before pressing send, it’s going to the right person.

5. Ask for clarification – As above, don’t assume. Check understanding, ask for clarification on any part of the text you don’t understand.

If you need support with resolving relationship difficulties, you can contact me on 07731 580333

www.tracyraecounselling.co.uk

03/10/2023

I received this lovely plant off a client today. We had previously discussed the fact I struggle to keep my plants alive, I kill them with kindness by over watering. I’ve been given some watering tips…..let’s see how this goes. 😁

25/08/2023

The wounded child can affect our present adult self.

As we grow up we need to feel safe - safe from harm and fear. If your needs weren’t met as a child, you may grow up to be a hypervigilant adult.

There are 3 types of trauma children may experience by their care givers, these are:
Physical neglect
Emotional neglect
Psychological neglect

Some of the signs you are a wounded child are:
A feeling that there’s something wrong
Being a people pleaser
Constantly striving to be an achiever
Feeling ashamed at expressing emotions
Having a deep distrust of people
Avoiding conflict, no matter what the cost

If you recognise yourself in any of the above, you should know that there is hope. Inner child work can ease the pain and heal the wounds left behind by our caregivers.

Ways in which you can start to heal your wounded child are:

Acknowledge your inner child - by acknowledging them and telling them you will look out for them, your inner child will feel safer.

Practice self-compassion - using words of understanding rather than being critical of yourself can help reduce anxiety, stress and depression.

Write a letter to your inner child - offering words of support with love, kindness and compassion, can help provide wisdom of your adult self.

If you need support with working through inner childhood trauma, you can contact me using any of the details on the comments.

20/08/2023

Trauma - those who have experienced trauma or witnessed a traumatic event, can be left with triggers, these can be felt over and over again if we don’t listen to the warning signs.

Triggers are not a sign to avoid the ‘thing’ that’s triggered us for the rest of our lives. Triggers are a signal alerting us to the need for organising the trauma in our brain. Triggers are opportunities rather than reasons to avoid them.

We are not always conscious of our triggers, these can occur subconsciously. Triggers can be something we see, taste, smell or hear.

It’s important that when we are suffering with Trauma, we use the body as a gauge, it’s continually giving our brain information. For example - If you suddenly feel upset when in the company of a specific person, that’s a signal you should listen to as it’s possible there’s a trigger there.
Another example could be feeling triggered after a car accident, and seeing a similar car to the one you were driving at the time of the traumatic event.

There is a misconception that feeling numb about a traumatic event means that it has been dealt with, in contrast to another person who observed the same trauma but is experiencing a ‘hysterical response’. It’s common for someone who has experienced trauma to be experiencing intrusive thoughts while going about their day, maybe crying a lot, or are having angry outbursts.

There can be a lot of shame wrapped up in trauma. “I don’t have the right to feel upset about something I have only witnessed, after all I am not related to the person who was involved in the event”.

Shame can get in the way of making sense of what you witnessed, and fitting it into your story. Normalising the response by talking about it is a good way of assigning meaning to the event. If shame continues to get in the way, it can prevent healing. Talking about the feelings and emotions associated with what you have experienced will help to connect the narrative to the feelings and emotions.

If you are experiencing a trauma response, you are not broken, trauma responses are an evolutionary change which are there to keep us alive.

If you are suffering with trauma symptoms and would like to talk in a safe and held space, then get in touch, see details in the comments.

11/08/2023

What is Shame, we all feel it, but what is it?
Shame is an emotion we feel when we think there’s something fundamentally wrong with the self. It’s a self-conscious emotion. Shame makes us feel inadequate as a person. Shame is the belief that we have done something wrong and that makes us a bad person. Someone experiencing shame may not be able to identify their positive qualities or see themselves in a good light.
Shame is not necessarily about a specific behaviour or event. Shame is a painful feeling that’s a mix of regret and self-hate. Some people confuse Shame and Guilt.

Guilt is a feeling you get when you have done something wrong, or perceive that you have done something wrong.

When you feel guilty about the thing you did wrong, you try to make up for it, so you can put it behind you. But feeling shame, or being convinced that you are the thing that's wrong, is harder to undo and try to feel positive about yourself again. That's the difference between shame and guilt.

Because of Shames intensity and pain, people feel a strong motivation to get rid of the feeling.

To move through Shame you might try one or more of the below:

1. Become aware of how you talk to yourself. Try to observe your own thoughts but not react to them.
2. Have compassion for yourself. Everyone has flaws and makes mistakes.
3. Practice mindfulness.
4. Recognise when you're feeling shame.
5. Seek support with a counsellor.

The Shame spiral image outlines many people’s experiences of shame.

If you want to talk about Shame, then get in touch, contact details are in the comments.

03/08/2023

Do friends cancel plans last minute?

Do you get upset when you’re always the one to compromise?

Do you fail to speak up for yourself when people treat you badly?

Do you go out of your way to avoid conflict?

Do you feel like you are not seen and heard?

If this sounds like you, and you’re struggling with issues such as these, it’s likely due to the lack of boundary setting.

Learning to create and maintain boundaries will enhance your life in various ways, whilst improving your relationships with others.

The first step is to understand and learn how to set boundaries. By understanding yourself, you will learn where to set your boundaries and be able to speak up for yourself, without feeling guilty.

You can practice boundary setting skills with your friends and family, you might agree to hold each other accountable.

While being assertive and protecting your boundaries might offend some people, chances are that you’ll earn more respect among your family and friends when you function within your established boundaries.

If you want to explore working on boundary setting in a safe and held space, get in touch - contact details in comments.

28/07/2023

Shame
Shame can become a problem when we start to internalise it, often resulting in us being critical of ourselves. Our inner critic may tell us that we are a bad person, worthless or have no value.
Shame is closely associated with embarrassment, humiliation and guilt.

Symptoms of Shame
👉 worrying about what others think of you, or feeling sensitive
👉 feeling rejected or inadequate
👉 losing your identity - feeling like you can’t be yourself
👉 worrying about failure, or being a perfectionist
👉 having an overriding sense of withdrawing, shutting people out.

Coping with Shame
👉 Step 1 - Understanding your Shame
It’s important to understand what Shame is about as gaining an awareness will aid healing.

👉 Step 2 - Embracing your Shame
When you have identified your Shame and acknowledged it, it’s important to identify the feelings associated with Shame.

👉 Step 3 - Finding acceptance
Exploring your beliefs and attitudes about yourself will support the acceptance of the self.

The process of healing Shame is a personal one and can take some time to move through your ‘stuckness’ with Shame.

Doing this work with a counsellor has huge benefits to understanding your emotions and triggers.

If you would like to understand your Shame and want to start your healing journey, you can contact me using any of the details below.

07731 580333

Address

Frogpool
Truro
TR48RY

Opening Hours

Tuesday	9am - 5pm
Saturday	9:30am - 12:30pm

Telephone

+447731580333

Website

http://Www.tracyrae.Co.uk/

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