Evolve Men’s work

28/11/2025

25/11/2025

Yes men, we are meeting again on the 5th of December, it’s the last circle of 2025. I can’t wait to sit with the amazing men again.

If you like to join me drop me a dm or check the link in bio .

13/11/2025

5 Ways to Free Yourself from Trauma
(So You Can Show Up Better in Your Relationships)

1. Face What You’ve Been Avoiding
Healing starts when you stop running. Whether it’s anger, shame or grief, turn toward it. Feel it. Name it. You can’t heal what you refuse to feel.

2. Stop Making Your Partner Your Healer
It’s not her job to fix your past.
Take responsibility for your wounds so she can love you for who you are. Don’t add more pressure to her or the relationship.

3. Find Safe Spaces to Be vulnerable,
Men’s circles, therapy, breathwork, time in nature, go to the gym, find places where you can drop the mask and open up. Healing happens with vulnerability not in isolation.

4. Learn to Regulate Your Nervous System
When you’re triggered, breathe Slow down. Trauma lives in the body. calm the body and your past will stop ruling you.
Get support healing your nervous system.

5 Forgive Yourself for How You learnt to Survive
Whatever you did to cope, shutting down, chasing validation, numbing out was just survival. Forgive that version of you. He did what he had to do to stay safe, Now it’s time to live, not just survive. Find peace with yourself and any mistakes you may of made.

If you heal yourself you won’t be looking for a partner to heal your past, you deserve to be healed and she deserves a man who is in control of his emotions and life.

11/11/2025

Who Are You When You Remove the Masks?
Who is are you as a man when no one is else is watching you?

Every day, we wear masks.
The smiles at work, polite laughs, the “I’m fine” reply’s.
They protect us from judgment, rejection or vulnerability.
But underneath, there’s the real you waiting to be seen.

Taking the mask off can feel uncomfortable and scary, but it’s the only way to truly connect with yourself and others. When it comes off, you meet your fears, desires, flaws and your true power.

In Relationships

We often wear masks in relationships trying to be the strong partner, the fun one, the peacekeeper. This can show up in the form of the NICE GUY, Real connection only happens when those masks fall away.

Removing your mask allows you to:

Be your authentic self, not who you think your partner wants you to be.
Express your true feelings, fears, and desires so you can be more authentic in the relationship.
Invite intimacy based on truth, not performance. How can you love or be loved fully if you are living a lie??

Masks may feel safe, but real love thrives when both people show up fully, without disguise.

09/11/2025

5 Reasons You’ve Stopped Having Sex…

There are lots of reasons why relationships break down, why couples stop being intimate with each other. Here are 5 possible reasons why …

1. There’s no emotional safety.
She doesn’t feel seen or understood by you.
Her body can’t open to you if she doesn’t feel safe!!
Are you reactive ? Do you listen to her? Are you safe to be around?

2. You’ve become passive, you are not leading your own life, you’ve stopped doing things that you enjoy, you are just going with the flow with no direction.

3. You’ve stopped leading the relationship. She feels like she’s carrying the emotional weight of the household. So now She’s in her masculine because someone has to step up and lead the family.
If you’re not leading she will.

4. P**n has replaced your presence.
You’re satisfying your desires without intimacy and she feels that disconnection from you. The more p**n you watch the worse this will get.

5. You’re not bringing your truth.
When you suppress your honesty, she can’t trust your heart or your masculine edge. Women are so intuitive she’s know’s when you are full of s**t bro.

Reignite the spark by rebuilding trust, step up and lead the relationship STOP chasing s*x and start restoring connection.

Start dating her again, love her, see her, show her you are the man in the relationship, she doesn’t want to have s*x with a boy she wants a man.

Check out my free how to stop p**n guide in bio.

❤️

05/11/2025

If you feel like the world is on your shoulders and you have to carry it all alone that’s a valid feeling,

but what if that was just your nervous system trying to keep you safe, ?

Because that’s what you did as a child when your needs were not met.

Did your care givers validate your emotions?
Did they tell you to
Stop crying?
Stop being stupid ?
Man up ?
Did they leave you to look after yourself because they were unable to care for you properly?

Maybe this lone wolf persona you’ve created is your way of surviving, keeping you safe, is it safe to ask for help? Do you trust others or yourself?

Men you can heal this, but you need help we cannot do this alone, we need community, support and most of all we need brotherhood.

Reach out men !!

I reached out to the .unmaskedman and it changed my life, now I run my own men’s circle and help men in the ways I can. I also am now supporting the unmasked man team .

You can change your life trust me !!

Big love James

28/10/2025

MENS CIRCLE 7th NOVEMBER

Next in person mens circle in wells will be on the 7th of November, in studio eight, Wells.

As the nights draw in and we move into winter, it’s easy for our mental health to start to slide, the lack of sunlight and daylight hours can make things like going out in nature, fitness and socialising more difficult,
I know for me in the past my mental health has slipped over the winters.
So this might be a great opportunity for you to join a group of men in your local area that have or are experiencing similar struggles to you,

We have a great group of men that have all made great progress in their mental health, and have made huge improvements in their lives over the last year, we are very welcoming and inclusive of all men, and every single one of us, myself included has had fear and nerves about walking into the room for the first time.

Check out my other posts for testimonials from some of the men.

Booking link in bio

See you there men.

26/10/2025

If your partner’s always on your case picking up after you, reminding you to do things, cleaning the house while you relax it might be time for a step up.

When a man stops leading himself at home, the polarity in the relationship shifts, 
She steps into her masculine, doing, managing, organising. because someone has to right ? 
And you slip into the role of the boy, not the man.
This dynamic kills attraction. She doesn’t want to mother you, she wants to feel your presence, but if she’s always tidying, planning and carrying the load, she can’t relax into her feminine, because she doesn’t feel supported.
Small actions change everything, Wash your dishes, do the laundry, Take out the bins. without being asked.
Notice what needs doing and do it.
Not because you’re being told to, but because you’re leading and showering her love and support.
Treat her like did when you started dating her.
When you take ownership of your space, she feels safer to soften.
And that shift from “mother and boy” to “woman and man” is where intimacy and respect return.

This isn’t going to solve all your problems in a relationship but trust me this is a great start.
It’s time to be a man and show her you give a s**t about her and the relationship.

25/10/2025

What a proud moment to get a message saying the .unmaskedman new website is live and I’m on the team.

Sometimes in life I have to take a deep breath and pause and look back at all the work that I’ve done to get to this point in my life.
I know with determination and dedication you can change the life you are living and step into the man you really want to be.

If you have a dream or are working a job you hate, your relationship feels unstable, you really can do something about it, but you need to own your s**t men, drop your ego and do the work.

For me it started getting real when I did inner work around other men.

Maybe it’s time to join that men’s circle or go on that retreat you’ve been avoiding.

I went to an .unmaskedman retreat a few years ago and it changed my life, now I get to support the team and the men that come along.

24/10/2025

Where in your life are you still struggling?

What keeps coming up again and again that no longer serves you?

💢Maybe it’s anger.
💢Maybe you are being triggered by the same thing over and over.
💢Maybe it’s the same argument.
💢Maybe it’s that quiet voice that says “you should be further along by now.”

Whatever it is, it’s not here to punish you.
It’s here to show you where you need to do the work.

Here are 10 things that might be at the root of it

1. You’re still carrying unprocessed emotion, anger, grief, shame that wants to move.

2.You keep trying to do it all alone instead of reaching out for support.

3.You’ve outgrown your old environment, but you’re still trying to fit in there.

4. You’ve learned to numb instead of feel, doom scrolling, drinking, overworking etc.

5. You’re living in your head, not your body, disconnected from what you truly need.

6. You’re holding onto someone else’s expectations instead of your own truth.

7. You haven’t allowed yourself to rest and integrate. constantly doing, no being.

8. You fear what will happen if you finally let go of control.

9. You’ve forgotten the power of movement, breath, silence, connection.

10. You’re being called to evolve… but you’re still clinging to the old version of you.

Reflection:
What’s one pattern you’re ready to release and what would life feel like without it?

If you’d like to work one on one with me drop me a DM. Based on my own journey I can guide you through some steps to start making some serious changes in your life.