13/11/2025
Being Harsh on Yourself? Read This.
Iâve just come off a call with a client and honestly⌠it really hit home for me too.
We were setting him up for a strong run into Christmas, going through goals, routines, simple wins. But the biggest thing holding him back wasnât motivation or knowledge or time.
It was how unbelievably harsh he is on himself.
And the truth isâŚ
Arenât we all guilty of that from time to time?
Hypercritical. Comparing ourselves. Getting stuck in our own heads. Forgetting how far weâve actually come. Weâre so busy looking ahead at everything we think we âshouldâ be doing that we donât stop to look back at everything we have already overcome.
So I asked him something I think more of us need to ask ourselves:
âIf you looked at yourself from five years ago and saw where you are today⌠would you be proud?â
Because the answer is rarely a simple yes or no.
Sometimes itâs:
âYes â Iâm a better dad. Iâm a better partner. Iâm more grounded than I used to be and way fitter and stronger.â
Other times itâs:
âIâve still got more to give and I know it.â
Both are valid.
Both matter.
And both help you move forward without beating yourself down.
We worked through some simple steps to soften that harsh inner voice because honestly, the psychological side of transformation is just as important as lifting weights or hitting your steps. The mindset work is what keeps you going when life knocks you sideways.
I shared a Chinese proverb with him that I absolutely love:
âFall down seven times, stand up eight.â
Because resilience isnât about never falling.
Itâs about rising again and again⌠often quieter, wiser and stronger than before.
And sometimes the most powerful thing you can do for yourself isnât pushing harder â itâs speaking to yourself with the same compassion, respect and patience youâd offer someone you deeply care about.
Youâre doing better than you think.
And when you look back one day, youâll see just how far youâve already come.