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A Parker Therapy

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A Parker Therapy

Individual, Couple and Family Counselling Ashley is a relationship therapist working with both individuals and couples.

All sessions are provided via telephone or online.

01/03/2026

Hello March ❤️

Spring is tiptoeing closer to us…and it’s my Birthday month.

It’s also a time when I notice couples seeking out therapy for that spring clean feel.

There’s not necessarily a crisis or a specific something to work through, but the relationship feels like it needs some extra attention.

So…if you’re feeling that springlike energy, don’t let your house be the only thing that gets a spring clean 😉

24/02/2026

Don’t ask if you don’t want to know the answer!

So many times I hear “I just want them to tell me what they want” and quite often I witness the crushing moments when the courage is cultivated to say it…and it’s met with defence or dismissal.

Here’s the thing…we so often believe we’re communicating our needs and wants, but they’re just not being heard.

Listening to truly hear is powerful.
Sitting with the discomfort of not knowing how to respond is kinder than shutting the conversation down or jumping to defence because you’re unsure what to say next.

Therapy is sometimes the only space where needs and wants are expressed either alone or together.

Being heard in a contained space is restorative and models a response that quite often is replaced with a rushed need to fix or defend.

What would you most like to be able to say out loud knowing that you would be heard?

Save this for when you need a reminder or send it to someone you love…
Or both ❤️

23/02/2026

Couples therapy isn’t a failure;

Struggling in your relationship should never feel taboo or make you feel less than.

Very few of us are ever well equipped to deal with the issues that relationships throw up.

It’s easy to get caught up in the detail of a fight but much harder to express what’s really going on underneath.

Couples therapy is a place for exploration and growth - not you against each other but instead you both against the problems.

If you’d like to know more - message me. My calendar is open ❤️

15/02/2026

Whether you’re into it or not…Valentine’s Day is the well oiled machine that will ignite that spark or remind you of the cracks you’re papering over.

If you felt close - nurture it. Keep it going.
If you felt distant - pay attention.

And if you’re curious about couples therapy - reach out. There doesn’t need to be a crisis to reap the benefits ❤️

Pop me an email with your desired time and we can go from there aparkertherapy@outlook.com

13/01/2026

What could you do on this ordinary Tuesday for yourself, your partner and your relationship?

12/01/2026

The patterns that tie you up in knots don’t know it’s January. They didn’t get the ‘new year, new you’ memo 😵‍💫

All the goals and motivation in the world won’t change those patterns. Motivation to begin to look at these is absolutely necessary but ‘trying harder’ or setting a goal won’t work.

These patterns are not logical, they’re protective. They’re formed over time individually and relationally with others.

And they’re quite often about keeping us ‘safe’ not happy.

Real change happens when our body feels safe enough to explore and identify those defences.

So if January has given you the motivation to explore - then brilliant, but don’t add more pressure on believing that a little bit of mindset work will do the trick.

If you want some guidance, pop me a message. My diary is open and new slots are available ❤️

12/11/2025

Yes You Can!

There’s nothing I love more in the world than sitting with my friends and talking the back wheels of everything and anything - including relationships!

But sometimes the best thing we can do is talk to someone who can look at the relationship through a less biased lens.

Working as a couples therapist means that I am more naturally not just thinking about what’s in front of me, but the dance between the two of you, even in your partners absence.

I can help you see the patterns that might be escaping you and help you create change that can ripple through the whole relationship.

When you start to grow, the relationship can too.

If you’re curious head to my website to find out more ❤️

07/11/2025

That love that you see in that couple who seem to have it all worked out…that isn’t luck my love - that is work.

That’s the decision to repair after that stupid argument;

It’s the courage to stand still when you want to run a mile;

It’s the curiosity that stokes the fire, not the ambivalence that puts it out.

It’s the willingness to look beyond those automatic reactions and reach for a response.

In what ways you can pause today, take a breath and make small step towards, rather than away.

Where can you say yes ❤️

Save this as a reminder ✨

05/11/2025

You’ve been thinking about it for days; you’ve composed the perfect words and then suddenly you feel small.
Unheard.
Within a micro second, they’re defensive or shut down or worse - minimise what you’re saying.

And on the surface it can feel like they don’t care. And maybe there are times when it is that. But more often than not I witness that shut down because they have quite literally shut down.

There’s overwhelm. A difficulty in handling the emotions that are coming their way.

Sometimes it’s a panic to find the language that fits what’s happening in that moment.

But very rarely is it experienced this way by you. You feel rejected and wonder why you’ve bothered.

Sometimes you might push harder. Pursue for a sign that there’s care or understanding. But instead of pushing harder - pause.

Saying something like “I can see this feels hard to talk about. Can we come back to it when we both feel calmer?” creates safety and collaboration.

And it’s more than tempting to retreat and not try again, but each time you try this and co-create an environment for those conversations to happen - your body remembers.

03/11/2025

I don’t know about you, but I think we’re so often romanced by the number of years people spend together - like longevity itself is the gold seal of success. ⁣
⁣
I still find myself going “ooohhhh” when a couple tells me they’ve been together 20 years. And yet, I know that doesn’t necessarily say anything about happiness or satisfaction, unless those things are actually present. ⁣
⁣
Familiarity can make us forget curiosity. We stop asking, stop wondering, stop discovering. ⁣
⁣
Everything I talk about in my slides can be worked on and remastered, but clinging to longevity like a life raft won’t get you there. ⁣
⁣
Get curious. Stay open.

Reignite that beautiful unknowing. ⁣
⁣
My diary is open for new clients and deep-dive couples intensives. ⁣
⁣

26/10/2025

Silence can be powerful - it can also be excruciating.

Honestly, I am genuinely well seasoned in silence in my sessions - I have experienced a lot of them 😅 But it can be utterly painful when we make a bid for connection with someone and we are met with silence.

It can be interpreted in so many ways - but mostly it’s common to make it mean something negative.

Sometimes no matter how comfortable you are with one another, it simply can feel impossible to find the ‘right’ words. And that’s the key - often the fear of saying the wrong thing is what takes over.

It’s important for both of you to acknowledge how these kinds of interactions make you feel.

And it can really help to establish some helpful strategies in anticipation of this.

Pausing and simply saying ‘I’m struggling to know how respond’

“I’m wondering how you’d like me to support you right now”

“Sometimes I struggle to find the words and I might go silent; please know this isn’t because I don’t care”

Would you prefer silence or for your partner to maybe get it wrong?

Follow for more

24/10/2025

I don’t know if this is for you or for me or for all of us…but that’s what I felt I needed to write today.

It has been a week 😓

And it’s tempting to keep ploughing through like a bulldozer but this weekend feels special. We have 2 Birthdays in the house…(well one next week) but 16 feels like a big one here.

Every part of me wanted to plan a gathering or do something momentous, but my Scorpio boy is chilled. And really - it’s his Birthday, it needs to be his rules.

I’m remembering the 29 year old me - bursting at the seams (in more ways than one) this time 16 years ago. I was so filled with excitement and curiosity about who this little person was going to be and my body was quite literally expanding with love every second.

This year I don’t want to bounce through the weekend checking off to do lists - I want to remember it all.

I want to exhale and reflect and take it all in. I will breathe in some of his scorpio chilledness ❤️

So this is my advice to you - be brave and pause.

Exhale; let the week melt away.

Put the to-do list down.

Make space for whatever’s here…the good, the messy and the in-between.

Here’s to soft moments, deep breaths and presence this weekend.

̇day

Address

York
YO23

Opening Hours

Tuesday	9am - 7pm
Thursday	5pm - 8pm
Friday	9am - 5pm

Website

http://www.aparkertherapy.co.uk/

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