Gráinne Warren Play Therapy

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Gráinne Warren Play Therapy

The Neuroaffirming Therapist

🌟Play therapy & Parent Support
🌟Autistic/ADHD Wellbeing
🌟Consultancy & Education
AuDHD
Mum of 3
Cork, Ireland ☘️

15/10/2025

I wasn’t going to say anything…

But this “overdiagnosing autism” narrative has been echoing louder lately, dressed up in clinical language, wrapped in professionalism, and presented as caution.

And it’s hurting people!

I’m not activated because it’s controversial.
I’m activated because it’s harmful.

Because it questions the legitimacy of entire identities.
Because it keeps systems of power intact.

This post isn’t a debate. It’s a call to look deeper. To listen better. And to stop mistaking outdated, deficit-based frameworks for truth.

The neurodiversity paradigm is not a trend. It’s a paradigm shift, already well underway.

Clinging to the idea that we’re just “getting carried away with diagnoses” is flat-earth thinking. It refuses to see the depth, the clarity, the lived reality of the Autistic neurotype.

I hope these words offer language, clarity and validation for those of us who’ve spent too long trying to prove we exist.

We shouldn’t have to.

08/10/2025

In the latest Middletown Podcast, we chat to play therapist Gráinne Warren about building authentic connections rather than “training” social skills. Gráinne brings years of practice, research and lived experience to her work at Gráinne Warren Play Therapy. She has created a resource focused on supporting young people to create connections that make them comfortable.

🎧To listen-
https://www.middletownautism.com/social-media/alternatives-to-social-skills-training-with-gr-inne-warren-10-2025

📚You can find Gráinne’s resources here: https://grainnewarren.com/

02/09/2025

We hear a lot about kids needing to “learn emotional regulation.”

But here’s the uncomfortable truth: regulation isn’t just a skill to teach, it starts in the nervous system.

Big feelings aren’t failures. Meltdowns, tears, anger, shutdowns - these are the body’s way of coping and signalling, “I need support.”

That doesn’t mean strategies like breathing or mindfulness don’t help - they can! But only if the nervous system already feels safe enough to use them.

✨ True support isn’t expecting a child to regulate themselves. It’s helping their body feel safe and connected, so regulation can happen naturally - and strategies can grow from that foundation.

👉 Instead of asking, “How do I make this child regulate?” try asking, “What support does their nervous system need right now to feel safe?”

09/08/2025

“Let’s Talk About Anger”

What if we spoke to adults about anger the way we speak to children?

What if we handed them a worksheet asking them to rate how angry they feel when their partner lies to them, when they’re mocked at work, or when their neighbour enters their home without permission?

And then, just below that, asked them:
👉 “What coping strategies do you use when this happens? Are they effective?”

Absurd, right?
Even dangerous.

Because these aren’t just “triggers.”
They’re violations, betrayals, injustices, and unmet needs.

But when kids or teens get angry about their boundaries being crossed - being excluded, yelled at, mocked, ignored, or over-controlled - we call it a behaviour problem.

We ask them to manage it.
To breathe through it.
To calm down first, and talk later.
To cope with things that, frankly, they should be angry about.

🔥 Here’s what anger actually is:
• It’s a boundary being crossed.
• A need going unmet.
• A voice trying to be heard.
• A sense of safety being lost.
• A part of us rising up to protect something important.

Anger isn’t the problem.
It’s a signal. A warning light.

And often, a shield for deeper feelings like shame, hurt, loneliness, fear, or powerlessness.

🛑 So instead of asking children to “manage their anger,” maybe we could ask:
• What happened right before the anger showed up?
• What is this anger trying to protect?
• What do you need, right now, that you’re not getting?
• Is there something unfair, unsafe, or overwhelming happening?

When we punish or silence anger in children, we teach them not to trust themselves.

When we sit with it, validate it, and explore what it’s telling us, we build connection, safety, and real emotional understanding.

Anger doesn’t need to be controlled.
It needs to be heard.

21/07/2025

Ever lie in bed at 3am thinking about how elocution lessons and Autistic “social skills” are basically the same thing?

…No? Just me? 🫣

I was remembering a school I worked in where kids had weekly elocution lessons. One of the big ones? Learning to pronounce “th” the right way — tongue between the teeth, clear as day.

But we’re Irish. That sound doesn’t even exist in our language. It always made me uncomfortable.

It got me thinking… Autistic kids are so often taught to speak and act in ways that feel “more typical.”

But like accents, Autistic communication is cultural. It comes with its own rhythm, pace, and honesty. It’s not wrong, just different.

When we teach kids to change how they speak, move, or connect, we’re not just offering support. We’re shaping them around someone else’s standard.

It’s not about fixing or correcting.
It’s about recognising difference, and respecting it.

Because when we only value one way of speaking or connecting, we’re not teaching inclusion. We’re quietly erasing something else.

10/07/2025

There was a moment, in a professional setting, where someone said -

“There’s no such thing as Autistic culture. Autistic people just have needs.”

At the time, I didn’t have the words.
I didn’t have the capacity.
And honestly, I didn’t feel safe enough to push back.

This moment that’s stayed with me for a long time.
It sat in my chest for days, then weeks. I kept turning it over in my head. Not because I was unsure, but because I knew how wrong it was, and I couldn’t stop feeling the weight of what had been dismissed.

So I wrote this post as the response I couldn’t give in that moment. The one I would offer now, from a more rooted place.

It’s for every Autistic person who’s ever felt unseen or flattened by the idea that we’re just a cluster of needs.

Autistic culture is real. It’s alive. And it matters.

Address

Clonakilty

Website

https://linktr.ee/grainnewarren

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