Carmel Farnan Counselling + QHHT Dublin

Carmel Farnan Counselling + QHHT Dublin Established in 2000 Carmel Farnan Counselling Centre has provided Psychotherapy and Counselling to i

Gaslighting 101: It's When Someone Makes You Doubt Your Own RealityGaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation w...
05/03/2026

Gaslighting 101: It's When Someone Makes You Doubt Your Own Reality

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where a person causes someone else to question their memory, perception, or judgement.

It can sound like:

• “That never happened.”
• “You’re imagining things.”
• “You’re too sensitive.”
• “You’re remembering it wrong.”

Over time, gaslighting can leave a person feeling confused, anxious, and unsure of their own experiences. Many people begin to doubt themselves, even when their instincts were accurate.

Gaslighting can happen in romantic relationships, families, friendships, or workplaces. It often develops gradually, making it difficult to recognise at first.

If you have experienced this pattern, it’s important to remember: your feelings and perceptions matter. Trusting yourself again is possible, and support can help you rebuild that confidence.

Counselling can provide a safe space to explore these experiences, strengthen boundaries, and reconnect with your own voice.

DARVO: A Pattern Often Seen in Toxic or Abusive DynamicsHave you ever raised a concern with someone, only to end up feel...
04/03/2026

DARVO: A Pattern Often Seen in Toxic or Abusive Dynamics

Have you ever raised a concern with someone, only to end up feeling like you were the one in the wrong?

You may have experienced DARVO.

DARVO stands for:

• Deny – The person denies the behaviour ever happened.
• Attack – They criticise, blame or undermine you for bringing it up.
• Reverse Victim and Offender – They position themselves as the victim, and you as the problem.

It can leave you feeling confused, guilty, or questioning your own memory. Over time, this pattern can chip away at your confidence and sense of reality.

DARVO is often seen in emotionally abusive relationships, but it can also appear in families, workplaces and friendships.

If this feels familiar, you are not “too sensitive”. Wanting accountability, respect and emotional safety is not unreasonable.

In counselling, we can gently explore patterns like this, rebuild trust in your own perception, and strengthen your boundaries.

You deserve relationships where your voice is heard, not turned against you.

MentalHealthSupport

Your healing doesn’t run on someone else’s timetable.In any type of relationship when trust has been broken, a repair ta...
07/02/2026

Your healing doesn’t run on someone else’s timetable.
In any type of relationship when trust has been broken, a repair takes patience, consistency and accountability, not pressure.

If you’ve been hurt, you are allowed to take the time you need.
If you’ve hurt someone, sitting with discomfort is part of making things right.

Real repair is slow and steady. And it’s built on safety, not immediacy.

If this resonates, you’re not alone 🤍





When anxiety quietly takes over…Many people come to counselling because anxiety has slowly started running the show.It’s...
29/01/2026

When anxiety quietly takes over…

Many people come to counselling because anxiety has slowly started running the show.

It’s not always panic attacks or obvious fear, sometimes it looks like:

• Constant overthinking
• Feeling on edge for no obvious reason
• Struggling to switch off
• Tight shoulders, headaches, or a knotted stomach
• Always bracing for “what if”

If this sounds familiar, a few gentle things that can help right now:

✨ Name the feeling
Simply saying “this is anxiety” (rather than “something is wrong with me”) can take some of its power away.

✨ Ground your body
Anxiety lives in the nervous system. Slow breathing, placing your feet firmly on the floor, or pressing your hands together can help bring you back into the present moment.

✨ Limit reassurance-seeking
Repeatedly checking, googling, or asking others for reassurance can keep anxiety looping. Try noticing the urge without acting on it straight away.

✨ Be kind to yourself
Anxiety isn’t a personal failure, it’s often a sign of a system that’s been under pressure for a long time.

You don’t have to have everything figured out to start feeling better. Every single little step counts 🌱


selfcompassion
carmelfarnancounselling

Do you feel constantly “on edge” or overwhelmed?Stress is so common now that it becomes a ‘normal’ way of life, and your...
28/01/2026

Do you feel constantly “on edge” or overwhelmed?

Stress is so common now that it becomes a ‘normal’ way of life, and your body and mind never get a chance to reset.

Stress isn’t just about having too much on your plate it’s also about carrying too much for too long.

✨ Here are some small ways to ease stress:
• Slow your exhale, longer exhales signal safety to the nervous system
• Ask yourself: “What actually needs my attention right now? Then use the word ‘concentrate’ to join with that and that alone”
• Let go of perfection, “good enough” really is enough. Remember that “good enough” will be different at different times.
• Build short pauses into your day, even 1 minute, every hour on the hour.

As a human being you are not designed to run on empty 🌿

Wellbeing carmelfarnancounselling

Do you feel constantly “on edge” or overwhelmed?Stress is so common now that it becomes a 'normal' way of life, and your...
28/01/2026

Do you feel constantly “on edge” or overwhelmed?

Stress is so common now that it becomes a 'normal' way of life, and your body and mind never get a chance to reset.

Stress isn’t just about having too much on your plate it’s also about carrying too much for too long.

✨ Here are some small ways to ease stress:
• Slow your exhale, longer exhales signal safety to the nervous system
• Ask yourself: “What actually needs my attention right now? Then use the word 'concentrate' to join with that and that alone”
• Let go of perfection, “good enough” really is enough. Remember that "good enough" will be different at different times.
• Build short pauses into your day, even 1 minute, every hour on the hour.

As a human being you are not designed to run on empty 🌿

Living with Narcissism: Living with a narcissistic partner, parent, business colleague or family member can be deeply co...
26/01/2026

Living with Narcissism:
Living with a narcissistic partner, parent, business colleague or family member can be deeply confusing and exhausting

You will experience any/all of the following:
* Constantly criticised or blamed
* Emotionally drained
* Like you’re walking on eggshells
* Confused after conversations
* Betrayal after multiple lies and denial
* As though everything somehow becomes your fault

Over time, this can make you doubt yourself and your reality.
Here are a few supportive coping tips:
Lower expectation: listen to your gut and accept the truth of their limits to reduce repeated hurt
Grey Rock Method: keep your responses brief, neutral, and factual; don’t explain or defend
Strong boundaries: boost your energy where you can by practising even the smallest of self-care

Don’t keep how you are being forced to live secret, instead share with people who can validate your experience. Remember, not everyone is taken in by the Narcissist’s mask. In my 25+ years of counselling I’ve found that the common response is ‘we knew he/she wasn’t genuine’ in their charming façade.

Narcissistic dynamics thrive in silence and isolation. Hearing “you’re not imagining this” and “you’re not the problem” will boost you more than you might realise.

Remember:
You are “not too sensitive”.
You are “not losing your mind”.
This is too big to carry alone.
Your experience is real 🤍

carmelfarnancounselling

Living with Narcissism:Living with a narcissistic partner, parent, business colleague or family member can be deeply con...
26/01/2026

Living with Narcissism:

Living with a narcissistic partner, parent, business colleague or family member can be deeply confusing and exhausting.

You will experience any/all of the following:

* Constantly criticised or blamed
* Emotionally drained
* Like you’re walking on eggshells
* Confused after conversations
* Betrayal after multiple lies and denial
* As though everything somehow becomes your fault

Over time, this can make you doubt yourself and your reality.

Here are a few supportive coping tips:

Lower expectation: listen to your gut and accept the truth of their limits to reduce repeated hurt
Grey Rock Method: keep your responses brief, neutral, and factual; don’t explain or defend
Strong boundaries: boost your energy where you can by practising even the smallest of self-care
Don’t keep how you are being forced to live secret, instead share with people who can validate your experience. Remember, not everyone is taken in by the Narcissist's mask. In my 25+ years of counselling I've found that the common response is 'we knew he/she wasn't genuine' in their charming façade.

Narcissistic dynamics thrive in silence and isolation. Hearing “you’re not imagining this” and “you’re not the problem” will boost you more than you might realise.

Remember:
You are "not too sensitive".
You are "not losing your mind".
This is too big to carry alone.
Your experience is real 🤍

Do you Have Difficulty Saying No?Many people struggle to say No, not because they don’t have boundaries, but because say...
16/01/2026

Do you Have Difficulty Saying No?

Many people struggle to say No, not because they don’t have boundaries, but because saying Yes has become automatic.

When you’re used to accommodating others, the Yes can come out before you’ve had a chance to notice how you actually feel. Often, the taking of a pause that would allow for the choice of saying No, never happens.

Practising a pause can be very powerful. Even a moment, a breath, a few seconds, creates a space to check in with yourself and ask, Do I genuinely want to do this, or do I have the capacity right now?*

A helpful way of re-thinking saying No is this:
Saying no isn’t rejection.
It’s information.

It’s information about your limits, your energy, and your needs in that moment. When shared with honesty, it doesn’t harm connection and relationships, it provides clarity.

You can be kind and boundaried at the same time. Sometimes, learning to say No begins not with the word itself, but with allowing yourself the pause to notice what’s true for you.

💭 The Importance of Your Self-Talk 💭The voice you hear most in your life is your own inner voice. It’s there 24/7, quiet...
13/01/2026

💭 The Importance of Your Self-Talk 💭

The voice you hear most in your life is your own inner voice. It’s there 24/7, quietly commenting on what everything you do, how you feel, and who you think you are. Because it’s always present, we often don’t question it, we simply accept it as fact.

One thing I've noticed in my 20+ years of counselling is that many people speak to themselves in ways they would never speak to anyone else. An important point is that every single thought makes a corresponding feeling, so if you speak negatively to yourself you will make negative feelings.

To start changing any of these negative states a helpful pause can be to ask yourself:
If I said these words to a close friend, would they still feel friendly towards me?

If the answer is no, it may be time to gently challenge your inner dialogue.

🌱 The way you speak to yourself matters.
And no matter how long you’ve been harsh, critical, or unkind towards yourself, you can begin in this very moment to speak more gently and kindly.

Neuroscience shows us that the brain is adaptable and change in the brain can change even in a few hours. Through awareness and practice, we can rewire unhelpful thought patterns, create new neural pathways, and develop a kinder, more supportive inner voice.

Although change doesn’t happen overnight, every compassionate thought is a step in the right direction.

https://www.carmelfarnan.com/

✨ Anxiety: You’re Not Alone ✨Learning to deal successfully with stress and anxiety is what led me to leave my corporate ...
12/01/2026

✨ Anxiety: You’re Not Alone ✨

Learning to deal successfully with stress and anxiety is what led me to leave my corporate career and move into Psychotherapy, so I could help people change, just like I did.

Anxiety is something many people experience at different points in life. It can show up as constant worry, racing thoughts, tension in the body, poor sleep, or a sense of being “on edge”. While anxiety can feel overwhelming, there are gentle steps you can take to help reduce its impact.

💛 Here a few simple ways to ease anxiety:

• Slow your breathing: Try breathing in through your nose for 4 seconds, holding for 2, and breathing out slowly through your mouth for 6. This slow exhale calms your nervous system.

• Ground yourself: Don't attempt to battle with anxious thoughts - you won't win. Instead bring your mind into what's happening around you - we can only think one thought at once. So here you are 'using up' your thoughts in the present moment. To do this notice 5 things you can see, 4 you can hear, 3 you can feel, 2 you can taste, and 1 you can smell. Bringing your attention back to the present moment relaxes the brain and takes you out of Fight or Flight.

• Limit overstimulation: Reduce caffeine, alcohol, and the news and excessive scrolling, especially when you’re feeling anxious.

• Be kind to yourself: Anxiety is not a weakness. Watch your self-talk and speak to yourself as you would to a close friend.

• Reach out for support: Talking to someone you trust or a professional can make a real difference.

🌱 If anxiety is affecting your day-to-day life, support is available. You don’t have to manage it on your own. Once you understand how your mind works you will be able to reduce your anxious thoughts, and be able to control your mind.

Our intuition is our strongest sense - if something feels off then it is.
09/01/2026

Our intuition is our strongest sense - if something feels off then it is.

Address

Seaholm Medical Centre, 10 Holmpatrick
Skerries
00

Opening Hours

Monday 9am - 5:30pm
Tuesday 9am - 5:30pm
Wednesday 9am - 6pm
Thursday 9am - 5:30pm
Friday 9am - 5:30pm

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