Haran R P, Bangalore (2025)

21/10/2025

Gratitude Series | Post 3 – To My Students

Making Perfect Students - Is it the GOAL?

Many times, a teacher/counsellor might feel that students are stupid and lose their sanity while handling their demanding nature. My journey taught me a few important lessons, and I would like to share them here.

- Students need space to make mistakes. Mistakes often come from curiosity, not laziness.
- If we nurture and direct that curiosity instead of killing it, students flourish. So, never scold or shame them for trying. Effort deserves recognition.
- I celebrated not just the top scorers, but “star performers”, those who improved compared to their previous exam. Growth deserves applause.
- Empathy changes everything. The frustrations we feel about students, they feel about teachers, too. Many walks into class carrying burdens: a skipped breakfast, a crowded bus ride, family conflicts. These are heavy for a young mind. Instead of comparing our struggles with theirs, it helps to step into their shoes.

I learnt to pay extra attention to the students who disliked me the most. Winning their trust often turned into the strongest bonds. Once you touch their hearts, their commitment to learning follows naturally. Yes, it takes extra effort, but sometimes that small effort can change the course of a student’s life.

The reward? At my farewell, I witnessed something unforgettable. Students, including alumni, returned, shed tears, wrote letters, and filled the day with photographs and memories that made me feel like an important person. In that moment, I realised: the tenfold love I received was only a reflection of the minimal care and empathy I tried to show them.

So, does that mean students look forward to a perfect teacher/counsellor? Actually, they want someone who is open to understanding them and changing their approaches based on what the student wants.

To my students: thank you for teaching me that empathy, patience, and understanding others' perspectives.

14/10/2025

Gratitude Series | Post 2 – To My Principal

Among the many people I’m grateful to in my journey, my principal holds a very special place. He was one of the senior-most in the institution, while I was the junior-most. Yet, never once did he make me feel like "just a Junior".

Whenever I approached him with an idea, he would patiently listen, explain the challenges of implementation, and then encourage me if the idea had merit. I still remember once sharing how some colleagues doubted my ability to counsel students, saying, “How can someone without children understand problems of children?” His response stays with me even today: “Then every doctor must first break their bone before treating fractures.” That single statement shifted my perspective and gave me courage.

Though not from a psychology background, he was a true visionary. He would emphasise that a counselling room must always be a safe space, a place where students can simply talk and feel heard, not where they are pressured to visit only when there is something deeply emotional. He recognised my work early on, trusted me with greater responsibilities, and never once denied any initiative that aimed at student well-being.

I also admire his simplicity and approachable nature. Many students would often ask, “Why is he so simple?” And the answer was clear: he chose to keep his door open (literally), be warm, fun-loving, and approachable, because he believed leadership meant being accessible. That mindset inspired me to adopt the same approachability with students.

His support went far beyond routine responsibilities. From helping me connect with psychology lecturers of other colleges to enabling academic resources like books and lab materials, he ensured the process was smooth, if it benefited students. I’ve also witnessed his composure in complex student issues, whether visiting students’ houses, resolving sensitive matters, or even when legal interventions were required. Through it all, he stood firmly with us, teaching me how to process and handle difficult situations with balance.

For all of this, I remain deeply grateful. His trust, guidance, and vision not only shaped my work but also shaped me as a professional and as a person. Thank you, Mr Vinod Amrithraj M sir

07/10/2025

Gratitude Series | Post 1 – To My First Colleagues

This is about joining a workplace right after my master’s. Entering the teaching community as one of the youngest, I faced resistance. Many wondered if I was “too young” for both teaching and counselling. Some even questioned: “How can someone without children understand parents’ or kids' challenges?”

This went further. When students became comfortable with me, concerns arose: Am I being too friendly? Too lenient? And also, we should agree that students make use of the friendly staff to make excuses. When counsellors are paid similarly to teachers, there were thoughts on whether they have enough workload.

At first, these doubts made me feel frustrated. But I realised the issue was not with students, colleagues, or me. It was with transparency and communication. So, I made changes in the structure.
- Mandating at least 18 student sessions per week
- Organised monthly student engagement/awareness activities
- Kept authorities informed about important concerns
- Biannually asked colleagues what they expected from counselling services
- Partnered with teachers by saying: “This student is struggling due to various reasons. Can you guide them academically?”

This approach made colleagues feel included and students feel better supported. In two years, I earned a space in both groups that I am deeply grateful for.
The most touching part? When I resigned, many colleagues, teaching and non-teaching, surprised me with small souvenirs and heartfelt words. Looking back, I realised it was not the big things, but the small gestures that built trust: greeting them, checking in, asking “Have you eaten?”, or simply sharing a smile.

My takeaway for newcomers in the field: Challenges will come, but every challenge is an opportunity to prove yourself and grow. Be open, stay consistent, and remember in a busy world, everyone just wants to be heard.

30/09/2025

Graduation Reflections: Joy, Growth & The Responsibility of Bonding with Students

It’s been a while since the graduation ceremony took place, but the emotion from that day still lingers in my heart. Watching students hold back tears as they lit candles and symbolically carried the light of learning into the real world reminded me why we do what we do. The essence of meaningful education lies in when students don’t just leave with a certificate, but with a feeling of belonging, and a memory worth missing.

When students miss their classrooms, we know we did the right thing. If students walk away thinking “Thank God that’s over!” then we’ve failed not just as educators, but as an education system. But thankfully, my experience has been different. Across the past four batches I’ve had the privilege to teach, I’ve witnessed emotional goodbyes, heartfelt messages, and a classroom culture that was built on empathy, respect, and shared growth. These students didn’t just learn from me; I learnt from them. They helped me evolve, experiment, and understand how to connect more authentically. My teaching strategies and classroom approach shifted through these interactions.

This interestingly introduced incredible healing about walking into a classroom. For me, it’s been a space where, even on an overwhelming day, can be changed by a student’s smile, question, or thoughtful reflection. One of the most humbling lessons I’ve learned is "What may feel like a small gesture from our side often feels like a mountain moved from theirs" A simple word of encouragement, a moment of understanding, it all matters deeply to a student.
It taught me that the moment you begin to understand your students, they start understanding you too.

As much as I cherish emotional connections with students, I also feel it is important to acknowledge the fine line between bonding and boundary crossing. In recent years, I’ve observed situations where boundaries blur, and this connection is hated by a group of students.

Here are some common boundary concerns educators should reflect on:

Special rules for special students – Rules should apply to everyone equally. Consistency promotes fairness and prevents perceptions of favouritism.

Over-involvement in personal matters – It’s okay to listen, but it’s not okay to take action beyond institutional protocols.

Physical boundaries – Affection should never involve touch without mutual concern.

Personal gifts – Giving or receiving special gifts from specific students can appear exclusive and biased.

Meetings outside the institution – Avoid one-on-one meetings outside campus. Even well-intended gestures can send the wrong message.

We often talk about how student-teacher bonds shape lives, and they do. But bonds become beautiful only when held with care.

So, as we celebrate the relationships we form, let’s also honour the responsibility that comes with them. A teacher’s influence is lasting. Let it be ethical, inclusive, and empowering.

25/09/2025

Observing Mental Health Awareness Days: More than Conventional Observation

Mental health awareness days, like World Mental Health Day, are often marked by events, posters, and general mental health awareness talks. But to truly make an impact, such observances must go beyond formality. They must be intentional, community-specific, and emotionally relevant.

In educational institutions, especially among school and college students, the mental health landscape is constantly evolving. Adolescents today face a unique blend of academic pressure, social comparison, lifestyle imbalance, and emotional vulnerability. Generic conversations aren’t enough. What they need are initiatives that speak to their lived realities.

This year, St.Joseph's Indian Composite PU College and St Joseph's Indian High School chose to mark World Mental Health Day with two focused themes that are rooted in a real concern observed among our student community:

The first addressed the connection between food preferences and mental clarity, especially the unnoticed but significant impact of junk and fast food on students' focus, mood, and academic performance.

The second acknowledged the emotional toll of losing a peer and took a compassionate approach to rebuild hope and resilience, dismantling the notion of ending life as a solution.

What stood out wasn’t the number of sessions or the quality of presentations, but the fact that these themes emerged from real observation and need. Students didn’t just attend; they engaged. They reflected. Some of them even reshaped their own perspectives, whether about food habits or the value of seeking help.

Observing days like this should not be about ticking boxes. Instead, they are opportunities to pause, listen, and respond. By customising, we are saying, “We see you, we hear you, and we care about what matters to you right now.”
This approach fosters deeper student engagement, Early awareness and intervention before issues escalate, A sense of safety and openness to talk about mental health without fear or stigma, Long-term mindset shifts, not just event-day motivation

Mental health observances become impactful when we stop generalising and start personalising. As counsellors, our role is to bring mental health closer to our students’ world, not as a theory, but as a lived experience. And by doing so, we don’t just mark a day, we spark a movement.

Thank you, Ms Mana Shah, Ms Merlin Michelle Dsouza, Mr Srinath Pappu Ms Khubi Jain, Ms Khushi Srivastava, and Mr Mithun Karthikeyan from Christ university kengeri campus for volunteering to facilitate these sessions.

09/03/2025

Promoting Well-being in Educational Institutions

It was an enriching experience to represent in the Poster Presentation and Live Poster-Making Competition conducted by the National Institute of Mental Health and Neuroscience, Bangalore (NIMHANS) on instilling well-being in educational institutions. I had the privilege of representing St. Joseph's Indian Composite Pre-University College and St.Joseph's Indian High School, with students from both institutions showcasing their enthusiasm and knowledge alongside participants from other schools.

What made this competition truly special was witnessing students go beyond textbook learning to explore the practical applications of psychology in real-life school settings. In India, applied psychology at the school level is not always emphasized, making experiences like these crucial for real-time learning and exposure.

A highlight of the event was Prof. Dr. Seema Mehrotra, the coordinator of this youth engagement initiative, who took the time to break down complex psychological concepts for students struggling with technical terms. Her approachable and student-centred approach ensured that the competition remained a learning experience rather than just a contest. I truly appreciated her efforts, which is why I made sure to capture a moment with her!

During our extended lunch break, the students explored the Nimhans Bengaluru Heritage Museum and Brain Museum, where they engaged with interactive exhibits and real human brain specimens. This hands-on experience deepened their understanding of mental health care and neuroscience, making learning both exciting and impactful!

With great preparation and teamwork, I’m proud to share that:
The St.joseph's Indian Composite Pre-University College students secured First Place in the Live Poster Making Competition and St. Joseph's Indian High School students received a Special Mention for their efforts!

A huge thanks to the Positive Psychology Unit under the Department of Clinical Psychology, National Institute of Mental Health and Neurosciences, Bangalore, for this wonderful initiative. Grateful for the support from Microsoft India & Indian Council of Medical Research(ICMR), New Delhi, and appreciation to the organizing team and Jomy T Jose for their coordination till the last moment.

To add to the joy, I also got to reconnect with my post-grad classmate and friend, Amoolya C A, who was representing another institution. Catching up after a long time and seeing how far we have come professionally was a cherry on top!

This experience reaffirmed the importance of engaging students in hands-on psychology activities, fostering deeper understanding, and encouraging collaborative learning across institutions. Looking forward to more such impactful engagements!

16/02/2025

Vartah 3.0

I had the incredible opportunity to participate in Vartah 3.0, a two-day National School Counsellors' Summit organized by GD Goenka University in collaboration with Fortis Healthcare. The event, held at GD Goenka University, Delhi NCR, brought together professionals and experts to discuss the pressing issue of the pressure of competitive exams and the alarming rise in student su***des. Experts shed light on the critical role of school counsellors in providing emotional and academic support to students navigating these challenges.

The summit featured insightful panel discussions and guest seminars by esteemed speakers, each offering valuable perspectives on mental health interventions in educational settings. They also emphasised how parents, schools and media are the main culprits behind the students' su***de. The discussion on how empathy with responsibility, effective coping mechanisms and non-judgemental space will support students was brought up smoothly without offending the stakeholders. I appreciate the efforts of the speakers in highlighting the best practices that reinforced the importance of early intervention, emotional well-being, and holistic student support in schools.

I extend my heartfelt gratitude to Prof Dr Kim Menezes, Vice Chancellor, Dr. Anjali Midha Sharan, Dean, School of Liberal Arts and GD Goenka University for their generosity in providing me with this opportunity to participate in this summit.

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09/02/2025

Exploring Qualitative Comparative Research: A Learning Experience

I had the opportunity a year ago to be a part in organising an international workshop lead by Dr Leemamol Mathew, Associate Professor at Christ University, Kengeri Campus Christ University, Bangalore. The workshop featured esteemed speakers, including Dr Erika Gubrium, Dr Alejandro Miranda-Nieto, Dr Gustavo Sugahara from OsloMet - Oslo Metropolitan University, and Dr Sony Pellissery from the National Law School of India University, Bangalore.

The focus of the workshop was Qualitative Comparative Research (QCR)—a topic that truly piqued my interest. Traditionally, comparison has been a term closely associated with quantitative research, but this workshop shed light on how comparative methodologies can also be effectively applied in qualitative studies. It was an insightful experience that broadened my perspective on research methodologies.

Grateful for the enriching discussions and the opportunity to learn from such distinguished experts!

26/01/2025

SEEDING INTEREST IN LEARNING

Engaging students in a classroom can sometimes be a challenging task, especially when you're trying to teach abstract concepts. Recently, I was teaching my PUC students about Methods of Inquiry in Psychology specifically, the observation method and its various types like controlled, laboratory, participant, and non-participant. It was the last hour of the day, and as you might expect, the energy in the room was low, and the interest level wasn’t particularly high.

The next topic on the syllabus was Developmental Psychology. While discussing it, I realized that even though my students had experienced their own childhood and were now navigating adolescence, they struggled to see the differences in behaviours, maturity levels, and perspectives between these stages. They felt there wasn’t much to explore. Childhood seemed so simple to them.

To break this perception and make the session engaging, I decided to take the class outside the traditional four walls. I took my PUC students to the primary school playground during dismissal time, the moment when little kids were running around, heading home after the final bell.
I gave my students a simple task: OBSERVE. Observe the behaviours, interactions, and actions of these young children, which they wouldn’t see themselves doing now. Soon enough, the students were fully immersed, observing and even laughing at the kids’ antics. After the session, I asked them to share their observations.

Their insights were fascinating:
- “Kids were choosing friends based on sharing snacks.”
- “They ran down the corridors without any hesitation.”
- “They shouted and called their friends without caring about who was watching.”
- “They got their shoes dirty and didn’t seem to mind.”
- “They didn’t feel embarrassed about being loud or playful.”

It was heartening to see their perspectives shift as they reflected on these behaviours. I reminded them that they, too, were once like this and not too long ago. What seemed funny at first soon turned into a moment of self-realization.

This was the perfect opportunity to connect it back to Developmental Psychology. I explained how these seemingly trivial behaviours are significant in understanding developmental stages and how the observation method helps us study such transitions and patterns in psychology.

That session wasn’t just about teaching; it was about creating a moment of connection, reflection, and understanding. Sometimes, learning happens best when we step outside the classroom and let real-life experiences do the teaching.

26/12/2024

MEMORABLE LUNCH HOUR

As a student counsellor at PU College, I strongly believe that interacting with students beyond the walls of the counselling room is essential to building trust and breaking the stigma around seeking help. But let’s be honest, it’s not an easy job! You need to work hard to gain their acceptance and make them feel comfortable.

Here’s a light-hearted yet thought-provoking incident that I’d like to share from one such interaction.

One lunch hour, a group of students barged into my cabin and sat just to chat. I told them I was busy with some work, but teenagers being teenagers, they didn’t give up. What happened next took me by surprise. They were just talking among themselves, and suddenly, they decided to turn the tables on me and “diagnose” me as a counsellor!

They grabbed a red pen from my desk and started role-playing as counsellors. One of them asked, “You look tired. What’s the reason?” Another quickly chimed in, joking, “It must be depression.” Then, they started analyzing possible reasons for my “tiredness,” using the counselling terminologies they’d picked up during their sessions with me.

In a grand finale, they scribbled down their “diagnosis,” changed their names for “confidentiality” (with made-up signatures to match), and gleefully “certified” me with their findings.

While this playful interaction might make some wonder if it crosses professional boundaries, I see it differently. For me, it’s a testament to the kind of rapport I aim to build with students. Moments like these show that they see the counselling room not as a sombre, serious place but as a safe space where they can engage, express, and even laugh.

And the beauty of such moments? These same students will go out and share their experiences with their peers, spreading the word that the counsellor is approachable, relatable, and, yes - FUN! This, in turn, helps break the stigma surrounding counselling among the student crowd and encourages more of them to reach out when they need help.

As a counsellor, I feel it’s essential to balance professional seriousness with moments of light and loose chats with students. These informal connections help foster trust and normalize the idea of seeking support. Therapy rooms are not just spaces for mourning or tough conversations. They can also be places where students find joy and leave with a smile. So, next time a group of students starts joking around with you, remember it might just be their way of saying, “We trust you.” And isn’t that what counselling is all about?

Let’s continue building those bridges and breaking those barriers, one conversation at a time.

15/12/2024

Classes Beyond the Classroom: Unconventional Approach

Traditional classroom setups are no longer enough to captivate today’s students. With so much variety and innovation in every aspect of their lives, why should education remain same to 4 walls and regular methods? As an educator, my belief is simple: students should love to attend my class.

To make this work, I’ve adopted unconventional methods in my classes, and the results have been surprising! Some of my practices in class are:
1. Freedom in Learning
Students can sit wherever they want. If a student doesn’t feel like participating in the discussion for the day, they can sit on the last bench and have their own time (as long as it doesn’t disturb and isn’t a recurring habit - not more than 2 classes in a week)
2. Catering to Basic Needs
Missed breakfast or hungry before lunch? No problem! They are allowed to eat quietly in class because let’s face it—no one can focus while thinking about food
3. Balancing Time
In a 55-minute class, I teach for 40-45 minutes and leave the rest to interact and connect with one another. In their busy time, students rarely get time to build rapport with their peers, which builds teamwork and communication skills. (We all know the truth that expecting an ideal condition of 100% attention throughout the class is not at all possible)
4. Encouraging Curiosity
Students are free to stop the lecture at any time to ask questions—whether they’re relevant to the topic or not. This sparks curiosity and often leads to very interesting discussions!

Of course, these practices might concern discipline, but my approach focuses on understanding classroom dynamics rather than forcing rigid rules. Sometimes I handle disruptions by
- Walking around the class and engaging with students, mainly troublemakers.
- Talk friendly or involve them by asking some questions instead of shouting
- Using examples of their behaviour in class with humour to explain psychological concepts (by mentioning the trouble makers name) —making the class both relatable and fun

The result?
- Happier, more engaged students
- Improved participation in both curricular and co-curricular acts
- Boost in attendance, even during extra sessions
- And yes, better academic performance!

As educators, we need to adapt to the changing needs of students. Today’s learners crave variety, flexibility, and a sense of belonging in classroom. Creating academic interest among them isn’t easy, but when we meet them where they are, it transforms both their learning experience and our teaching journey.
I’ve found that standing with the students rather than against them has helped me reach my goals as a lecturer. And nothing is more fulfilling than seeing a student develop a genuine interest in learning—not just for the subject, but for life itself.
Let’s continue to evolve and inspire the next generation of learners!

09/12/2024

Faculty Development Programme on MENTORING AND COUNSELLING

I had the privilege of attending a Faculty Enrichment Programme on Mentoring and Counselling, organized by St.joseph's Indian Composite Pre-University College for all its lecturers. The initiative stems from the institution's core belief in the transformative power of mentorship, where teachers can connect with students beyond the confines of the classroom, understanding their lives, challenges, and aspirations.

Having worked closely with educational institutions, I’ve observed how metropolitan cities like Bengaluru bring unique challenges for students, ranging from family-related issues to peer pressure. Mentorship plays a vital role in identifying these concerns early on and offering guidance or support to help students navigate them.

The Jesuit education model has always emphasized holistic development, and this mentoring program perfectly aligns with their vision. Through this initiative, teachers can actively screen and identify students who may require additional support and refer those with more intense concerns to the counseling department for professional help.

The session was skillfully conducted by Dr. Rekha R Ahuja, Coordinator of Samagra - St Joseph’s Holistic Wellness Centre. Her insights and expertise in the field provided us with valuable tools and perspectives to better support our students, especially in these increasingly complex times. Kudos to St Joseph’s Indian Composite PU College for taking this impactful step towards enhancing faculty-student relationships and addressing student well-being with such care and thoughtfulness.

Here’s to fostering stronger mentor-student connections and contributing to a healthier, happier student community!

Haran R P

21/10/2025

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07/10/2025

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25/09/2025

09/03/2025

16/02/2025

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