Regina Nthenya Mulili

19/11/2025

31/10/2025

31/10/2025

We’re drawn to people who embody the parts of us we had to bury.

You were told to be quiet, so you fall for someone bold.
You were forced to be responsible, so you crave someone carefree.
You were taught to hold it together, so their emotional honesty feels magnetic.

But here’s the catch,
What we admire, we later resent.

That confidence starts to feel “too loud.”
That freedom feels “irresponsible.”
That emotional depth becomes “too much.”

It’s not really them you’re mad at,
it’s the reflection of the part of you you’re still not comfortable with.

We put people on pedestals for living the parts of us we’ve suppressed…
Then we pull them down when they stop performing our fantasy of freedom.

You don’t actually want them.
You want the version of you they remind you of.

That’s where the healing begins
when you stop projecting,
and start reclaiming.

01/10/2025

You dont require long essays to feel heard and seen

29/09/2025

Did you know attachment theory was first introduced back in the 1950s by John Bowlby? ❤️

At its core, attachment theory is about how we, as humans, connect with each other to give and receive love. It’s about feeling safe, seen, and cared for. Every relationship we form—romantic, family, or friendships—flows from this.

Here’s the thing:
👉 With secure attachment, we learn that people can be trusted. They’ll show up for us, meet our needs, share honestly, and even give us second chances.

👉 With avoidant attachment, we learn the opposite—that we’re not safe. So we pull back, stay away from others, and convince ourselves we can only rely on ourselves.

👉 With anxious attachment, we carry a deep belief that we’re not good enough, that something is wrong with us. We constantly seek validation and chase safety in others.

👉 And then there’s disorganized attachment, often born from trauma. It’s a mix of both anxious and avoidant—where you might cling tightly in one moment, and shut down the next. Highly adaptive, but also exhausting.

At the end of the day, attachment is the foundation of how we love, trust, and even how we heal. 💭

✨ Question for you: Do you know your attachment style?

❤️ 🧘🏾‍♀️

19/09/2025

When people talk about abuse, they usually picture bruises and scars. But you know the deepest wounds often come without a mark, emotional abuse. The kind that chips away at your spirit until you start doubting your own worth.

Maybe you grew up in a house where “jokes” were daggers. Where being called “useless” or “stupid” was normal. Where love was never safe, it was conditional. If you behaved, you got crumbs of kindness. If you slipped up, you got punished with silence that stretched for days.

Do you remember the first time you said, “That hurt me”? And instead of comfort, you heard, “You’re too sensitive. Toughen up.” So you did. You toughened up so much that you stopped feeling. You learned to hide the pain, even from yourself.

That’s what emotionally abusive parents do. They don’t just hurt you in childhood, they teach you to mistrust your feelings, to question your reality, to believe that love always comes with humiliation.

But here’s the truth: their words were lies, not your identity. Healing means finding your voice again and telling yourself, “I am enough. I always was.”

👉 If this feels like your story, you’re not alone. Drop a comment below because silence may have been your survival then, but the truth is your freedom now.

17/09/2025

Growing up with a narcissistic parent is like living in a play you never auditioned for. They’re the star, the director, and the audience all in one and you? You’re just a prop.

I’ll never forget this one day I came home excited, waving my little drawing from art class. I was proud, really proud. But before I could even explain, the words hit me like a slap: “That’s nothing special. Why can’t you be more like so-and-so’s child?”

Do you know what that does to a child? You start shrinking. You start learning that joy isn’t safe, that love has strings attached, that approval comes only when it benefits them. Narcissistic parents don’t raise childre they manufacture supply. Your worth is measured by how well you make them shine.
And here’s the kicker: even as adults, that script follows us. You apologize for existing. You doubt your worth. You chase love that feels like punishment, because that’s what “love” looked like at home.

But let me tell you something I had to claw my way into believing: you are not their mirror anymore. You are your own damn light.

So if you grew up in that fire, I see you. You’re not too broken. You’re not ungrateful. And you don’t have to keep playing their role.

🔥 Your healing is rebellion.
🔥 Your joy is protest.
🔥 Your boundaries are power.

👉 Have you lived this too? Drop your story below. Let’s stop pretending and start telling the truth because silence is how they win, and healing is how we break the cycle.

15/09/2025

A Fool and his money, are soon parted.

18/08/2025

Are you looking to heal? You are in the right place.

18/08/2025

Practice saying No until it becomes a habit.