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Dr.kimutai, Nairobi (2025)

21/10/2025

There was Drama in Siaya after Mwalimu Jini was Caught pants down Conducting Extracurricular Lessons in Someone’s Matrimonial Laboratory. The respected head-teacher was caught red-handed conducting Horizontal Engineering practical lessons with the wife of a local bodaboda rider. Sources say the teacher had gone to mark homework, but ended up marking territory that wasn’t his.

The unsuspecting husband was out there riding his kifikifi, sweating for unga money, thinking his wife was home washing utensils. Out of nowhere, he received a distress call from Onyiso, the village unofficial NIS Director, saying “Omera, kuna mtu ameingia kwa boma yako, and your wife has been clapping since morning without singing!”

Okada man automatically knew that, that wasn't hands clapping, it was another man receiving applause from Nyako’s Sianda madwong for proper eating the food that faces the earth eat kisumoo. The bodaboda rider sped home like a GP racer on caffeine, only to find his wife mounted like a transformer, while Mwalimu was busy connecting her to electricity without KPLC clearance. The man almost fainted!

In a fit of righteous anger armed with a panga, he stripped both the teacher and his wife naked and paraded them on bodabodas around town in a full-blown Rally of Shame. The crowd cheered, kids screamed, and even dogs barked in confusion.

But honestly, the punishment was biased, the woman was left wearing wandawea, while poor Mwalimu was left matako wazi, looking like a plucked chicken under the midday sun. But kusema ukweli, Mwalimu took one for the team because hii watu ya kifikifi have been chewing our womenz mercilessly.

Truth be told, these bodaboda guys have been riding & delivering more than passengers for years, now tables have turned, and the delivery was finally received with interest. I'll leave you with a Sikhendu proverb that says “Bibi ya mtu sumu na mume wa mtu tamu k**a Osumbuko ya club 1824.” K**a kawa sisi walala hoii hatuna maoni, Letu Jicho tu. 👀

28/07/2025

Another Comrade Down: Missionary Journey Gone Wrong!!

We have lost another brave comrade in the line of duty. Omwami Kavengo, a university lecturer, has officially logged out while transmitting high voltage electricity along Kilgoris Lane. According to reports, he collapsed in the act of serving humanity in the most horizontal way possible.

Apparently, our brother took a whole energy drink, ready to show this female student KDF level bedroom tactics. His goal was to cum, kumbe the mission was to go straight to Sayuni. The young lady who doubles as the owner of the power grid, said Omwami had promised to showcase the syllabus of seduction.

They did five full rounds of horizontal engineering, but on the 6th, Omwami's engine knocked, system overload, battery fried, motherboard crashed. Lakini kusema Ukweli, five rounds yawa! Even a hired Probox is not pushed like that! Omwami treated the food that faces the earth like it was his last meal, and indeed, it was.

Men, let's be guided. You can’t win a gold medal in s*x. There's no trophy, no certificate, not even airtime. Just exhaustion, kaswende, malaria kubwa, hospital bed, or early check-in to Sayuni Airbnb. Mature men know that one strong, focused round is enough. But boys want to run relays in a bedroom with no finish line.

But nobody is talking about madam transformer. The lady comfortably collected 5 rounds, arms folded, waiting for round 6, 7, 8, even possibly 9. Aki women are dangerous. You’ll think you’re the one on top, kumbe you’re the sacrifice.

Now, the Eulogy will say, “He died after a short illness.” But we all know the real illness was Segendo Pressure Syndrome. Aki Goat wives are suffering out there, sending their men out with 100% battery and getting them back in Airplane Mode.

Anyway, Rest In Power Legend Kavengo. You have left a gap that even the VC of Kalahari unifastii with his 6" curved makagare can’t fill. Shine on your way Omwami. The land of Sayuni welcomes you with open arms and an ice pack to cool the bolingos. Na k**a kawa siku zote sisi walala hoii hatuna maoni, Letu Jicho tu.👀

11/06/2025

Life care hospital eldoret is now displaying quacksm at its best .
It's a one way to heaven

29/05/2025

In the river between,
Waiyaki never denounced Nyambura,
He loved her so much,
Not even when the tribe subjected them to be disciplined by the Kiama elders because of their forbidden love
That is what Ngugi wa Thio'ngo informed us in his book,
Ironically,
It has happened,
The test of a lifetime has visited the legend on his sick bed,

The woes of love,
He thought she loved him,
He thought she would love him for better or for worse just like Waiyaki to Nyambura in the river between.

Ngugi met Njeeri in exile and he was smitten by her beauty and intellect,
He wrote to her sweet messages of love,
Njeeri had no option but to fall head over heels for the man with the magic pen.

Ngugi was in love in his sunset years,
Maybe he loved more than Waiyaki loved Nyambura in his epic book,

We thought Njeeri being younger would make the sunset years of the legend lighter,
It was not to be,
Njeeri forgot the sweet words,
She never saw the genius lover who weaved words more than the Weaver bird would weave it's nest,
She totally forgot the man who almost lost his life trying to protect her from the attackers who had raided their house when they had visited their motherland.

Njeeri did not flinch serving divorce papers to a man on his sick bed,
She did not care for the man whose kidneys had failed,
She did care of his sickly heart,
She did not care,
Now that the old man was becoming a burden,
She had to move on and maybe hike another ride of love,
Maybe,
Just maybe,
To the man who sharpened our minds,
We are sorry for the unprecedented woes of ill health and love ungrateful.

22/04/2025

Alcoholism, also known as alcohol use disorder (AUD), is a chronic disease characterized by an inability to control or stop drinking despite negative consequences. It can range from mild to severe and often includes a strong craving for alcohol, loss of control over drinking, and physical dependence.

Key Signs of Alcoholism:

Drinking more or longer than intended

Unsuccessful efforts to cut down or stop drinking

Spending a lot of time drinking or recovering from its effects

Cravings or strong urges to drink

Neglecting responsibilities at work, school, or home

Continued drinking despite social or health problems

Developing a tolerance (needing more to feel the same effects)

Experiencing withdrawal symptoms when not drinking

Causes and Risk Factors:

Genetics

Psychological factors (like depression or anxiety)

Environmental influences (like peer pressure or stress)

Starting alcohol use at an early age

Effects on Health:

Liver damage (cirrhosis, hepatitis)

Heart disease

Brain damage and cognitive impairment

Increased risk of cancer

Mental health disorders

Treatment Options:

Detox and withdrawal management

Behavioral therapies (CBT, motivational therapy)

Medications (e.g., naltrexone, acamprosate, disulfiram)

Support groups (e.g., Alcoholics Anonymous)

Inpatient or outpatient rehab programs

Would you like information on how to help someone with alcoholism, or resources for treatment and recovery?

21/04/2025

As of December 2024, the GMC officially began regulating PAs and AAs, marking a significant step in formalizing these roles within the UK's healthcare system. This regulation aims to establish robust educational and professional standards, enhancing patient safety and accountability.

The debate continues regarding the integration of PAs and AAs into the National Health Service (NHS). While proponents argue that these roles can alleviate pressures on doctors and improve patient access to care, critics caution against the potential for increased healthcare inequalities and the dilution of medical expertise, especially in underserved areas.

18/04/2025

Effects of diabetes mellitus on body organs

Diabetes can affect nearly every system in the body. Here are the main effects, categorized by body system:

1. Cardiovascular System

Increased risk of heart disease and stroke

High blood pressure

Poor blood circulation (can lead to peripheral artery disease)

2. Nervous System (Neuropathy)

Numbness, tingling, or pain in hands and feet

Digestive problems (due to autonomic neuropathy)

Erectile dysfunction

3. Kidneys (Nephropathy)

Kidney damage or failure

Protein in urine (early sign)

4. Eyes (Retinopathy)

Blurred vision

Risk of blindness

Cataracts and glaucoma

5. Skin

Increased

16/04/2025

What is high blood pressure?

Hypertension, also known as high blood pressure, is a condition where the force of the blood against your artery walls is consistently too high. Over time, this can lead to health problems like heart disease, stroke, and kidney damage.

Types of Hypertension

1. Primary (essential) hypertension – develops gradually over time without a specific cause.

2. Secondary hypertension – caused by another medical condition, like kidney disease or hormonal disorders.

Normal Blood Pressure Range

Normal:

15/04/2025

What is Diabetes?

Diabetes is a chronic condition that affects how your body turns food into energy. It involves problems with the hormone insulin, which helps glucose (sugar) from food get into your cells for energy.

There are three main types of diabetes:

1. Type 1 Diabetes – An autoimmune condition where the body attacks insulin-producing cells in the pancreas. Usually diagnosed in children or young adults. People with type 1 need daily insulin.

2. Type 2 Diabetes – The most common type. The body becomes resistant to insulin or doesn’t make enough. Often linked to lifestyle factors like diet, weight, and activity levels.

3. Gestational Diabetes – Occurs during pregnancy and usually goes away after birth, but it increases the risk of type 2 diabetes later on

14/04/2025

To check safe days (i.e., days when you're least likely to get pregnant), you can use the calendar method, which is based on tracking your menstrual cycle. Here's a simple way to do it:

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Step-by-Step Guide to Check Safe Days

1. Track Your Cycle

You need to know the length of your cycle for at least 6 months. Day 1 is the first day of your period. A typical cycle is 28 days, but it can range from 21–35 days.

2. Identify Your Fertile Window

Ovulation (when you’re most fertile) typically occurs about 14 days before your next period. The fertile window includes:

5 days before ovulation

The day of ovulation

1 day after ovulation

So, for a 28-day cycle, fertile days are usually days 10 to 16.

3. Safe Days

These are days outside the fertile window:

Day 1 to Day 7 of your cycle (early)

Day 21 to the end of the cycle (late)

4. Use an App or Calendar

Apps like Flo, Clue, or Period Calendar can help you track and calculate safe days more accurately.

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Important Notes:

This method is not 100% reliable.

It works best if your cycle is very regular.

Use additional contraception (like condoms) if avoiding pregnancy is important.

Would you like help calculating your safe days based on your last few periods? I can do that if you give me the dates.

14/04/2025

The menstrual cycle is a monthly process that a woman's body goes through to prepare for a possible pregnancy. It’s regulated by hormones and typically lasts about 28 days, but it can range from 21 to 35 days in adults.

Here’s a breakdown of the four main phases:

1. Menstrual Phase (Days 1–5)

What happens: The uterine lining (endometrium) sheds if there’s no pregnancy, resulting in menstrual bleeding.

Hormones: Estrogen and progesterone levels are low.

2. Follicular Phase (Days 1–13)

What happens: The pituitary gland releases FSH (follicle-stimulating hormone), stimulating the ovaries to develop follicles. One becomes dominant and prepares to release an egg.

Hormones: Estrogen rises to help rebuild the uterine lining.

3. Ovulation (Around Day 14)

What happens: A mature egg is released from the o***y.

Hormones: A surge in LH (luteinizing hormone) triggers ovulation.

Fertile window: This is the most fertile time in the cycle.

4. Luteal Phase (Days 15–28)

What happens: The ruptured follicle becomes the corpus luteum, which secretes progesterone to maintain the uterine lining.

If no pregnancy: Progesterone levels drop, and the cycle restarts with menstruation.

Let me know if you want info about how it changes with age, irregular cycles, or tips for tracking it.

Dr.kimutai

21/10/2025

28/07/2025

11/06/2025

29/05/2025

22/04/2025

21/04/2025

18/04/2025

16/04/2025

15/04/2025

14/04/2025

14/04/2025

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